Tachi

New Zealand

life can be hard so be kind.

Published Work

Hey, wanna go get bubble tea?

Take me out for bubble tea,
it's just the right day, the right mood.
if you wanted you could get coffee,
either one will do good!

which one will you pick?
what if we share our drinks?
I mean, it's just logic!
cheers! -clink-


 

my dearest one...

I can't write about her anymore,
It's like she's fading.
oh, how I adored
her. (and only her)

even this isn't working,
nothing will work,
it's like the feelings will stay lurking,
like you won't stay instead, leaving a mark.

my heart just hurts
we're no longer together
all I ever wear now: sweatshirts
I just can't be productive anymore 

It makes the air harder to breath, forcing its way in.

self conscious is like air to me
it envelopes me,
it forces it's way in.
I breath.
in.
out. 
in.
out.
and then it'll stay
I cant shake it off
it'll envelope my mind
and slowly break me apart.
in.
out.
in.
out

Breaking. Slowly but surely.

Slowly, the cracks in my heart turn into crevasses and soon I will break into a thousand different pieces. 

Breaking. Slowly but surely.

Slowly, the cracks in my heart turn into crevasses and soon I will break into a thousdand idfferent pieces. 

constellations

The greatest conquest, to steal the stars when they become your difficulties, what a grand ending. From time to time I think, I'd like to go where the constellations go.

The nothingness

we were a beautiful vessel...
but there a hole in us, a flaw 
and we will sink into the cold dark 
nothingness.
what is nothingness anyways?
there cant be nothing... 
so why am I scared?
where is the bucket to rid of this water?
it's filling up faster and faster...
but you've been saved, by the boat the person I didn't know was there...
why did you leave me here..? 
I don't want to sink...
it'll be cold and dark...
you knew that I hated the cold...
 

Mum’s smile sneaked across my face.

I love it when that happens.

I glace at a reflection
and, there she is
and there I am.

It warms my heart
to feel her
so close to me.

The second I want to live in...

For a second everything was alright,
I looked up and saw this beautiful view,
everything was faraway and perfect
I was alone, yet happy
but then it was over.
back to earth with all these people
all of them surrounding me...
 

let me sleep...

...
where am i...?
the sunlight is so bright...
What's that smell?

hey! wake up!

whos that?
is someone there...?

Wake up! You idiot!
Please... wake up!



I'm sorry, I'm just so tired...
let me sleep...

no... no! nurse, nurse!? 
hurry up! please...
please don't leave me...


i'm sorry... 
goodnight...

"What is your cause for hope?"

I am lost in this god-dammed labyrinth.
And I know I shouldn't curse 
but here I am in this labyrinth
Along with these fake characters in the books,
except they will make it out, they have a set destiny.
While I am unstable at every moment, my destiny forever changing
so what is my cause for hope?
I'm not quite sure so, here I am trying to find one
It's the little things because there aren't find any big ones
or maybe, I don't have a cause for hope
because I'm not a character in a book.
maybe my destiny isn't a thing, 
I am not equipped to make it out of this labyrinth
maybe its time for a self-sufficient world,
hidden in the corner of this endless maze,
maybe, I'll no longer be lost If I build this world,
I could be home, be safe.
or not,
maybe, I need to seek great perhaps 
and maybe that is my...

the 'new' school

The grass was greener when we came back. 
Everything was cleaner, nicer. 
Soon it'll all be ruined. This peace.
It's sunny today.
The leaves reflect the light
it makes them seem see through. 
Everything is perfect right now.
Everyone is silent, working
but all I do is stare out this window.
Thinking. Writing in my mind.
but somehow I can't get my thoughts right.
And soon the grass will be trampled.
Turning brown, dying. 
Rubbish will over flow the bins,
spilling onto the ground. 
Polluting this once safe place.
The birds will leave, flying away
trying to find a new home. 
shouts will rise from our mouths
calling for each other,
once again disturbing the peace. 
if we are just kids, 
how are we ruining such a wonderful place?  
 

