16missing

United States of America

Hey , I am a girl who is in love with books and chocolate
When things seem impossible, try
I hope my poems bring you as much comfort as they bring me
follow me on Instagram @16absent

Message from Writer

breathe... when the ache doesn't leave ignore, when the knot in your throat becomes permanent unknot it, when the stumble in your walk never stops right it yourself, and when nothing works know there is a book for everything and anything, you just need to find it

Published Work

At Night

Unfinished cigarettes lying in dark alleyways
colorful birds caressed by the shining moonlight
sunken treasures glistening deep beneath the ocean
little girls and boys clutching onto their beloved toys
sandals crashing onto the concrete
prey running from the predators that emerge in the night
candles flickering, dying 
tears drop from one's eyes 
like a single pin doping from 100 feet 
but heard a mile away 
a heart beats after the one it can't have 
a baby boy born filling the room with life and joy 
a little girl follows the crowd 
hoping to be good enough to get accepted
 a hushed conversation takes place behind closed doors
promises made 
and promises broken 

 

Many Roads

I'm so scared
locked in a maze
with only so many ways out 
so many twists so many turns 
which to take
right or left 
all these thoughts in my head
which first
which last
so many things to explore
im curious 
but implore 
you to be patient 
so many things
happeneing at once
so much to take in 
which turn should i take 
which road do i take 
the one to my right
or the one on my left

Extraordinary in the Ordinary

The Blanket

Uniform yet so bizarre 
tangible yet so unfamiliar
reachable but always miles away 
always yearning for its warmth 
always there to cover but strip bare
soaked in memories laying the road ahead 
a babys first best friend with its own name; blankie
A blanket with its own heart 
 

Broken

broken 
pieces shatter to the floor
my heart 
breaks and breaks again 
why am i the only one feeling this way 
why am i the only one crying 
i cant breathe 
i cant swallow the knot in my throat
How can i live my life
with my insides so twisted up 

 

Just a Dream

why is it 
when you  finally feel closure
when you finally are over
someone from the past
your dreams turn against you 
and there they are again 
a dream so life-like
a dream so real 
you find yourself pining
for someone you held dear
you find yourself thinking of could've beens 
all that hadn't been 
you find yourself hoping 
you did the right thing
constantly having to remind yourself 
it was just a dream

 

Painful Love

i miss u 
your solid voice 
in my dizzy world 
your insurance
when my mind is never made up 
the smile I see 
in your soft words
words can never describe how i feel for you
words will never be enough
but i'm just too hurt
so hurt that i don't know what to say 
don't know how to respond 
i walked away wanting you to say 
its okay
i apologize a hundred times
just wanting to stop the fight
but u didn't catch on 
didn't see the hurt
didn't hear me pleading with u to stop 
an unsent message is the only thing i see
I miss you 
please just answer
but i never sent it for you to answer

please.....

I miss u 
I want u 
I need u 
please
u may think that what your doing is best
but please 
just read my messages
thats enough
the tears held back for so long fall 
thinking of you 
my heart aches 
for u 
please 
just let me know 
that your okay 
i fell for u 
hard 
crashing my heart
i handed to you 
please 
please....

On A Low

im weak 
weaker than u think 
not as strong as u think 
i have on a facade
a poker face
to those who see me 
i wish i could describe this feeling 
but i cant 
so breathe 
u being here is enough 
but i am not used to this 
im used to being lonely 
to fighting and standing alone 
so please 
just be patient
im just on a low 
and make a huge difference
but i will be okay 
i will be fine
im just on a low 
trying to fight and resist
im just on a low 
 

Many Roads

I'm so scared
locked in a maze
with only so many ways out 
so many twists so many turns 
which to take
right or left 
all these thoughts in my head
which first
which last
so many things to explore
im curious 
but implore 
you to be patient 
so many things
happeneing at once
so much to take in 
which turn should i take 
which road do i take 
to the front 
or to go back 

Deserve Better

im trying my hardest
trying my hardest
to forget you 
but i cant get you out of my head
cant forget all that we had
it was for the best I was told 
You deserve better they said
But you deserve better
I told him 

 

Broken

broken 
pieces shatter to the floor
my heart 
breaks and breaks again 
why am i the only one feeling this way 
why am i the only one crying 
i cant breathe 
i cant swallow the knot in my thraot
How can i live my life
with my insides so twisted up 

 

Disappointment

That moment in your day 
when you look up at the sky 
and expect something 
anything 
a sign from above
saying you'll be fine
after a moment of hope
you sigh 
knowing nothing will happen 
everything will be aliright
you lie
that moment 
you look in the faces around you 
just looking for a friend 
there are none 
slowly 
your fountain of hope dries
you want everything to be alright
but it isn't 
that moment 
of dissapointment 
 

HI!!! What Do You Want Me To Write About?

I want to write 
I really do 
But what about 
Do I write about life
Or disappointment
Hearbreak 
Or love
What do I write about? 
Sadness
Happiness
Exceitement
What do you want me to write about? 
Tell me in the comments please
What are you in the mood for? 

Why(2)

SO angry 
Furious 
You anger me 
Why do you always do this to me 
Why do I always have to suffer this much pain 
Why ...
Why 

Again, always?

You repented once
but there u go 
falling under the same spell 
making the same mistakes 
that ruined you before 
and will ruin you now 
and will ruin you always 

why

why do i feel 
like im carrying mountains
heavy 
with heaps and heaps of...
why do i feel like giving up 
why is.....why 
why do poeple love me 
they deserve better
you deserve better
im a mess 
and im so tired 
so so tired
but i care too much to let go 
love to much to give up 
why so much pain then 
why such a struggle 
why...
why 

Never Will They Ever

every single holiday 
the tears fall 
like they've never been away 
and i tell myself
that next time 
wear waterproof mascara
but every single time i forget
thinking it will be better than the last
and they are 
but the tears still drop 
and they never stop 
as if they were waiting for a time
for a chance
for a weakness
and they fall 
gracefully 
down your cheek 
taking a right 
at your nose
straight to your heart
never forgetting where to go 
 

Whats The Point

i imagine
i wish 
but they all just tumble down 
i hope 
i dream 
but whats the point 
it will never work 
i try and i try 
but in the end 
all u say is no 
nothing is up for discussion 
nothing ever helps 
and everything gets thrown back in my face
and im always left 
helplessly in tears

Weak

Every month 
there comes a day 
where everything
tumbles and breaks
all the building you've worked so hard on 
lose their structure and just fall down 
all the love you got drunk on 
makes you wobbly 
makes you want to cry 
the tears you've kept locked 
in prisons on islands faraway 
break lose of their chains 
and run down your cheeks 
they race to the finish line 
finally reaching your heart
wounding your pride, your confidence
breaking that brave heart
the brain you've always counted on 
to see the sense in it all 
falls under the spell 
and slowly falls
under the control 
of your selfish heart
and slowly your shoulders sag 
and your neck can't bear 
the weight of your head
your knees turn weak 
your heart turns heavy 
with too much words
too much emotion 
that need to be let out 
you can't keep the tears from falling 
you can't stop the collapse 
you become weak 
I'm weak  ...

