teen from south asia
concerned deeply about climate change
fan of myths and superheroes
writing as a hobby, but still need tons of improvement
mostly write poetry!
youtube channel - Tindinetic

Message from Writer

love and kindness :)

"im running away from my responsibilities
and it feels good."
- Michael Scott

"What is grief, if not love persevering?"
- Vision
Pfp is my buh-dass sis traced by moi
mostly write poetry here!

Published Work

Flash Fiction Competition 2021

To Queen Eva / 23rd Street / Paradise

Everyone thinks I've had this perfect life, this perfect prince, these beautiful children. The headlines of Der Informierte Bürger always have a comment on Gil's hairline, or what statements i make with dresses I wear. I'd dreamt so many dreams. But since my fifteenth birthday, the day I married the prince, I've felt like an object. He's given me these four walls to paint on, Mama, out of the eight hundred walls of this castle. I want out, Mama, and will get out, no matter what it takes. I will have my freedom. And I will paint, without chains.


we must be out of our minds-
we must be monsters,
tucked into bed
but tucked in so tightly
that the sheets silently absorb us

to put a pink bow on a body
which can barely babble
and slap a blue tie on a neck
that incoherently sings treble
to chain them-
enslave them
in prejudice
and steal
their wings

Bo Burnham's 'Inside' and Venting

watching Bo Burnham's special 'Inside' would give anyone the urgency to just make something, anything. see, the thing about someone sharing happy thoughts with me is that I don't get inspired from it. it withers away in a few moments. it is active. but sad thoughts; they're passive, and one would think she'd be buried with them.

and my art is a celebration of pessism and a teen-agony vibe I've created inside of me. 

In his special, Burnham talks about how his panic attacks started getting better. in January of 2020, he thought he would do a live show for the first time in five years. and then, the funniest thing happened....
this resonated with me so much! I hit a new low in seventh grade, and I struggled to differentiate between a fabricated identity that I made for every different person I had a conversation with and an identity I wanted to create for myself. 
my motivations had died...

Blink : An Attempt at Haiku?

Convoluted mind / A child at play, her mom smiles / The earth shakes, she breaks.

I saw a video on metaphysics and now have oPiNiOnS

In PhilosophyTube's recent upload, Abigail, the host, talks about metaphysics. it's something I found really interesting. one of the lines that stood out to me was "when you objectively measure something, you're first making the decision that there is something worth measuring." 

isn't this what we see every single day? 
observing people's incomes to see how smart they are, their religion, caste, sex, gender, orientation to put up a point. 

yes, I am objectively a female capable of giving birth, but why was it decided that that property needs to be observed in the first place (in that context)?

my grandfather casually points in our little debates about people who hid their religions. but doesn't he stop to think, why should he CARE? 

we as a society assigned each other roles according to our biology, heritage or money or other categories. but I often ponder why we did that at all. we made the decision that these categories were worth...


still holds meaning

The idea of writing poetry perplexed me when i first started it. i considered it useless, without meaning.
but now I realise...

when the gasping corpses
perish into land
when the spreadsheets and cash
vanish into sand
when desire has robbed 
Gaia of her allure
and all one can see
are hearts impure

there'll be nothing, nothing
left of this rock
miles of ocean water
sinking docks
when all words 
lost their galore
all technical definitions
all desire
comes to a stop.

art still holds meaning.
unperished, unturned
cherished, unburned.
art's never lost,
it survives
the crashing and burning
raging human lives
and when everything
seems dictated and tainted
your mind is colour and canvas
make meaning, paint it.

life is like art
expensive, confusing
and mostly rubbish
but your life may not 
be yours to write
while complete control of art
gives you something
to live for.


we must be out of our minds-
we must be monsters,
tucked into bed
but tucked in so tightly
that the sheets have absorbed us

to put a pink bow on a body
which can barely babble
and slap a blue tie on a neck
that incoherently blurts treble
to chain them-
enslave them
in prejudice
and steal
their wings


you wanna make
frickin art
there's suffering all around
mourning surrounds
and all you want 
is something beautiful
to write about
won't help finish
your math homework
art won't help 
solve world hunger
your keyboard won't 
print out bills
what we need really 
are real world skills

trying to pick out roses
on a bed of nails
an escape from
finding your purpose 
when everything else fails
being on stage
when the ground 
around you
is burning 
with rage
think about
how self absorbed 
you are
your breakups
your friends
your loving parents
who don't have issues
your privilege 
which comes with
occasional blues
your dark thoughts
your ideas
your imagined world
your self discovery

where do I sign up
where does it start
I'm just lonely
and can't get a therapist
like other 
functioning humans
so let me splatter some paint
splatter some letters
to escape
and not attempt
to solve
real-world ...