The voice of an angel

Listening to you sing
it making my heart swell 
And my face has this goofy smile
I have to hide it though
you don't know yet
I just want to sing with you
but you seem so peaceful
with your guitar, so relaxed
so perfect with the sun shining
the coulds passing
I could stay here forever.
 

Stuck.

I'm stuck
should I write?
or should I give up?
 

I'll miss you, my friend.

I knew this time would come but I didn't expect it so soon,
that you would be taken away from me.
We didn't even make it to the end of the year. 
I had so many plans for us.
I wanted to do so many things with you.
maybe it's for the best
that you're taken away from me
before we both get hurt.

I don't know if we'll ever see each other again
hopefully, we will, hopefully, you still care.
why don't we make some plans?
just you and me...
because even if I get hurt...
I want to risk it, I know you're worth it.



 

New Zealand Haikus

1. 
Your eternal sun, 
Burnt sunshine and cold winters, 
Where is New Zealand? 
 
 2.
Words had to be said 
About its diversity  
In people and plants  

3. 
Smiling faces 
Melting chocolate ice-cream 
on these summer days...   
 
4. 
From above the lake 
You can see the stary night. 
The stars of NZ 

The question on my mind

Did you leave for a reason
or did you just get sick of me?

why can't it stay? this peace.

as the seconds pass by,
I realizes that I might miss 
this unexplainable waiting
If only it could stay like this
peaceful, but it can't 
soon I will be alone
and the deed will be done. 
 

volleyball

volleyball one of the many of my despised sports,
don't get me wrong I'm not bad
not like my class,
playing on this autumn day,
it's warm with a soft breeze, 
even though it's the wrong time of year
the sun was shining bright with not a cloud in sight
It's loud with calls for the ball
and the laughs, they sound so joyful!
I'm enjoying this, I'm happy 
watching them play, will all their stuff-ups
and that's okay because the ball was still in the air
flying into someone's fists or palms,
maybe it's because they're having fun
that they don't mind the mistakes,
or when the ball hits the ground 
because they still love when the ball falls
onto the other side of the court
onto the ground, the grass,
I shouldn't be but I am happy 
and maybe that's okay too...

 

I'm not sure what you want anymore

Sorry
Im not sure why
but it seems that's what you want me to say 
so I'll say it, to make you happy
even it hurts me your smile,
your smile is worth it.

Sometimes you want things and I understand
but sometimes you're so confusing
like a manga with too much writing 
or a sunshower, smiling but angry or disappointed with me
why do you make things hard?
you could just tell me.

no matter how much I apologize
it's never enough for you
you just take and take 
but I love you so I stay 
but what if you leave?
just like everyone else...

Maybe I should move on
before you hurt me
but it would still hurt just as much 
for now..
for now, I'll stay with you...
but will you stay with me?

Late night thoughts

I'm dancing in my room
when really I need sleep 
no pressure though 
I'm thinking about your face
and I realize how alone I am
I guess I should stop


 

dark

Where did the light at the end of the hall go?
or was that you?  

I am here

You gotta stop thinking like that
you are good enough
just the way you are
with all your faults that
you don't like about yourself
guess what I like them
you don't have to be perfect
I'd never want you to be
cause your imperfections 
make you just that much 
beautiful and I want that
imperfect you 

don't you ever think you're not loved
not even for a moment
if you need me?
I'm here
now you don't give up on 
yourself anymore 
if you feel like giving up
I'm still here!
cause you're not going to give up
you're stronger than that
you're not "just alone"
you are not alone
and you'll never be
I swear on my heart 
I'll never leave you alone
and I'll never let anyone hurt you
and your heart
I will protect you from 
everything I can

[insert title here]

where have you gone?
my will to live
my will to write
why have you left me?
left me with nothing
nothing but self-pity.
if only you stayed 
then everything would be okay
 

rhyming my writer block away

excuse me, ma'am?
It seems you lost your pram
That had a lamb
you better scram
or you could take the tram 
or you could buy this ham 
it would be good with jam 
I mean there are also clams 
oh, there's old uncle sam!
and look my good friend Abraham!
let's have a feast, oh please ma'am!
 