Loving You

I love him 
He loves me 
our blissful days are never ending 
i feel like i am dreaming 
please leave me dreaming
don't wake me up 
i feel like jumping off a cliff
knowing he will catch me 
i live in a real life fairy tale
where the butterflies in your stomach 
move in forever 
and become a normal feeling 
almost natural even 

 

After All These Years

After all these years
we fall for each other 
again and again 
because now I realize
that we were just kids 
when we fell the first time 
but I held my love on the line 
afraid of your reaction 
our friendship to precious 
to ruin 
but now it's gone and ruined
I don't regret that it's ruined
It's so beautiful 
to love nd be loved
maybe we have a future 
a forever ever after
maybe we don't 
but babe lets test the limits 
see how far this can go 
see if we can actually be 
a couple
I feel it inside
that you are the one 
who will make me happy 
who will tear apart my misery
who will carry my children 
in his arms
I wish I could tell you in words
how happy you make my world 
but instead I wait every night for you to say 
the words that move my ancient heart 
"I love you" 
and...

I Miss You

I text u 
all happy 
and I wait for an answer
but you don't answer
I wait 
an hour
and still no answer
my heart ahces
for you 
I cehck the time 
imagining where you'd be 
no answer still 
a day passes
another too 
where did you go off to?
My sweetheart 
I miss you 
I miss your gentle voice 
inside my head
I look through picture after of picture 
of us 
touching your smile
with my thoughts
my babe why did you leave me so?
everyday without you 
seems liek centuries without you 
I'm drowming in worry for you 
all rational thoughts gone 
my head going overdrive
I'm screaming inside
My love 
I love you 
wherever you are
I hope you're okay 
please tell me you're okay 
I miss you

Why I Write

Why I write

i write to spill my heart 
i write because it is who i am  
i disguise myself with words so beautiful and complex
i i write because that is where i find myself
I write because i can dream up people i wish were real 
people with all  the characteristics and yet all the faults of human beings 
this is why i write 
 

The End

so many emotions 
all this love 
all this care
"I love you" you say 
and my heart skips a beat
but i don't stutter
'I love you too" 
I say back 
"sweetheart"
you call me 
"don't worry babe"
you tell me 
and all the world with its worries fall away 
i'm falling for you my love so hard
And how painfully beautiful it's to watch 
how weird it feels
after all these years
for me to love you 
and you love me back 
because my darling 
our closenoess 
pulls us farther apart 
and deep inside 
I feel it still 
the feeling that keeps telling me 
that loving you will hurt in the end
after watching people closely and studyign for years
how love fails you most of the time 
but I tell myself live the moment and be true
While still my heart tells me 
Loving you will hurt in end

What Are You Doing

you text her all day 
you think of her all day
and all i do is wait 
for the moment for you to see me 
it's impossible to stay mad at you 
for more than just a day 
you make me crazy 
with jealousy 
and im scared to ask you 
are you more than flirting with me 
i see the way you look at me 
and you look at her the same way too 
but what am i to do 
i can never say no to you 
even when im mad at  you 
just stop playing with my head
because i am sick with jealousy 
you're turning into more than just a crush 
and id hate it if you broke my heart
so please just stop it with the playing around 
your laugh so distracting
i drop everything in my arms
i lose my head when im around you
but when i go to sleep 
i cant stop thinking of...

Will I Ever

will i ever
get to wave
and expect a wave back 
will i ever shake those charming hands again 
i stare at your picture 
jealous at thew lens that took it 
how many times have i wondered
will i ever see you again 
id like to miss the plane 
so i can stay and shake your hand
id like to sit and ponder 
that curious glint in your eyes
that little touch 
oh how it drives me crazy inside 
if only you knew
how our conversation 
has changed me around 
i go and come 
expecting you 
but i dont find you 
i hear rumors about how wonderful you're doing 
and im just sitting here
writing piece after piece 
about you 
How are you? 
Thinking to myself 
Will I ever 
get to see you 
again 
 

Crazy With Jealousy

is this love
cant talk 
cant walk 
cant rest
cant sleep 
can think 
without the thought of you 
tell me 
give me 
the key to your heart
you've driven me crazy 
with your flirtatious art
 tell me something 
abything 
show me 
the secret behind your smile
i see your eyes behind every window pane
i see your smile on every face
you've driven me crazy 
with your words
with your winks 
with your touch 
tell me something 
my heart want to know 
how many girls 
you've repeated these words to
how many girls 
im crazy with these thoughts
jealousy eats at me
every bite bigger than the last 
i need you to give me my pieces back 
reach into its belly and pull me back together 
either for better
or for worse
 

Can't Stop Thinking

He said a lot of things 
She didn't believe
He said a lot of the same things 
To others
He asked her questions 
but she doesn't trust anyone 
so why should she trust him?
he's cute 
but he also looks like a player 
so why should she trust him?
do they really have something special 
or was he just playing around 
she saw him looking for her 
but he could be looking for someone else 
will she ever see him again 
will she ever know 
whether it was real or make believe 
i go to sleep 
thinking of you 
tell me what did you mean
that look in your eyes 
i cant forget
tell me what did u mean 
i'm going crazy with possibilities 
all the different things i could've done 
differently 
so tell me what did you mean 
can't stop thinking of you 
i hope i see you again 
so i can ask you 
what did u mean
 

And He Waved Back

Once upon a time a boy walked up to a girl 
She took his hand and shook it 
She recognized the msicheif in his eyes 
But he just dissipated
The girl looked for him throughout the party 
she found him standing against the wall in a corner
watching her
 They locked eyes and she smiled
He told her she looked pretty 
And she said thank you 
.....Next party......
The next day she saw him again 
She was dancing in the middle of the party 
She waved
And he waved back 
She invited him to dance with her
But he refused 
SO she kept dancing 
After the party she saw him
He was talking to a bunch of guys 
SO she took a good look at him 
And walked over to say hi 
She shook his hand again 
He held on to her hand though and she noticed
She smiled at him again 
She asked him why he didn't dance with...

The Place I Can't Go

Home 
The place where I can go 
To be all alone 
Because nothing here feels like home 
Home 
The place where you should go 
When you're feeling all alone 
and just want someone to talk to 
but there is no one 
Home 
The place where I have to go 
Till I love and be happy 
Till I can find the one 
Who can make me a home 
A place where I can go 
To be happy 

It Comes At Night

Those times when you're feeling good 
then you realize deep inside 
how much you want to cry 
cry from pain 
cry from loss
cry from sadness
held up for so long 
sometimes you just want to cry 
you crave that warmth 
to be love by a lover
or just hugged by a mother
the simplest of affections
do wonders
and make all the difference
I was happily riding life
Till sadness
came 
in the darkest of nights 

The Same

I hoped for a time 
Where you would look at me as one of your own
Tell me what is so wrong 
"don't compare yourself to others" you say 
and yet you go comparing me away 
it doesn't have to be direct
but I hear how you speak of others
wishing I were the same 
Looking at me with such disappointment
I'm sorry I couldn't be the same 
You want the best for me apparently 
Then give me a chance to decide what that is 
For once let me be me
For once let me pretend 
That I am someone else
But there you go and remind me
"of my place" of my life
of past mistakes unforgotten 
of things my generation does 
Oh you will never know 
Do you still not trust me enough 
Even after all this time 
Still afraid if you let go of my leash 
That I will break lose 

In Reality

"life as i know it is over" 
Or so I thought
It's not so different than i thought
Except for that huge whole in my heart
As usual always wear a happy face 
But when alone is a different story 
I start off with hope 
But now I don't know what real and what's fake 
" I love the feel of your hands" 
Have I ever felt them? 
There was no buzz I didn't feel anything 
and yet, and yet
I still wish there was 
In my imagination butterflies come to life at one touch 
At one glance and I feel you stripping away all my insecurities 
But that's just my imagination 
because in reality 
nothing like that happens 
because in reality I am nothing to you 
and you aren't supposed to be anything to me 
and yet you are 
I mean nothing to you 
But I can't stop thinking of you 
Was I in love with the idea of...