Head above water

Don't question it

Don't question it

It's the way it is


Head above water

Try not to risk

Lean towards stability


Head above water

Try not to become homeless

Try to earn enough to fill your stomach


Head above water

Try to have a family by 30

Settle somewhere safer overseas


Head above water

Send your child to Ivy League 

Wrap yourself in cosy blankets


Head above water

Was my purpose my whole life

Now it floats naturally


Head above water

Was what life forced me to do

And it became my life 


But now the rock 

Sits stagnant

On the summit


I wish i could kick it back down



beige colour scheme - time travel flash fic

"what's the time?" asked Anita, scrolling through her social media feed.
"5:30.." replied Akshay. he peeped from behind the newspaper he was reading. his face looked like he'd seen something blasphemous.
"Dude chill!" Anita glanced at Akshay and then froze for a few moments.
she sat up and looked around.
her room was beige. ugh, what a weird colour scheme. other elements of her room looked mostly the same, but her stereo had changed into a radio. her olivia rodrigo poster had david Bowie's face on it. 
"Akshay," she took a long pause and gulped, "What year is it?"
"Anita you need to stop playing games and wear something sensible please."
"ugh, I guess I have to play along. not my fault you're mental. it's 1975."
Anita started hyperventilating and reached her closet. she dropped her phone and it disappeared mid air.
she changed into...

Ignorance: A Gift

Sometimes people think
My pieces are nice
That they could never.

The same people
They don't realise 
Just how brave they are

I don't get how they share their thoughts
Or deal with their feelings
How do they practice

The simple fact 
That they lived life
Without questioning it
Without questioning society
Without questioning survival
Without introspection
So brave.

Sentience is not easy
To work with
Yet we're all burdened with it

How brave are you, traveller!
You never wished for it to disappear
You always think about facing obstacles
And never about how you could just
Eliminate yourself out of the situation

That's just so brave
I wish i were you, traveller
Ignorant, and fitting nicely into 
Whatever dreams 
Were gifted to you

All I wish for is
For me to have
Your powers, traveller

The Office characters and when i feel like each of them

  1. A Michael - When i seek an awful amount of attention (24/7)
  2. A Jim - When i get that attention
  3. A Pam - When i feel like "i am the ONLY normal one in this family!"
  4. A Dwight - When i feel like "i am the ONLY crazy person here"
  5. A Kevin - When i haven't exercised and scroll through social media
  6. A Kelly - When i hate myself but also love myself (24/7)
  7. A Ryan - When i realise i took advantage of someone
  8. A Stanley - When i just wanna GO HOME
  9. A Darryl - When I feel like the cool side character in someone else's movie
  10. An Erin - When i feel like i am not a character AT ALL
  11. A Gabe - When i feel d e s p e r a t e
  12. An Andy - When everyone gets annoyed after i sing
  13. A Phyllis - When i care too much
  14. A Meredith - When...


I developed the courage to ask them
Ask them, finally
They, who speed up my heart
They, whose smile is one of a kind
Their dimples, wells of
Whose face is one locked in a cage
Inside my mind
But i don't have the key
And i want it to stay there forever
But not without
Them near me

But, all my hopes shattered
When i can't reach out to them
And all that's left of them
For me
Is dopamine.

Fuyez (Run) : flash fic

I started writing to her when I was only fifteen. 
I was already at the top of my class in French, but I started out sending emails to someone who claimed to be ‘Claire’, for credits. She never told me her last name or sent a photo, but with each email we started becoming the best of friends.
I was no longer in need of credits, but I kept talking to her. There were no phone numbers, no names, at least no true names. The characters in the stories she painted were “the doctor”, “the boss”, “guy who sits across my desk”. 