I have no inspiration whatsoever

Lost inspiration
or I've just lost my touch 
maybe I need a vacation
do I just need a nudge?

could I be lost?
I feel that I am,
maybe I'm too soft
could I be a scam?
 

I just can't...

Your name is still my password because if I change it its like its really over... no chance of survival... it'd be like I'm betraying you... like you really won't come back....

The story of Paikea and the whale (a script)

The Whale and Paikea Radio Broadcast Script 
 
 
[background ocean/waves sound fade in] 
 
Narrator- “The Story of Paikea and the whale” 
[background ocean/waves sound fade into forest sound] 
 
Narrator- “upon the island of Hawaiki there was a mighty chief, who had seventy-one sons, and seventy of his Nobel sons were Chief. But Chief Uenuke’s  seventy-first son was the son of a slave, so her son, Ruatapu was of no worth.” 
[background forest noises, “Haere Mai!”] Chief 
 
Narrator- “one day, Chief Uenuku decided to make a mighty waka so he, and his men *cut down a tall tree, hollowed it, *smoothed it, and *carved it. And when it was finished it was painted red, and strings of feathers hung from it.” ^ 
*[chopping, sandpaper, and carving wood sound]  
^ [“Tu Meke”] 
Narrator- “Now the chief brought together all his sons, and he combed and oiled and tied their hair into top-nots.” 
[chatter and vocals] 
 
Narrator- “Chief Uenuku did their hair himself, for it was tapu a sacred thing for them. But...

All in my head

why do you stare?
I can't be talking to myself, 
can't you see them?
please tell me you see them!

They're just Hallucinations. 
no matter how long I wait they're still there 
Making me relive the nightmares that were real
weren't they? 

look at them.
surrounding me.
but when I reach out my hand goes through thin air
why did you have to leave me?

 

Is this a final goodbye?

I'll miss you so much
But I still understand that
It's time to move on
 

Insomnia

All I can say is sleeping doesn't come as easily as it used to.
I know this and now you do too.

To you

hey,
I don't know if you need this but I just want you to know
you deserve everything, you deserve to be happy.
And I know I'm no therapist but I promise 
I will listen and I will care.
 

Just push the feelings down

why is there an ache in my heart?
I don't understand anymore
I thought I moved on 
but when I see your smile
I can feel the butterflies
more like caterpillars 
wiggling around inside me
all I know is that
I cannot feel like this 
these feeling need to go
I need to push them down
down until they are no longer there
no more of this
you left I cant still feel like this
I just cant
 

aching

alone
but together
in a way 
I'm not as 
lonely as you 
think
or maybe
I am 
 

The story of Paikea and the whale (a script)

Narrator- “The Story of Paikea and the whale”  
[wave sounds continue throughout radio play] 
Narrator- “upon the island of Hawaiki there was a mighty chief, who had seventy-one sons, and seventy of his Nobel sons were Chief. But Chief Uenuke’s  seventy-first son was the son of a slave, so her son, Ruatapu was of no worth.” 
[background forest noises, “Haere Mai!”]-Chief
Narrator- “one day, Chief Uenuku decided to make a mighty waka so he and his men cut down a tall tree, hollowed it, smoothed it, and carved it. And when it was finished it was painted red, and strings of feathers hung from it.” 
[insert sound here] 
Narrator- “Now the chief brought together all his sons, and he combed and oiled and tied their hair into top-nots.” 
[chatter and vocals] 
Narrator- “Chief Uenuku did their hair himself, for it was tapu a sacred thing for them. But when only Ruatapu was left he said-” 
Ruatapu- “Are you not going to comb my hair as well?” 
[eh?] 
Narrator- “but his father said-” 
Chief Uenuku- “where could...