Let You Go

Slowly  
your sparkling face
the one i thought would never leave me 
is fading 
but i hold on tight 
for a trace of you 
a smile 
i search in my memory 
too afraid 
to scared
to ask you 
to never forget me 
i want to ask you to remember me 
to hold me close to your heart 
but i'm scared
of your answer
i search your face for an emotion 
but all you do is wave
i thought i meant something to you 
but maybe i don't 
I kind of hoped for more
Is it too much to ask for? 
I guess it is 
But i still hoped 
and still 
in the depths of darkness
i think ofyou 
in the darkest of nights
i dream of you 
and now i don't know 
how i can let you go 

It's Too Late

I'm feeling dizziness about me 
I don't know whether it is mere sickness 
or just hunger
hunger for something or someone 
forbidden I can't have 
Or a thirst for a life
well beyond my reach 
I reach my hand out 
In hope 
But all in vain 
For all is gone now 
and even though...
It doesn't matter anymore
because it's too late 

Trip to the ER

2 days ago (from 5-28-18) 
My mom wasn't feeling so good 
So we went to the emergency room 
A little girl at about 14 caught my eye 
Sitting next to her father 
You could see the worry in his eyes
I locked eyes with the girl 
I thought was worried for a mother, loved one
I sent a smile her way 
That was when I saw the cursed yellow bracelet
That marked her as a patient 
Realization dawned on me 
She is the patient
She was entangled with her father 
In an embrace so tight with love and care
Trying to lighten his mood with something on her phone 
But it wasn't working
I smiled at her again trying to lighten her mood
But she looked at me like I was at fault 
Like I didn't have the right to smile 
TO bring light in such a dark place
So I sent a silent prayer above that she feels better ...

A New Beginning

Life as I know it is over.
A new chapter begins 
with new characters 
new goals 
new feelings 
and a brand new me. 
I am very confused about this new me 
but together we will get to know her 
inside and out 
Together my new friend we will live life 
through all of its moments 
I may have said bye to my friends 
But i will say hi to new ones 
But as i always say 
old friends will never be forgotten 
no matter how old they become 
There will be those who will be rude 
And those who will spit on you 
Because they are in a bad "mood'
and those who are fake 
waiting to get something from you in return 
people tell me I will regret
the decision to leave those i love most
but i tell then 
regret never but doubt i shall 
doubt myself in times im feeling down 
doubt those around me when bonds...

Status Report

Helo everyone 
status report: I’m okay just bored all the time, do you know that feeling that you wish school hadn’t closed so you can see your friends everyday. I’m feeling that way right now. 
Im not really up to writing on here because I just got a very cute notebook to write in. 
I’m hoping that at the end of this summer I will have published all of them here for all of you to see. 
I love you guys and I hope you are happy  
peace out 

To: My friends/ For A Very Long Time

For reasons I will not say 
for a long time I will be very far away 
I just want to say
you I will never forget
and all the times you’re feeling down 
remember me and my stupid ways
listen I won’t be able to connect with you
for a very long time 
if you ever need me 
remember I’m not so far away 
remember write and I will always understand 
if you have anything you need to tell me 
becuaee for a long time I will be very far away 

To: My Love

I look up at you 
Theres a funny twinkle in your eyes 
Tinted blue 
Your love for me evident in you caramel colored eyes 
You've offered me all you can offer 
Taken care of me when no one was around 
That is why i love you 
You stretch your huge arms 
And engulf me in our softness 
All the time looking at me with understanding 
Never have you screamed at me or shown me anything but love 
My dear I will always love you 
You charming smile always makes me laugh 
And your little bowtie you wear with pride 
You always have this sweet scent around you 
Like chocolate I always tell you 
Its the reason I always know your in the room 
Let me tell you Mr. Chocoalate I will always love you 

Life is but a Dream

when im feeling down 
i leave this world
go exploring a new one
one of my creating
where everyone i know 
is truthful to their word 
where everywhere i look 
i see loved ones 
where i have no enemies
where i can truly laugh and smile 
where i can find the one 
and live with him in complete bliss 
and every corner is perfect
and every mess is beautiful 
and every tear is a pearl 
and every lie is a truth 
in this world i can be myself
without fearing any opinion 
without doubting every thought 
in this world everything is perfection 
and life is but a dream 

You Will Rise

feeling weakness
you refuse to acknowledge
feeling despair
you feel like dying 
but you wont 
you will live and prosper 
because it is the only way 
you will rise 
rise higher than before 
because the strength inside will rise stronger 
it will make you alive
it will make stronger 
you will rise 
you will be alive
you will laugh 
you will smile 
you will feel 
all the happiness that wasnt there
all the sadness slowly gone away 
life will become greater 
and you will fly 
higher than than any airplane 
you will rise 
rise higher than ever before

 

Always Losing

i refuse to  let go 
to the darkness inside 
i refuse to release 
the monster inside 
i swear i will try everyday 
to get better 
but somedays you feel down 
the darkness slips past its gates 
the monster escapes its leash 
and i will still fight 
i will lasso the darkness
into its little cell inside 
i will go to war with the monster
refuse to feel the pain 
till after 
after you have battle scars worth exhibits
after the tears have escaped and filled buckets 
is it too late 
too late to be better
i laugh when i feel like dying 
smile when i feel like drowning 
is this normal 
to fight with every ounce of strength 
and yet still lose
 

Staying Safe

sobbing in pain 
tears kept inside 
for way too long 
scars wont heal 
you keep pressing knives to open wounds 
delaying any kind of progress made 
but ill never tell you though 
how much you tear me up everyday 
how much you really ruined me 
i try to make progress everyday 
devouring piece by piece of chocolate
like a drug i feel high 
so high i can sit and laugh 
and make jokes 
without breaking down and falling apart
how much it would break you to know 
how much i hate you right now 
how much you've completely ruined me this time 
but i dont know what to say if i said anything 
so i say nothing 
as usually i live live in silence 
with a heavy heart 
i paste a smile on 
and try my hardest to swallow all the pain 
for another time 
for to long 
i have kept it inside 
so i break down 
from time to...

are you worth it

come forth 
make noise 
put those feelings into words 
express your feelings
utter a sound 
give me a word 
i am lost amongst your thoughts
do i love you 
or is it mere crush 
i am lost in your silence 
how do i tell you 
that i will miss u 
miss your laugh 
miss your smile 
how do i tell you 
that i love you 
is this even love 
my heart contracts 
at the thought of leaving you 
but are you even worth all of this feeling 
 