I often missed writing the emails when her and I weren’t too familiar. But I’d been regularly writing since she told me about her 3 year old. 

Who’s this baby? Anything you know about it?

She called it “the baby”, and vented about it for about seven months. Last she wrote about it was, September 27 last year,...

Teenager : A Recipe

A cup of angst
Two cups of tears
So severe

Spending all your time
Waiting for
The storm to come near

A dash of confusion
Let it set
Don't let it get
Enough rest
Nerves constantly
Being put
To the test

Three cups of insecurity
A teaspoon of mirrors
So many options
Yet a lot less to consider

Has it already already been five minutes?
Well, toss it in the bin
And do it all again.

script : it's ok to be neurotic (see footnotes)

[definition of neuroticism flashes on screen, I read it]

hey neurotic people!

Joe here!
Joe mama!
today we're gonna find out if hiding your neurosis under many layers of security induced by humour is really a good idea
(maybe not!)
a bunch of researchers called up some people with depression in group A and the ones without in group B. Still with me here? I see your mind tryna sneak in nihilism into your lifestyle. Not today!
Anyways, Group B dint laugh at dark memes but Group A did. Why would they laugh at something that literally pains them everyday?

depressive memes are seen by depressed people as funny and enjoyable and they may increase positive emotions in some people with depression – even if the content isn’t what most people would think of as positive.
dark memes are a form of cognitive reappraisal for depressed people.
what's cognitive reappraisal?
it's basically changing how you interpreted an event. neurotypicals look...

i cried n i dunno why

mumma told me a guy was going to come down to our house to pick up the rose syrup. my grandpa bought it for this tradition thing, but it's not the brand we use. the guy would take it, give me groceries and ice cream, and deduct the syrup from our bill.

seems simple?

mumma started sleeping (she does this weird thing where she sleeps in the afternoon so she isn't sleep deprived) and so I took her phone out of her room; that way she isn't disturbed. then she calls me inside, I'm feeling sleepy, so I sleep near her. I put in my earphones and listen to a song on Spotify. 
it's 3:08. exactly eight minutes have passed since I've slept. dad calls me, in his usual panic-inducing tone, to tell me that the guy dropped the stuff at our house, the ice cream would melt if I don't go and pick it up right now. 
I go,...

39 Minutes - Cli-Fi Flash Fiction

They’re coming for us.
I’m hiding behind a trash can, barely surviving. 
The Affluents have let the vicious SmartDogs out in search for us. They can detect a Refugee from miles away.
On Pangea, the only landmass not submerged on earth, the Refugees are fighting for food, water, and dear life.
I was never educated in a fancy school. I’m only literate. But the lessons my mother left me with shaped my personality. 
I earn hardly a rupee or two. I have been trying to apply to the Alfonso School, but the students are many and assets few. And since my mother earned 5 rupees a day while the Affluents were earning hundreds of thousands, i had to turn to criminal activity, like all the other poverty-ridden humans. I am, like the thousands of other outlaws, a Refugee. And I’m being hunted down. 
I’ve heard they throw them into the ocean. Some say they make them slaves till death. I...

Dust Jacket

me in 250 words

Three communities to which you belong (these can be unusual).   

Leaving internet 'communities'
South Asian, STEM kid, and... wow. Nothing else at all. Am i personality-less?

Three places you learn well (these can be unusual).    

in a room alone, in a room with lots of background noise, and on my terrace.

Three adjectives your peers would use to describe you.

Who's she lol? Oh..
Obnoxious, smart, self proclaimed ugly.

Three adjectives your family would use.

Fat (in their inner monologue as they scan me from head to toe), intelligent, quiet.

Three adjectives you would use.

Determined, quirky, existential.

Three beliefs you hold.   

I'm too paranoid to believe, but

The world is closer to an inevitable doom;
Everything is meaningless, but that gives us an opportunity to create meaning;
Contrary to my grandpa, i believe all humans do have inherent basic rights. They all deserve to be respected (hate the sin, not the sinner).