A normal conversation between two friends

[sitting in the classroom the teacher is currently outside talking to someone]

the world is so fucked up

why so?

I dunno. everything o.o the way shit works and stuff :/

Agreed. I also hate school and homework.

yes, that's is another reason why the world is fucked up as it is :< XD

homework is not cool. -school work should stay at school.

what happens at school should stay at school -,-

like what happens in the toilet stays in the toilet XD

X"D agreed 

[teacher enters and the class quiets down]

Idk where I went wrong :<

You'll get bored of me,
Annoyed of me,
hate me, 
stop talking to me,
eventually, 
you'll be like everyone else.
 

writers block

I wanted to write about this
so I put the pen to the paper
I waited and waited for minutes and
days
but nothing seemed to ever come my
way
so I waited and waited for weeks then
months 
but the feeling too deep in my soul
never really allowed the words to 
flow
 

Melancholia

I sit here silently
not crying
because I have no more
tears for you. 

Left again

And a hollow emptiness
has filled my chest
It seems that all
I am to you is a pest

Daddy's locket

gold but not real gold,
cold to the touch.
It opens and closes with the words
"you are my sunshine" inside.
I hold the sunflower shape 
as if I let go you would
disappear, fall apart
just like my broke locket...

the right to escape

picking her pieces
kissing her scars
he healed
her soft
beautiful heart
and gave her wings
such a brave
thing to do
to make it a home
and no longer her prison 
 

trapped between

I feel trapped,
trapped in this room
filled with such uncertainty 
 

Its just facts

I just wanted to say that your brain doesnt know the differece between 2d and 3d so when you in love with an anime charater its pure true love.

Social Studies

wake up. just wake up already 
the table shakes in an attempt to wake her up.
she lays still on her desk, I'm getting annoyed, this is my class time too.
The teacher keeps talking, droning on and on.
then silence. everyone is looking at me 
shit. it was me. I was sleeping.
 

For the LGBT+ community

why don't you
chose to be happy?
Because I know you can be
Because I know you deserve to be. 
because gay means happy too.

I see you as a hero,
so why don't you?
you can slay demons, 
save the world and
fall in love

you are loved 
you are supported 
you are accepted
you deserve to be happy
always and forever

Not the easiest girl to love

She has a bad habit to overthink,
over analyze everything
Don't let this define her,
because underneath all the
anxiety,
hurt,
and scars
is her, and she is so damn
beautiful,
she has this goofy smile
and loud personality 
she is kind and caring,
and she'll do anything for you
but first you need to get through
through the walls,
the barriers 
that she has build 
to keep her safe,
and when you get through don't break her
but cherish and help
her grow, please? 
 

Loves my singing. Hates my dancing.

She loves when it when I sing to her.
my voice isn't great but she seems to like my style, 
But on the other hand my dancing entertains her
it makes her smile at my unrhythmic efforts.
 

unknown

I am just another person.
There is nothing interesting about me.
I have dreams and I aspire for things.
I want to be known or do I?
But doesn't everyone?
Maybe I write but its never good enough
not good enough to catch someone's eye
not good enough for someone to care
and that's okay,
because I don't know what I would do if I had that my pressure
I already have expectations academically,
so imagine if I had pressure when doing the thing I love the most

 

the constant pass of time

Time never waits so I guess I'll have to get up and chase after it.
 

Do you?

I hope you realize how much I like potatoes- and kinda love you. 

She was a lost hope..

her body as fragile as glass, her heart protected by walls,
but her mind left in the open
is where the monsters attacked, 
and now we have lost her too...

Stay or leave? Your choice...