With a Heavy Heart

with a heavy heart 
i wave goodbye 
to all the happiness inside 
with a heavy heart 
i declare me gone 
and all the merriness with me 
with a heavy heart 
i announce me lsot 
waiting to be found 
with a heavy heart 
i leave dear friends 
and lose my heart along with them 
with a heavy heart 
i sob in despair 
dragging my feet along with me 
with a heavy heart 
i tell you i love you 
forgive me for all that is lost 

the loss of us

i am crying 
tears of despair 
i am sobbing 
tears of desperation 
i am bawling 
tears of anguish 
i am wailing 
silenced tears 
i am weeping 
tears of distress 
i am mourning 
the loss of us 

tell me something....anything

you dont know what your doing to me 
choking me with your silence
tell me what to do 
give me a hint 
anything...please
we dotn have much time 
tell me who broke you so 
what killed your merry laugh 
i am trying to choke back the tears
trying so hard 
but i cant hold it in anymore 
you are breaking me apart with your silence
tell me 
something 
anything 
please

idk...

i dont know what to say 
i really dont  
i see you around every corner 
and i never know how to act
and  now that im leaving 
i dont know what im feeling
are you the one 
or is it just attraction 

All for You

tell me 
tell me what is wrong 
empty your heart 
pour it in my hands 
we dont have much time and im scared
scared of what both you and i will do without eachother 
so tell me what bothers you 
tell me the truth 
what is it that is bothering you 
i have no clue 
my friend i am her for you 
 for the good and the bad 
if not physically than mentally 
i break down every time i see you down 
i tear at my soul looking for the answer 
how am i to help you 
show me tell me 
just give me a sign 
and i will be here waiting 
ready to tear the world down 
all for your smile 

wicked thoughts

sometimes i wish you were never born 
sometimes i wish you were dead
sometimes i wish....
sometimes i feel like i hate you 
actually sometimes i'm so sure it hurts
tell me what do i do 
when i scream in pain and you dont care
when i tell you to stop and you don't listen 
when you look at me as if i'm gum on your shoes
why do you not love me 
shouldn't you the one protecting me 
but what do i do when your the one harming me 
why are you doing this to me 

idk...

i dont know what to say 
i really dont 
i see you around every corner 
and i never know how to act
and  now that im leaving 
i dont know what im feeling
are you the one 
or is it just attraction 

i just cant....

tell me do you hate me 
or is it just spite 
that makes you so grumpy 
why am i always in your way 
i have feelings 
and you hurt them 
many times over and over again 
are you not supposed to protect me 
keep me safe, love me 
but no you chose to hurt me 
i cry over the loss of who you were 
and i blame myself for who you became 
some say its just a phase 
but damn you wont get over the phase fast enough 
please i dont want us to grow apart 
i want us to grow up and be close like we were
i ve been waiting and waiting for you to epxlain 
why you suddenly acted so strangely 
but you chose to hurt me 
over and over again 
and im hurt 
so please stop 
becuase i can take it anymore 
 

please.....

my love 
my heart 
my soul 
please dont go 
please...
please dont go 
i love you 
i think of you always 
in good i promise
im here for you 
and please
dont leave me choking on my tears
dont leave me all alone 
dont leave me in this mean world 
dont leave me all alone 
please.... 
you both taught me how to love 
how to be a friend 
how to be loyal 
how to feel happiness
so please dont go 
please.....'im here for you 
i need you 
so please dont go 
                                                                  

Let Me Go...Please

Talking loudly 
Not saying anything 
Smiling proudly 
Feeling nothing 
Eyes dried open 
Tears all gone
I learned so quickly to hide them all 
When I'm queit I'm screaming loud 
When I'm happy I'm feeling sad 
And sad doesn't even describe it 
Lost myself long time ago 
I care so much about you
You'll never know 
But when it comes to deciding 
I think my mind is made 
It's time for me to go 
I knew it never would work 
I never belonged anywhere in my life
Never once in these long 16 years
Not with my family 
Not at school 
Not with you 
And not in myself 
I am trying to find myself you see
They call it growing up 
So I must leave 
I always thought it never would happen 
But if I got the choice I would choose the latter
Now that I have the choice 
Once in my life can make a choice 
I know what my...

Loneliness

I cared so so much about you, it hurt
I loved you so much
It pains me to see what has become of 
me and you 
I used to care 
now I don't 
I used to love you 
But now I don't 
What is this twisted world we live in? 
I want to talk to you about it 
But what is it worth 
You went one way and I went mine 
You see one way I see another
You do things and I do others
My friend we used to be so close 
Unseperable till they came 
You left me in the past and moved on 
It was so quick I was too blind to see it 
All the questions you asked me 
The opinions and I ignored every voice of reason
I thought deep down you might remember me 
But not a thought crossed your mind 
Hurt and alone I got used to it 
Me and loneliness became closer...

Hi, in case you didn't know

Hey guys, just wanted to say it's me Sarorah just changed my username and profile pic :) 

In A Daze( Any other title suggestions?)

I am flustered 
Don't know how to keep my feelings at bay 
The waves inside crashing hard at the beach
But do I really want them to stop? To cease? 
The choices I have to make frighten me 
The road ahead does not seem as clear as I thought it would be 
Despite my beliefs I have made connections 
And now I don't know if they will steer me in the right direction 
I don't know what to chose for myself 
My sky is clouded with thoughts of others 
I do not know how to say farewell 
And still be able to live my life with colors
I am confused you see 
In heavens I stand 
But I still feel underground
I know what you chose for me 
But is this for my sake or for yours? 
I feel a perplexity 
So deep in complexity 
That i don't know will ever settle 
Thrown off balance I render uncertain 
Without a...

Place Poem

Happiness

In silence you sit 
When the fresh breeze hits you, 
As if waking you from your sleep
You begin to hear it
The howling of the wind ignites you 
It heightens your senses in preparation for whats ahead
The silent chirping of the birds in the trees calms you
Teaching you skills like quickness, swiftness, and speed
You feel the sun's warmth engulf you in its waves 
As if putting you under a time spell waiting for you to adjust
The ants march past your toes 
You make way for them to gather their winter stocks 
Teaching you a thing or two about responsibilities
The grass tickling you amusingly asking you to play 
You start to understand
This is what growing up feeling like 
This is what life is all about 
And there lies the source of happiness 

TO LILY (she knows herself)

You either love her or you dont 
You dont have all life to decide 
So make your mind
Cuz boy she got better things to do in life
My friend wont stick around forever
And she aint gonna wait for an answer
So you better make your mind 
I'll just be standing here
Minding your business 
Wathcing you............ closely 
Cuz you better be treatin her right 
My friend isn't here to mess around with you 
My friend is looking for the real thing 
And lets just get things straight
You anit the first nor the last 
So dont go grow your ego some more
You either love her or you dont 
You either stay or you leave 
Cuz she aint no hoe 
She aint no plaything 
My friend is a princess
All in diamonds she shinin 
SO you better be bright enough 
Or your not worth her time 
My friend could find better than you 
So lets get this straight  ...

No Pause for Breath

Too Good To Be True.

You wake up,numbness, you remember why you were cryign last night and the tears come,fast, you run to the bathroom, breathe, you slow your racing heart and get ready to face the world, rejection, you turn down every offered hug and hello to hide your emotions and vunerablity, friends, you see them the reason you were crying and turn away, rushing, the tears come this time falling by the tens, memories, you remember all the happy times you had, lies, it was all too good to be true. 