Three sources of comfort. ...


i'm at a loss for words
I feel
like i'm aware 
yet not conscious
and barely 
trying not to slip

The World Through Her Eyes - Flash Fiction

i tried to hit the snooze again. but i'm forced to wake up and i'm drowning in thoughts this brain has trapped me in. another day taking colorful pills in a dress that's just the right length. another day spent hopeless. 
i just want someone to drag me out of this hellhole of adolescent estrogen. someone i can see the outside with. 
I peep from behind the desk. she's looking at me like i'm up for sale. maybe i am. maybe it's yet another almost-dead-inside person who gives up.
maybe it's not. 
eh, it's a new day....


Billions of brains in your hands
Unchained by hierarchies of knowledge
Should make you feel
Yet every time I look at it
It makes me feel
More and more

Hey Google

boomers think of the internet
as a detached entity
almost satan
and then consume everything 
it wants them to

zoomers think of the internet
as a part of themselves
documented ever since they were born
and then consume everything 
it wants them to

negative self image blues
inflicted upon
by facetuned anorexia?

we got a subreddit or two
encouraging obesity
and distract yourself with memes
haha this guy has dementia!

there's a gal on Google scholar 
searching names
a guy making his livelihood 
playing games
and then there's you
you lay
still and 
watch him play
for hours on end
sleepless and
deteriorating health

modi is a reptile
sonia wooed a man
donald's from Russia
peppa pig's a sham
here's a thousand different diets
did Epstein kill himself?
struggling with identity?
put a label with this test

maybe buzzfeed quizzes
and keyboard activism 
aren't a crime
but maybe nana was right

maybe I am wasting precious time

but where...


we're not afraid 
of death
but of all
the suffering 
that comes before it
keeping our heads above water
we'd prefer to be eaten by sharks
than to slowly drown 
into blue

an abcderian poem

aimlessly writing
(boredom induced)
crafting an intricate
fugitives, wielding
guns, raining

lie, in hopes of deceit
malicious intentions

numbers, support
people fall
quiet, numbers
render them

under pressure

yells into the

a letter to my 8 year old self

dear 8 year old self,
firstly, buy doge coin.
secondly, in about 11 months and 7 days, you'll finally love something and understand how love works. 
read up on menstruation 'cause you'll be so confused when your school tries to teach it to you. 
don't depend on school for anything. try not to trust people. don't try to fight the fact that you ultimately have to do what papa-mumma want you to do. 
try to do self reflections once in a while, but don't fall in too deep. don't try to look at everything from the myopic lens of your own self actualisation. 
don't be soooooooo frickin' agreeable.
don't be a teacher's pet. socialise, don't be a loser. snitches get stitches.
keep reading books. pick up painting, even though you know you kinda suck at it.
the world sucks, don't sugarcoat it. try to keep your head above water. 
don't let estrogen drag you down. you might feel ugly, because...


She was,
simply put,
anxious, even.
her nerves were acting up.
it'd been, like, two years
and they gave her a false delusion
false comfort
false security
to hit 'delete'
but now
All of her is 
getting captured 
and the comments aren't 
what she's used to
she almost forgot
how traumatic this was

as she chipped on her fingernails

how she wished to hit
but felt helpless.

Mid-June Grab Bag


prompt: a story or poem about an elderly person looking back on their life and recalling what they consider to be their greatest achievement. (NewPoet)

I asked my grandpa 
“Was there ever a 
Where you felt 
That your life was
(As a young person, I’m trying to find it)

“Not really, no.
I didn’t have any
I just followed my grandpa’s advice.
I just went with the flow.”

Oh, a peculiar way to live. 
Yet a path many take!

“I have four children,
All of them have settled,
Into their cozy homes,
And I don’t have to meddle.
My job was secure,
I was at high posts,
Even met the prime minister!”
He always boasts.

I always dreaded that my life would pass
Without any feeling of fulfilment
But when he told me 
He didn’t have any goals
I felt alright.
I knew
Life would go alright.