I wish I could tell you. Tell you my worries and my hurt, my hope, and desperation. I wish that I could tell you that I'm hurting, this time I know the reason, but I know you'll run away. I know that you think I'm okay and it has to stay that way. It is okay though cause I know you are scared too, I know that you won't face my demons with me but leave me to die falling, falling into my hate and despair. So maybe if I stand a little higher look a little further you'll stay for longer and we can grow, not separately but intertwined like a vine growing in a damp dungeon. yes, I am the dungeon, I have lies and hideous things, shameful monsters even hiding inside me, and if you decide to stay because I've changed you'll learn my hurt and my woe, you'll learn why I still have hope along with...

Shadows

Misunderstood.
She was a mess
losing herself
in the ways
of the world 
never heard
never seen
those eyes,
deprived
held a fire
a fire to remember

Talk

Your laughter
and tears 

tell me 

dreams 
and inevitable desires

tell me

life kills me sometimes 
I live too

tell me

what was home 
take me there

a few steps more
a few steps more

The way it is

those eyes,
those dead eyes...
I wonder 
what it took
to numb the pain
and to hide 
over and over again

sometimes 
it kills man
and teaches 
how to bring
back from the dead

sometimes
 

Nothing

the days
conquering herself 
the nights
drunk on memories
she survived

enough luck enough will

what walks in?
when she all alone
but it walks in
when she's alone

Don't we?

and we fall in love
with moments
we find escape in

falling

I could be falling either way...
falling for you or falling to pieces...
or i could be both...
falling for you then falling to pieces...

starting line

I'm all alone,
alone at night
but the stars, oh the stars
they shine so bright
and give us lovely light
 
I never,
ever thought
that we would ever
be this far apart
its been a long, long time
 
I know,
I know
you've been up all night
but just know that I
have been up with you
 
it's hard,
I know
when there's
not much we can do
but I know this:
we'll make it through

A lie...

I wonder how many are
and how much they are
at peace with their thoughts
because as I live these intense wars
because as the fog of magic moments lift again 
I am left with nothing but my own chaos
and with every breath, I ache
while my eye grow weary
and I become desperation 
so raw and real
but that's okay because
at least I become
a believer 

The "Gift" of Being Short

being short is a curse
That is what I like to say
because people don't know
What it is like in the day to day
 
patted on your head by people
it seems like all the time
and all the tall so evil
they think that it's all fine
 
I can't do much
maybe walk under branches...
but I feel so useless because
I'm different to the masses
 
I know people have real worries
but I just can't understand
why anyone needs to hurry
so they change their height
 
So if you wish you were short
remember that every inch is a prize.
You should probably think again
And be happy with your size.
 
 

Too long

The way
her nights battled 
the way
her soul was exhausted
this ecstasy in agony
she had known
for too long
the spinning and falling 
with weight
so strong

Nobody

I am no one
I am a shell of a person
I am broken pieces held together
falling apart
I am shattered smiles and broken hearts
I am corrupted brain and battered souls
splitting strings are holding me together
bonds that are ready to snap at any moment
The strings edge is held in the hands of chance
they are twisted and strained to the amusement of others
and at the end of the day, they are neglected 
they are left in the murk for me to pick them back up
and pull myself together

Sycamore tree

Won't you bury me under the sycamore tree?
I know it sounds crazy,
but I've fallen in love with the memories
such a mystery that tree,
It's just so extraordinary
don't put me in a boring old graveyard... 
It's just so gloomy
don't you feel the melancholy of the sycamore tree?

survival

On many edges 
with some unknown music
she lived through it all
close yet not close enough
still trying
to make sense

It goes on

You let go, you hold on
pain happens but life goes on

The far away is inside you

society is corrupted it won't let you be
And you wanna go to that unknown place
Where nobody recognizes your name.
But what if these memories won't leave you there?
What if you feel abandoned there?
What if you feel this life was better?
But why did you care for people in the first point?