Tell Me What To Do?

Stuck 
I'm stuck 
reading your poems I'm stuck 
One says do what you want 
the other says i dont give a damn
what should i say? 
tell me what do i say?
I care i wont lie 
I give a damn about us unlike you
and no this is not the best for all of us 
you both dont know what you are doing to me 
with your words you are stabbing me 
Where does all of this leave me 
because all im feeling is regret
regret and sadness for myself
left worse than before 
before the life you both gave me 
but where has that left me 
you say you dont know 
I would've done worse
well i dont wanna know 
i dont wanna know what broke us so well
with a knife severed us with a very deep but clean cut 
I cant stick around to nurse every wound 
I promised both of you forever 
but what is...

Okay

I am scared
Frightened and afraid
Do you know dear friend why 
Why I haven't asked you about this past summer?
Because I am scared
Frightened and afraid 
That it wasn't worth the rivers I cried
The tears I've spilled
The buckets I've filled 
I thought I was going to die 
Thinking about what I heard happened to you 
I went to sleep like I was drunk of tears
I woke up puffy eyed and the memories came 
Came rushing to me and I started crying again 
Your friend told me you had run away 
While I was with my cousins 
I felt my heart stop and I rushed to the bathroom to breathe
Dear Friend I don't wanna know what happened 
I am so happy that you are okay now 
That you are here flesh and blood  
And okay 
I have so much more words to say 
But I chose to end this poem here 
Because you are okay  ...

My Always and Forever

I love you 
I love you with passion 
I love you with all of me 
I love you with everything 
Everything I have and is yet to come 
When life gave you to me 
I didn't believe my luck 
I couldn't understand how I could deserve you 
I couldn't comprehend where you came from 
Always at the right time 
You remind me of who I am 
At the time of hardships
I find you at my side 
I will always love you even if you are messy 
Even if you are ugly or not quite pretty 
You always fill me with fantasies 
And I drool only at the thought of you 
You are everywhere and nowhere 
You are my first and my last 
My always and forever 
 

My Always and Forever

I love you 
I love you with passion 
I love you with all of me 
I love you with everything 
Everything I have and is yet to come 
When life gave you to me 
I didn't beleive my luck 
I couldn't understand how i could deserve you 
I couldn't comprehend where you came from 
Always at the right time 
You remind me of who I am 
At the time of hardships
I find you at my side 
I will alwyas love you even if you are messy 
Even if you are ugly or not quite pretty 
You always fill me with fantasies 
And I drool only at the thought of you 
You are everywhere and nowhere 
You are my first and my last 
My always and forever 
 

You Don't Know

You don't know 
How many tears I've shed for you
How many days I've prayed for you 
How many days i stayed up hoping 
Hoping it works 
So many tears for what might happen 
So hard to avoid all the questions all the stares
The why are you still there and not heres
My mothers advice I've ignored
And all the reason I've ignored
In hope 
But it didn't work 
I think about you constantly hoping your out there happy 
Hoping you maybe changed your mind 
Maybe the reason got to you 
But all in vain 
I tried my best to be there for you 
I tried my best to cause a change in you 
But all in vain 
I saw you today happy 
So I'm happy for you 
But the doubt slowly got to me 
The doubt that you deserved those silent crys 
The silent droplets on my pillow  
There's no doubt that I love you 
And i really...

i have questions

crying out loud 
i feel lost 
everything i knew 
happened to be a lie 
i have questions 
but no one knows the answer i look at everyone 
but all i see are people hidden behind masks 
i have questions 
but who will answer them 
i find no one in this big big world 

The need to run

Sick and tired of having to run 
Waiting for the moment to have this all done 
Why do the tears come when you don't want them 
Sick and tired of this luck 
Stuck with people who I love 
Yet why do I feel the need to leave 
I love you all dear friends 

Fix Us, Please

Life as I knew it has changed  
The us that we were aged and strained
And all that is left is pain and sorrow
It pains me to remember what we once were
But no on seems to care
anymore 
I feel like I'm the only one who dares
Think of the past and start to burn 
What did we do to us? 
To what extent will this last?
She blames this one 
The other blames that one 
While I sit and blame myself
Let me tell you one thing
You will fix what you broke 
Because it's not your choice
Bear the pain and the ache 
Because I'm really tired of fixing you a glare
You don't get to choose what is best 
Nor do you get to choose to move on and take a rest
When I chose to leave this time last year
No one cared 
No one dared to let me leave
Courtesy of me 
Therefore...

Fix Us, Please

Life as I knew is has changed  
The us that we were aged and strained
And all that is left is pain and sorrow
It pains me to remember what we one were
But no on seems to care
anymore 
I feel like I'm the only one who dares
Think of the past and start to burn 
What did we do to us? 
To what extent will this last?
She blames this one 
The other blames that one 
While I sit and blame myself
Let me tell you one thing
You will fix what you broke 
Becuase it's not your choice
Bear the pain and the ache 
Because I'm really tired of fixing you a glare
You don't get to choose what is best 
Nor do you get to choose to move on and take a rest
When I chose to live this time last year
No one cared 
No one dared to let me leave
Courtesy of me 
Therefore...

Fix Us, Please

Life as I knew is has changed 
The us that we were aged and strained
And all that is left is pain and sorrow
It pains me to remember what we one were
But no on seems to care
anymore 
I feel like I'm the only one who dares
Think of the past and start to burn 
What did we do to us? 
To what extent will this last?
She blames this one 
The other blames that one 
While I sit and blame myself
Let me tell you one thing
You will fix what you broke 
Becuase it's not your choice
Bear the pain and the ache 
Because I'm really tired of fixing you a glare
You don't get to choose what is best 
Nor do you get to choose to move on and take a rest
When I chose to live this time last year
No one cared 
No one dared to let me leave
Courtesy of me 
Therefore...

There Used To Be An Us

We used to have this trust
so binding and so true 
but one day it all broke through 
and crumpled to the floor, dead
We used to be so tight
like a zipper zipped not quite
but one day we were severed with a saw 
left separated when no one saw
We used to be so perfect 
but one day they got jealous 
and all was through 
There used to be an Us
but they broke us apart 
and left us to fend for ourselves 

25 Words

The Past Should Stay in the Past, Right?

The past crept up on her and she let it slither into her mind and take over, leaving her senseless and oblivious to her surroundings.

Completely Fine

feeling cold 
yet the sun is blazing 
want to be happy 
but not falsely
want to laugh but where is the joke
try to smile why should i 
Then i see you my friend
i want to smile for you 
i want to laugh for you 
and i do 
my body cold and penetrating 
why do i feel this way then 
I question my mental health sometimes 
but i feel completely fine 
 
 

Forgive Me

Drowning I take a breath  
Breath in the air 
Air full of poison
poisoning me and filling me 
I take a step 
Into clouds and fog 
I go fishing in my thoughts
Looking for a solution 
Looking for out 
Friend I find you there 
Waiting for me 
I take your hand in hope 
But I still can't open up 
I still can't speak 
My mouth glued 
My heart shut tight 
Too scared to face the monsters 
Too dead inside to speak of what is inside
My thoughts full of lies i've fed to myself
I starved and been filled with misconceptions
The truths hidden deep in my subconsciousness 
Friend I'm sorry if I wasn't there for you enough 
I was lost in the maze in my head
Consumed by the fuel of lies
Forgive me for lying to you 
Forgive me for not telling you 
I will try I promise
Please forgive me for everything 

Why?