Science Fiction Competition 2021

21 Seconds

Sunsets and sunrises are getting dimmer every day. 
I fear Aisha would never know what they look like, so I paint them for her every weekend. I could click a picture, but I want it to be more personal, I guess. The hospitals are so expensive nowadays; breathing seems like a rich man’s game. With every inhale sulfur dioxide enters our bodies, who knows if I’ll survive till Aisha’s all grown up to appreciate the beauty of sunsets, or even look at it.
I was born in 2029. I’ve seen the world rot in front of my eyes. The leaders kept deflecting the problem of climate change, and the public was ignorant. In 2050, however, Gaia gave up protesting. The ozone got worse, the temperature rapidly increasing. From Mumbai to Miami, land was submerged. To hide the sun, the governments started the Aerosol Project. Necessity is the mother of invention, so teleportation technologies were made. People could visit each other without breathing...


I googled
writing prompts
to get rid of my 
writers block
and it directed me
to write about
a fragment of a memory
and even if I am only a teen
I've had a pretty privileged life
many, many great things
yet when I think
of a fragment of memory 
I could freeze
I can't recollect anything
has my life been
so worthless
i've loved and i've hated
I'm doing academically well
i've had many hobbies
and achieved so much through these years
but i just can't seem to recollect
a memory i wanted to

Science Fiction Competition 2021

21 Seconds

Sunsets and sunrises are getting dimmer every day.
I fear Aisha would never know what they look like, so I paint them for her every weekend. I could click a picture, but I want it to be more personal, I guess. The hospitals are so expensive nowadays, breathing seems like a rich man’s game. With every inhale sulfur dioxide enters our bodies, who knows if I’ll survive till Aisha’s all grown up to appreciate the beauty of sunsets, or even look at it. I’m spending most of my income trying to provide her with cleaner air, so she mostly stays insides. 

Aerosol injections are getting worse every day. The Rebels have tried to expose their truth and propose alternative solutions. The government tries to ban most of them and tries to intervene as much as possible to reduce their funding. I’ve applied Aisha into their training program so we can give her an early start as soon as the slots...

Vishnu's Lament

preserve, uphold
conserve                        a life-bubble
keep them shielded 
from self-made              troubles
that was the job             
the work was simple
perfect                                      ecosystem
but it went brittle

maybe he slept through evolution
let his avatars do                   God's work
but in the corners of an animal's brain
sentience lurks

it grows and expands           until
it burns
and all that's left is                avarice
it bends, twists and turns

it leaves the poor         destitute
it leaves the hungry     famished
it leaves the green       barren
it leaves the shore       drowned

it finds cover           ...

echo chamber

Give me internet likes
Give me internet subs
Look at me getting pretty
Or getting all tough
You could be me 
So famous and happy
Be a part of something soon
That's bigger than you

I wanna be a member
I want the algorithm 
To create an echo chamber 
For me

I'm the only voice and 
Everyone just agrees
Everyone just

School taught me so little
This white guy taught me too much
Enough to fit in
This cave
 I wanna take to my grave
And sometimes I get 
Too influenced with my feelings
Victimhood becomes
A huge thing to take in
Sometimes I think too rationally
Which makes me think philosophically
Brings me back to my feelings
But I'm just doing this to avoid my feelings
So dear algorithm
Please create an echo chamber for me
Where everyone agrees with me

Doomer - A Spoken Word

the words you spit out of your mouth
they're nothing profound
millions of angsty teens
have had the same fricking frown
aww, peer pressure got you down
seeing the world transparently
makes you feel like you're drowning
the whole worldview you created
you find yourself doubting
all frameworks and all authority
injustice makes you angry
your blood boils 
and then you remember
you have no choice
powerless, we consume untruth
and think self awareness
prepares us for doomsday
with the false agency
we are playing with ourselves
the planet will crash and burn
big tech will leave no data unturned
quote unquote experts will be fed money
falsehood we'll learn
political, starting culture and class wars
without purpose in life
and the last solution to all this negativity
will be lighters and knives


a red circle
a 'ting' sound
the bell icon
a three second
hit of 

could be more rational

love is the master
love is the slave
love and grief
you'll take
to the grave
love is the hero
love is the knave
love is why we do
love is why we hate
love is why we mourn
it's why one can never
start with a clean slate

it provides you comfort
it gives you a home
it gives you longing
when someone's gone

when a human
makes you the point of
their life
it's a different kind of feeling
it enslaves you
but it embraces you
and shields you 
from dark alleys
you wander into
"someone made you
the point of their life
so you must be worth it
give yourself a try"

isn't it funny
we're sentient
we're intelligent
and yet we actively
choose enslavement 
our lives
even though it's the 
to do.

