inkandstars

United States

hello!
new beginnings
new names
formerly palindrome but i needed some change
mostly write short stories and prose
she/her
nerdy athlete
asexual gray romantic
prepping for NaNoWriMo 2020!!!!!

Message from Writer

do what makes you happy. eat what makes you happy. write what makes you happy. be happy! baby you deserve it.
if anybody judges you,
kill them and eat them too

Published Work

Olivia's Lights

          The lights flicker on and off. There is a rhythm to it, a pattern to it, there has to be. Olivia watches the dance of electricity with bloodshot eyes, trying to read her future in the flashes. With every burst she catches sight of the room she is in, stark walls thrown into harsh relief stabbing her eyes. There is a crack in the ceiling above her. At least, there was a moment ago. An eternity of flickering light ago. She cannot tell if it is still there, her vision now floating with dark shapes. Something scuttles along the corner of the wall.
          She pays it no mind, trying to count the time between darkness and light with little more than a few shaky breaths. Her eyes are dry now. Every blink feels like sandpaper. If she closes her eyes, will she be able to open them again? Olivia thinks (she thinks she thinks she thinks)...

a seven step guide to saying goodbye

  1. smile. part your bloody lips to reveal pearl teeth and smile. smile like the world depends on it, for if you don’t things will crumble. smile even though your cheeks hurt and your eyes sting. happiness is a game we all lose but continue to play, so take your place in the illusion and smile.
  2. unclench your jaw. hold back secrets with your tongue, the time to share has passed. let not your open mouth betray you, so fill the gaps with echoing silence.
  3. pretend. pretend everything is fine. pretend you will not miss them or worse, pretend you will. pretend your fingers aren’t shaking on the doorknob. look them in the eyes and fake your way to safety.
  4. lie. tell them things you do not mean and hear them repeated back to you. in this final minute you share, what end does truth serve? none. so whisper your lies to a dying god, trading your honesty for hollow comfort.
  5. ...

burn

    She gazed at the empty streets. Smoke wreathed her head, burning her throat and lungs. To see her standing there, enthroned upon the rubble, one might marvel at her beauty. It certainly was unearthly, untouchable.
          One might marvel, but most don’t.
          Scars traced tales of battles won and lost across her body. Jagged angles, long healed bullet holes, a patch of burns, all telling a story too often ignored. A nasty cut spread across her chest, still dripping blood slowly down her body.
          She wore these scars like medals. They were well deserved, a warning- I have fought and been hurt yet I am still alive, tread lightly here. She glanced, unconcerned, down at her hands, still caked with ash.
          She clapped once, twice dusting off the excess powder, revealing an angry burn on her palm. The skin stretched and distorted over her bones, rippling in a way that would seem painful.
          Around her, the...

voices

sometimes i hear voices
crows whisper
        secrets in my ear
tales of a world we
            cannot
                    know
a friend passes by
laughing conversation hums
    is it the creek?
                    or
    something more mundane?
i don't want to know
        eyes closed i listen
to words 
            i
                don't
                        understand

MENTAL HEALTH PSA and a short poem

some inspirational crap that has really helped me out
said this earlier
but a year ago i was super insecure and mildly anorexic
that sucked
 but i went to war with myself and i won. i am stronger than i think and so are you

but for anybody out there who feels alone or forgotten
let me tell you some stuff

1. there is always somebody out there for you. a friend you can turn to, an adult, a teacher, heck it sounds dumb but your parents!! are there!! for you!! they want to see you succeed and be happy!!
2. talking helps. don't internalize everything. not everything you carry is your burden. you don't need to be a superhero. it's okay if you save one person, and if that one person is you, you have saved a life
3. you deserve everything good in this world. don't let anybody tell you different. just because you made a mistake doesn't...

silent watcher/silent avenger

          All day I sit and watch the people pass. Empty words and hollow faces, I learn, do not make conversation. A conversation is deeper than that, a connection we forgot how to forge. Most don’t seem to notice, content to talk without speaking. There are always a few, however, who are aware. Their thoughts are active and spiraling, full grins and heavy tears complete the human emotional package. They notice things.
          The sun rises every day
A young girl holds a lollipop, watching the pigeons with bright eyes
          Nothing can stop the sunset
The man rests his head in his hands, tired of being tired
          Words, sharper bullets than steel
She skips through the streets, feet lighter than the air she breathes
         
          I see it all. Memories, regrets, there is nothing you can hide I won’t find.
          Which is why I laugh when the woman passes me, offering a cursory smile I cannot...

75 FOLLOWERS BBY Y'ALL ARE AMAZING plus a Q and A

awww you guys are so nice! just hit 75 followers, i know that honestly not a huge number or whatever but honestly. that is 75 people who i have reached through my writing!!! 75!!!!! thanks for reading and commenting and reviewing my work, honestly it means the WORLD TO ME
if i could, i would give shoutouts to everyone of you lovely people. sadly, i cannot. so here is my shoutout-
YOU GUYS ARE AMAZING AND THANK YOU
now
to business
to celebrate i have definitely not done the cliche thing and this definitely isn't a q and a thing no definitely not why would you think that?
okay yeah i lied
this is a q and a
ask me anything you like! i will answer honestly unless my safety (or network of organized crime) is in jeopardy.
have at it my dudes
 

a proposal- who wants peer reviews?

aight so i am getting back into the swing of this lovely website
i am going to be posting some flash fiction and poetry i've written here in a bit 
but right now
who would like a piece of theirs reviewed? leave a comment and let me know

honestly man idk how to do titles HERE GOES Three Stanzas On the Subject Of Rain

No matter how gray the sky seems
Beneath inky shadow the eternally blue
    -sometimes infernally blue- light beams

Cotton clouds skip across the pond
While weighted water-laden clouds sink low
    -settle deeper- into the space above human bonds

We resent the encroachment on our ocean sky
While green waits in anticipation of the nourishment to come
    -hoping for growth- impossible with earth so dry

10 Second Essays

My 10 Second Essays

A seed is still a seed, even if it can't grow.
Water keeps us alive, but too much will drown you.
Germs won't bother you unless you believe in them.
The most beautiful flower blooms only for a few days.

Vita et Latine: Life in Latin

    You know, life is confusing. There is always someone claiming to have figured it out, the secret to navigating the world. They are always wrong. There is no "secret formula" to ace tests. No way to really figure it out. 
    In seventh and eighth grade I studied Latin. The longer I studied, the deeper I fell into a linguistic pit. Instead of being able to understand the more I pored over books, letters would break free of their proper words and float around the empty space in my brain. It was challenging. There was no rhyme or reason to endings, pronunciation, or spelling. Why couldn't it just make sense?! I felt stretched and brittle, unable to take in new information.
    But I loved it. It opened doors to new paths, constructed highways over the slow crawl of the American language. Latin was impossible, yet the best thing I ever learned. I realized, life is like Latin....