Why do scars never go away 
Even when you have tried a million things they never seem to fade
You try everything and yet they stay like battle scars
Why? 
Is there no other way
Why does fate always want you to do what you don't have to do 
Why? 
Why do you always have to face your deepest darkest fears
Why?
Should I run
Should I stay 
Should I dissapear
Or should I face the scars
Highlight them and show them to the world
Why is everything always stuck inside 
And the point you want to tell those closest
The battle scars sting 
They sting as if in warning 
Warning you of what they will think 
But why?
Why?  
 

Dear Best Friend(s) The past and the present

Dear friend(s)  
I have words to say to you 
All the love and the kindness you've showed me 
All for our sake 
All the hate and the rage that's come between us 
Has turned is into a lake 
Full of sweet mermaids and blissful nights
Dear friend(s) 
I appreciate all that you've done for me 
You helped me see the world outside of my little rock 
You helped me understand how different people are
How magnificently beautiful you and your mind are
Dear friend(s) 
Thank you for everything
I don't want it all to end 
I really wish you the best in life
And hope we meet again soon 
I really hope I meet you on some street 
Where we are alone all alone but with fate
Where I can tell you how special you were to me 
How much you really mean to me 
I really wish you the best 
Because after all you are the best
The best...

Drowning in Confusion

He loves me 
He loves me not  
Does he even have a heart? 
I try so hard to make you notice 
Yet all trials go in vain 
All the crys for attention 
Fall to the ground 
Ask me for anything and it's yours
Yet you still notice not
Sometimes I fear you are blind beyond the glasses you wear
Blinded by your atempts to get her attention 
In vain becuase she doesn't notice
Hopeless we are both 
Each seeking another 
Are you so emotionless as they say 
I would love to unlock your every secret
Learn how to navigate your walls and tear them apart
Beacause I am drowning 
Drowning in confusion 
 
 

I Will

​I saw the sunrise this morning  
I decided I would stand to my words
I will rise up 
I will fight these feelings for you 
I will fight them with all the strength I can muster 
I will stop running and I will face you 
I will apologize to you for the hurt I caused 
I will live my life with no regrets
I will.......No matter how hard this sounds
I will 
Maybe 
I will
Maybe 
Someday 
I will not cower 
I will face the monsters inside 
And we will live side by side 
I will face all the fears inside
I will 
Maybe 
Someday 
I will stop the leak at my eyes 
I will block it 
I will stop shaking 
I will stop fearing you 
Maybe 
Someday 
God knows it will be hard 
And there will be ups and downs
But my life is not here
My life is elsewhere 
I will try to find out where I fit...

What is This Feeling?

For once I happily sang 
Lifted my hands in the air and called out 
Finally 
But just like a high I came down fast
I dropped to the floor in desperation 
"No", I called out "No, don't go yet", I screamed 
But just like always here I go again 
In silence I thrash and shake 
Lost in the fog I can't find the way 
Questions come crashing down
Like thunder they strike
One day I chose this 
Another I chose that 
DO I chose what is safe 
Or what is best 
But what is best
I won' bother with the question mark 
What's the point when you're in the dark 
Music ringing in my ears
But feels like a sound so far away 
What is this mood swing 
What is this change 
Minutes ago I was in ecstasy 
With my friends I was a different person 
Yet I come home and feel so alone 
So lost among the masses 
The...

Dear Best Friend(s) The past and the present

Dear friend(s) 
I have words to say to you 
All the love and the kindness you've showed me 
All for our sake 
All the hate and the rage that's come between us 
Has turned is into a lake 
Full of sweet mermaids and blissful nights
Dear friend(s) 
I appreciate all that you've done for me 
You helped me see the world outside of my little rock 
You helped me understand how different people are
How magnificently beautiful you and your mind are
Dear friend(s) 
Thank you for everything
I don't want it all to end 
I really wish you the best in life
And hope we meet again soon 
I really hope I meet you on some street 
Where we are alone all alone but with fate
Where I can tell you how special you were to me 
How much you really mean to me 
I really wish you the best 
Because after all you are the best
The best...

25 Words

The Past Should Stay in the Past, Right?

The past crept up on her and she let it slither in her mind and take over leaving her senseless and oblivious to her surroundings.

What is Love

Love, what a word
it twists and turns like a sleeping child
is it good is it bad
i hear its painful 
i hear its pleasant
but what is it?
some call it addicting 
some call it a heartbeat 
but how do I know 
is it love is it so 
or is it just a word of show 
I've read that love is blinding
and everlasting 
but does it expire?
you say I love you 
but how do you know its true
how do you speak of a thing so complex
how do you describe a thing so project
oh how confused it makes a person 
what is love?
 

Thoughts and Actions

They always tell us don't talk to strangers
They tell us be nice 
They tell us don't backbite others
But then you catch them at it 
And their excuse is:
She's a bad person 
What is a bad person? 
Is it always the girl who cheated? 
Or a girl who likes to dress in a certain way? 
No wait shes a slut
But if it was a boy 
No she tempted him
He had nothing to do with it 
This world is very sexist and people have to see that 
Dress how you want to, behave the way you want 
As long as you believe deep down that is right
You shouldn't care about what they say 
And yet I do and you do 
but that's wrong and people have to acknowledge that 
He says we are equal 
We are not equal 
Have you ever felt the stares, the judgements, the glares? I ask him 
Have you ever had to...

Confused

My heart jerks at the thought of you  
And every single move is done with you in mind out of true 
And yet my mind knows i'm not the one
And tells me you are made for her 
I know what is good for me 
But for once can I not let go to honesty 
My emotions masked under frustration 
My mind conducting a search for a different fixation 
I know my thoughts should be elsewhere
focusing on the future and not fixing you a glare 
I am confused,confused about what I feel
Is this love or mere appeal
I feel as if I should hate you 
And yet I can't get myself to condemn you 
Sometimes I feel as if I should slap you 
Do you not see her or is it just ignorance that masks you 
I am confused but I refuse to understand 
Too cowardly to see what I fear to understand
I decided to stick to...

Poetry and Spoken Word Competition 2018

Guilt

Its choking me 
Engulfing me in its waves
Leaving me in a dull faze
It is killing me 
After all these years its filling me 
Its the reason to all this distrust, all this hate
I'm on the cold floor prostrate
Why wont it let me be?
A slave to its pleasures
like a victim to its master 
Everyday taking me down faster
Over the years I've had to take measures
Freeing the thoughts that could remind me 
kidnapping happier ones with desperation
Oh how they've filled me with sensations
I plastered on a new face carefree
A new masterpiece state-of-the-art
Deleting the old file
Begging it to leave me for awhile
All along a nagging feeling tearing me apart
Tore me up and left me beg
Choking up on the flooring
Why did it always have to interrupt the healing? 
Why do I always have to be left reeling? 
Pealing away at memories of olden times 
I tried to find...