4 a.m. thoughts

you have 
will to survive?
ha, such an ape instinct.


my sister Ava
she's five years old
she does a lot of things
and she can do so much more
her activities are her speciality
they're her charm
but when staring at pixels
she falls into a trance
she watches a bunch of white girls
the same I used to watch
they make a bunch of useless stuff
but they're colourful and pop

oh look! she's crying
I ask her why
"they took away the ipad"
she replies with a sigh
she doesn't even smile
it seems like she's at gunpoint
almost like a compulsion
for an hour and half, without any point

she'll watch videos with creepy graphics
and repetitive music that haunts my sleep
and if she's too sad to see the routine end
she'll watch it on repeat

I worry for Ava
as she stares at her screen
with no awareness of her surroundings
she doesn't glow or gleam
and maybe I should to take
the charm-sucking...


as I clear away 
clouds of ignorance
I see 
yet more of them
and #deep only 
scratches the surface
introspection will only 
lead you to more darkness

and when i have
too much time on my hands
too many thoughts and no one 
to distract from them
i fall into a steep spiral
of selfish self reflections
it holds no meaning 
and is merely a deflection
but from what? 
these are just some
1 a.m. thoughts..

Superficial Problems - A Spoken Word

Hi Divya
What's up Divya
Your hamster died?
Just get another one, bhai.
Oh ananya 
You feel like your family is falling apart ananya?
You feel like people leave when you become vulnerable ananya?
There are people in Africa ananya
Who cant go to bars to meet friends ananya 
Children abandoned by their families ananya 
Your problems are invalid.
Hey rohan
You feel as if you're losing control of your life rohan?
You feel as if you're burdened with a nice brain rohan?
There's girls in villages who can't go to schools rohan
There parents can't send them to coaching rohan
Their basic necessities aren't fulfilled like yours. 
You're privileged and this is the path for you rohan.
Stop saying you don't know if you want this,
Many people would die for it rohan.
Sup Priya 
Your feelings are invalid priya.
Your PC broke and you can't get a new one priya?
You are sunk in college debt priya? ...

Casual Death

it's almost scary
how a basic element
of sentience
i'll admit times are blurry
but it's a warning sign
how our empathy
has bailed
behind closed doors
we're oblivious
to the suffering
of displaced families
of corpses gasping for breath
and the humans that await 
hopeless, without rest
we glance at the newspaper
force our muscles to frown
for a moment or two
and then we drown
into an ocean 
of blood

a message unread - lyrics

summer vacays have started
as far as I remember
I really connected 
with you last November
a message unread 
is not just a message unread
it fills me with worry 
it fills me with dread 
a message unread 
is not just a message unread
I have to pen down my mind
sleepless on my bed

you're a special someone 
to me
you're my special place
to be

so when my message's 
and I get no 
my connection
my ocean 
starts to dry

I would race
to your place
in a maze
I'll set the walls ablaze

I'll wait
for your text
sending you
my best
is this some kinda
messed up test
sleepless nights
chaotic rest

Boxes - A Spoken Word

boxes, boxes, boxes,
I'm not a contortionist 
but I'd like like to fit in these
boxes, boxes, boxes
too afraid to explore identity
I'd rather stay in monotony
with these boxes

am I a jake, or an Amy
a harry or Hermione
a jim or a pam
gimme a break, damn

they're so alluring
these boxes
they make up for my
lack of personality

because what is small talk
without buzzfeed quizzes
which take us to the end point 
without going through mazes
but sooner or later you'll see
that the destination gave you
a false sense of security
if you just took the journey 
without wanting a huge hit of dopamine
I promise you, mirror
it would be much more fulfilling

you could make your own box
full of securities and flaws
it won't be governed by
these artificial laws
these barriers in front of you,
you could break down in time
because what are these walls
if not...


Carefully crafting
A genuinely stable              onion
make a label
and act accordingly
provide security
dissolving in                        vanity

spiral into insanity
when the layers 
peel down                           slowly
weighing down
grounding this                     to the core
but the shell remains
it's lost galore
so what are these layers for
their purpose just kinda dies
and they accept all truth and
all lies