You're lucky, you know.
You know what it feels like to be stowed away in someone else's heart. Yet you don't even know it. And it's not like you'd even care to realise.
You've got everything. A cluster of friends, an aura that commands respect, a smile that turns heads. And yet you don't even notice the way she stares at you, or how she carefully picks her words to make you laugh. You lie in bed, unaware that she's thinking of you - yearning for an acknowledgment, approval, maybe even some love in return. And would you care?
You'd be flattered for a bit, then a little disturbed. "So she's been... watching me for all these months?" you would whisper to your friends. They would probably steer clear of her for a bit. Just so they weren't the 'next victim'. And she would cry. She would sob and sob and sob if you realised - outed, disrespected, hated by...
She looked over at the lifeguard. Great. She one of them, then. Them, the straight girls I always fell for. The ones I never got.
She tucked her hair behind her ear. That was flirting, wasn't it? She was flirting with the lifeguard. Well. I could see how one could find him attractive. The muscles, the hair, but the eyes so dull. How could such a work of art be interested in him?
I looked away. I couldn't let myself get attached. But I found my eyes drifting back to the curve of her jaw, the soft wave in her hair, the glint in her eyes...
Suddenly I snapped my head back down to the sand, cheeks burning. This was ridiculous. She was a random girl on the beach, one whom I would never see again, and there was no chance on earth she would ever give me a second thought.
I looked over at the lifeguard because I didn't...
friendship is that look, that telepathic look that needs no words. it's that sense of calm, shared love, hate, grief, regret, the feeling that you're never divided. it's the laughs, the love, but the tears too, the tears that mix together because in friendship you're never alone.
there's screams, but in those screams,
the steepest part of the hill of hell,
the thorns grow thick when it's so close to