Poetry and Spoken Word Competition 2018

Guilt

Its choking me 
Engulfing me in its waves
Leaving me in a dull faze
It is killing me 
After all these years its filling me 
Its the reason to all this distrust, all this hate
I'm on the cold floor prostrate
Why wont it let me be?
A slave to its pleasures
like a victim to its master 
Everyday taking me down faster
Over the years I've had to take measures
Freeing the thoughts that could remind me 
kidnapping happier ones with desperation
Oh how they've filled me with sensations
I plastered on a new face carefree
A new masterpiece state-of-the-art
Deleting the old file
Begging it to leave me for awhile
All along a nagging feeling tearing me apart
Tore me up and left me beg
Choking up on the flooring
Why did it always have to interrupt the healing? 
Why do I always have to be left reeling? 
Pealing away at memories of olden times 
I tried to find...

Poetry and Spoken Word Competition 2018

Guilt

Its choking me 
Engulfing me in its waves
Leaving me in a dull faze
It is killing me 
After all these years its filling me 
Its the reason to all this distrust, all this hate
I'm on the cold floor prostrate
Why wont it let me be?
A slave to its pleasures
A victim to its master 
Everyday taking me down faster
Over the years I've had to take measures
Freeing the thoughts that could remind me 
kidnapping happier merrier ones
Oh how they've given me pleasures
I plastered on a new face
A new package complete with a laugh and a smile
Deleting the old file 
I told it to give me space
All along a nagging feeling 
tore me up and left me begging 
choking up on the flooring
Why did it have to interrupt the healing? 
Why do I always have to be left reeling? 
Pealing away at old memories 
I tried to find a cause to all...

How To Conjure A Book

A tear stained pillow
Soaked with lies and ambition
A pair of worn out shoes
Tired of hoping
Scared of the morning
Birds singing happily
Babies lying peacefully
Girls hiding their insecurities
Under coats of maturities
Truths untold
Lies out bold
Let me tell you a little story
Once upon a time
There were three creature in their primes
It took to the mines
In hopes of finding its prize
One creature took her pillow
And turned it to a thriller
Another took her shoes
Turning them to clues
And one took their voices
Turning them into choices
And finally kidnapping the babies
They turned them into ladies
Now what’s left is the pages
The creatures gathered in a circle
Full half of certain and more of purpose
They conjured a spine of magic
And pages made of classic
They made characters of fashion
And some full of passion
They made a plot out of romance
Then came the climax ...

Why Won't You Love Me?

My tear stained pillow
Soaked with lies and ambition
My worn out shoes
Tired of hoping 
Scared of the morning
Birds singing happily
While I rid my eyes of unhappiness
Puffy eyed with hate
Scared  of your every answer
 Ready to face the world of misconception
Ready to be who I'm not
About to meet my friends and lie
About all of my miserable lies
Oh life why do you treat me so
Make me want to bury a hole and .....
When will you say yes in pride
Proud of who I am and what I've become
I am tired of all your woes
The complaints and the arguements
Tired of having to change for your sake 
I am who I am so be it
Yet why am I so scared to say it
SO many thoughts in my head
So hard to take action
So hard to make you stop
Why do you pain me with memeories
Stabbing...

Why Won't You Love Me?

My tear stained pillow
Soaked with lies and ambition
My worn out shoes
Tired of hoping 
Scared of the morning
Birds singing happily
While I rid my eyes of unhappiness
Puffy eyed with hate
Scared  of your every answer
 Ready to face the world of misconception
Ready to be who I'm not
About to meet my friends and lie
About all of my miserable lies
Oh life why do you treat me so
Make me want to bury a hole and .....
When will you say yes in pride
Proud of who I am and what I've become
I am tired of all your woes
The complaints and the arguements
Tired of having to change for your sake 
I am who I am so be it
Yet why am I so scared to say it
SO many thoughts in my head
So hard to take action
So hard to make you stop
Why do pain me with memeories
Stabbing me...

What is Love

Love, what a word
it twists and turns like a sleeping child
is it good is it bad
i hear its painful 
i hea its pleasant
but what is it?
some call it addicting 
some call it a heartbeat 
but how do  I know 
is it love is it so 
or is it just a word of show 
I've read that love is blinding
and everlasting 
but does it expire?
you say I love you 
but how do you know its true
how do you speak of a thing so complex
how do you describe a thing so project
oh how confused it makes a person 
what is love?
 

Everyday

Because of you
I have to face thousands of questions 
because of you 
my heart has broken a thousand times
because of you 
I've shed a thousand tears 
In hopes that you might someday understand
every single time you say no I hope 
and every time I come back with more 
to find myself with a heart broke 
tell my why you do this 
I know you want the best for me 
but don't I get a say 
In what's best for me 
I swear you don't know 
what I have to face every day 
 

An Ode To Books

Addicted
To you I'm addicted
You make me feel so fine
If a little divine
In your pages I'm caught 
With your characters I fought 
Oh but I'm jealous not 
I wish you could....
I hope....
I would love it if.......if......f...

If you could.........could 
If you could only hold me
Entangle me in your problems
Tie me up in your mysteries
Wound me around your suspense
Choke me with your drama
Kiss me with your romance
Soak me in your horrors
Chase me with your thrillers
If only.............
Why could I not choose 
Which life to persue
Which morals to live by 
Which road to take
Which emotions to choose
But regardless I am still addicted
Addicted to you forever and always 

Acrostic Verse

Faint

Feeling lesser
As If forever
If a little remote
Not well so I wrote 
The song of my life 

Monostich

Cradle Me

Life, when will you embrace me in your arms? 
 

Truly Exquisite

What does it mean to be pretty? 
Is it clothes, makeup, or shoes?
What does it mean to be beautiful?
Is it manicured fingers and salon done hair?
I don't think so 
To be pretty is to be kind 
To be pretty is to be sweet 
To be pretty is to be honest 
To be pretty is to be loyal
To be pretty is to be compassionate
To be pretty is to be fair
To be pretty is to be humble
To be beautiful is to kill'em with kindness
To be beautiful is it choke'em with your sweetness
To be beautiful is to be so honest it hurts
To be beautiful is to drown them with your loyalty
To be beautiful is to hang them with a rope of compassion 
To be beautiful is to be so fair that they guilt
To be beautiful is to slap them with your humbleness
That is what it means to be truly exquisite 

 

Hurtin

Broken into pieces  
why are you doing this to me 
why cant i tell you 
how i feel 
shattered into smithereens
why wont you let me free
i need out 
let me out 
you made me hurt 
you taught me how to hide 
myself 
my feelings 
my hurt 
I smile to your face 
i laugh at jokes
i dont understand 
how can you not tell 
that im hurting inside 
that im broken 
that i need a hug 
i want you to know 
and yet i dont 
tell me why I won't tell you 
You don't have to 
I don't deserve you 

I'm Sorry

What is this feeling? 
That's left me kneeling
What is this mood? 
That's made me so rude
I'm sorry if I hurt you 
Be patient with me I'm feeling a bit blue
Split into two 
I'm sorry but you have no clue


 

I'm Sorry

What is this feeling? 
That's left me kneeling
What is this moood? 
That's made me so rude
I'm sorry if I hurt you 
Be patient with me I'm feeling a bit blue
Split into two 
I'm sorry but you have no clue


 

Op-Ed Competition 2018

Why Do We Judge?