she loved little moments with intensity of forever

she found harmony in those sunsets
living in disorder 
you could feel her eyes glistening
looking at the stars
she loved those stories
that only existed in her subconscious

poison to our happiness

Little things we need to lead a carefree life yet we want things to poison our happiness. We want several things to get attention from people. Once we get recognition we lose our identities. We live to maintain that image, to show perfection and maturity in front of people thus we lose our true selves. When people start disliking us we get hurt. We base our lives on the opinions of others. People who truly deserved your attention will not judge you by your appearance. They will love you for who you are. They will accept your flaws and help you grow. they will teach you how to love yourself. Such people exist they truly are you just need to find them. they will leave you in peace

You are tired take a break.

free yourself from thoughts suffocating you
free your soul to the blue sky
stare at the sunset and see the stars at night with
your child eyes... notice the beauty around you...
go easy on yourself you deserve your love...
you are tired take a break

Many dead souls, walking every night

Dance before the melody ends
don't let your spirit die
don't let your soul die

she needs change

Even on those hopeless nights, she was a dreamer
Those cold eyes, once bright held dreams so heavenly
but in the chaos of her mind hope was faraway
and she forgot the form of it.
the pain was coming back to her, 
turning her into a masterpiece 
full of darkness and despair
she missed her idyllic, yet lost self 
everything was changing 
as she needed to bloom 
for a dazzling future  

Through the years

It's true
I realize this may be a shock, but
they might leave, it's their choice
In 30 years, I will tell my children that
I have my priorities straight because
hatred
Is more important than
happiness
I tell you this:
Once upon a time
love will be true
But this will not be true in my era
My heart was broken
Experts tell me
My heart is beyond repair
I do not conclude that
Im okay
In the future,
You'll hurt me
No longer can it be said that
You will stay
It will be evident that
You'll stab me in the back
It is foolish to presume that
I love you

city of bliss

This is heaven, the country of passion
Lovers embrace one another
Here there is springtime like this which describes as infinite.
 
This is the land of love, a utopia of flower's
Grown used to peace and advancing to multiply.
What more than this do you seek?
 
A strange city, with strange people
Shedding blood with eyes full of sadness
This place is the story of a dream.

the other side of blooming

we are growing
with each passing day
something and so many things
we live in images
of powerful and wise

but somewhere inside us
we are soft and delicate 
like a child
afraid of the corrupted
submissive to protection

Not like them

I am not another accident
Another kid left in the dark
With no hope left
I see the light
I just need to go a little further

teach me... wont you?

teach me how to smile
don't leave me in a pile
I am not bile

My promise

hey. you.
yes, you.
and me.
you and me, we’re like dolls.
we’re being tossed around.
played with.
torn apart.
stitched together.
and then thrown away again.
and it hurts. and it’s scary.
and it leaves scars.
scars that will open up.
every time we’re being played with.
again and again. but hey. you and me.
we’ll be okay.
i promise.
 

waiting...

I don't know what to do
I sit here, crying
I wish I had someone
But I'm still looking

I will not.

Why should I apologize for being a monster, when no one is apologizing for turning me into one?

midnight walks

as we walk
into the street
cool numb pains
down into our feet
those city lights make
the night complete

the warm yellow glow
against the cold dark skies
reflect brightly on
the snow that flies
softly and quietly
into our watery eyes

and we look up
at the stars so bright
which shine down
on us with light
and together we shiver
in the cool of night

math class feels

the weather can't decide today
so its raining and snowing
more dreary than ever
I don't mind though
it mimics my insides
half sobbing half still
I never knew I'd turn out this way
I guess I never will

please don't ask me to talk
don't look, don't cry
I don't think I could bear it
I'm stuck in my mind
still, nature holds me
calm and white
like I could fall right into it and never die
wristwatch ticking the beats of my heart
don't wind it up lest it breaks
its ticking and more quietly still
like bird song in the distance, like footprints on a snowy hill
heartbreak, the time stops ticking