Stare me up and down 
I can see the screws twisting in your head
Judging me aren't you? 
Filled with curiosity I want to ask:
Where do you think I'm from?
How old do you think I am?
Very anxsiously I want to know
Have you came to a conclusion, am I good or bad?
Trustworthy or a waste of time?
A lady or a beggar from town? 
Do I have hair under my scarf?
Or am I bald like all the rest?
You roll your eyes and fix me a piteous glare
Did my father force me in all these clothes?
Am I legal or just a foe?
Why am I wearing so much clothes?
But why do you judge
Why do you need the answer to all these questions
You pull your kids behind you as if to shield them from evil 
But what makes me evil? 
Why aren't you evil? 
And the biggest question of all
Why...

Thoughts and Actions

They always tell us don't talk to strangers
They tell us be nice 
They tell us don't talk about others
But then you catch them at it 
And their excuse is:
Shes a bad person 
What is a bad person? 
Is it always a girl who cheated? 
Or a girl who likes to dress in a certain way? 
No wait shes a slut
But if it was a boy 
No she tempted him
He had nothing to do with it 
This world is very sexist and people have to see that 
Dress how you want to, behave the way you want 
As long as you believe deep down that is right
You shouldn't care about what they say 
And yet I do and you do 
but that's wrong and people have to acknowledge that 
He says we are equal 
We are not equal 
Have you ever felt the stares, the judgements, the glares? I ask him 
Have you ever had...

Here

Tell me 
why are you sad 
i am here for you 
yet you dont realize 
i try to tell poeple but they dont listen 
i will listen if you are willing to tell
an ear open to all 
at the same time 
the friends who call themselves friends
cant see when i'm breaking 
I've gotten so well at hiding 
and wearing a face oblivious to everything inside
and yet i am willing to listen 
i am here for the tears 
cry them out my dear that is the only way 
and breathe
i am here    

Guilt

Its choking me 
Engulfing me in its waves
Leaving me in a dull faze
It is killing me 
After all these years its filling me 
Its the reason to all this distrust, all this hate
I'm on the cold floor prostrate
Why wont it let me be?
A slave to its pleasures
A victim to its master 
Everyday taking me down faster
Over the years I've had to take measures
Freeing the thoughts that could remind me 
kidnapping happier merrier ones
Oh how they've given me pleasures
I plastered on a new face
A new package complete with a laugh and a smile
Deleting the old file 
I told it to give me space
All along a nagging feeling 
tore me up and left me begging 
choking up on the flooring
Why did it have to interrupt the healing? 
Why do I always have to be left reeling? 
Pealing away at old memories 
I tried to find a cause to all...

Monster Flash Fiction Competition 2018

Life Before It

I woke up foggy eyed and glanced at the alarm clock next to my bed, it read 10 a.m. Strange, I thought to myself, I don't remember closing the alarm or snoozing. I got up groggily and walked the few steps to the bathroom. I glanced at my reflection in the mirror and was shocked. I don't remember putting makeup on nor going to sleep in it. A shocking realization dawned me, I must've been drunk but I later realized it was much worse. I brushed my teeth and combed my hair when I heard a noise from behind the shower curtain. It was a pattering noise as if someone forgot the water on. I briskly opened the curtain and glanced down. Heavens above, there was blood  dripping on the floor of the tub. My heart beat fast and I slowly glanced up. A man swaying by a rope with his head detached halfway was hanging from the ceiling. I...

Friendship Tweet

Friends?

Friendship means trust, loyalty, honesty, and hope. It means loving your friend no matter what they are going through or keeping from you.

Monster Flash Fiction Competition 2018

Life Before It

I woke up foggy eyed and glanced at the alarm clock next to my bed, it read 10 a.m. Strange, I thought to myself, I don't remember closing the alarm or snoozing. I got up groggily and walked the few steps to the bathroom. I glanced at my reflection in the mirror and was shocked. I don't remember putting makeup on nor going to sleep in it. A shocking realization dawned me, I must've been drunk but I later realized it was much worse. I brushed my teeth and combed my hair when I heard a noise from behind the shower curtain. It was a pattering noise as if someone forgot the water on. I briskly opened the curtain and glanced down. Heavens above, there was blood  dripping on the floor of the tub. My heart beat fast and I slowly glanced up. A man swaying by a rope with his head detached halfway was hanging from the ceiling. I...

Friendship Tweet

Friends?

To me, Friendship means trust, loyalty, honesty, and hope. 

Monster Flash Fiction Competition 2018

Life Before It

I woke up foggy eyed and glanced at the alarm clock next to my bed, it read 10 a.m. Strange, I thought to myself, I don't remember closing the alarm or snoozing. I got up groggily and walked the few steps to the bathroom. I glanced at my reflection in the mirror and was shocked. I don't remember putting makeup on nor going to sleep in it. A shocking realization dawned me, I must've been drunk. I brushed my teeth and combed my hair when I heard a noise from behind the shower curtain. It was a pattering noise as if someone forgot the water on. I briskly opened the curtain and glanced down. Heavens above, there was blood  dripping on the floor of the tub. My heart beat fast and I slowly glanced up. A man swaying by a rope with his head detached halfway was hanging from the ceiling. I didn't know whether to scream or the run...

Monster Flash Fiction Competition 2018

Life Before It

I woke up foggy eyed and glanced at the alarm clock next to my bed, it read 10 a.m. Strange, I thought to myself, I don't remember closing the alarm or snoozing. I got up groggily and walked the few steps to the bathroom. I glanced at my reflection in the mirror and was shocked. I don't remember putting makeup on nor going to sleep in it. A shocking realization dawned me, I must've been drunk. I brushed my teeth and combed my hair when I heard a noise from behind the shower curtain. It was a pattering noise as if someone forgot the water on. I briskly opened the curtain and glanced down. Heavens above, there was blood  dripping on the floor of the tub. My heart beat fast and I slowly glanced up. A man swaying by a rope with his head detached halfway was hanging from the ceiling. I didn't know whether to scream or the run...

Love in 13 Words

What is It?

Recognized it but too stubborn to act upon it, I named it Love.

The Brag

Victory is mine I hit the grand slam
sworn into presidency I will never forget 
the day my mother and brother left
Inferior to the British I will not be 
The occupants of this land 
Obliterated they shall be
forget my woes forget my sorrows
lets talk about how incredible I am though
winning isn't everything winning is the only thing
Losing killed me in 1824
I vow to advance ahead and take action
Adams shall regret the the day he participated in the corrupt bargain 
protected man, protected the states
the death of my wife never forgotten
Woe unto you who beleives that from the past 
I will be the poeples president 
we will be victorious 
we will have a legacy 

Can People Change?

As Claire was walking home a scary thought crossed her mind. If she were to die this instant, has she done enough things in life worth calling it an ending? This was her inspiration and from that day on everything she did, she did with the thought of death on her mind. She smiled at strangers, even helped a old lady cross the street. Before today she wouldn't have even have thought of speaking to her. Claire was a changed person. She helped her mom and did her chores without the usual complaints. Claire started noticing how beautiful her surroundings were. She noticed how the light caught on the surface of a leaf, tinting the leaf orange. Would we change the same way? Does it really take death to change or can we just switch on our good side permanently? As you follow through your day, ask yourself "Would I have done this if I knew I was going to...

Living (might change the title) (1)

She pulled out a knife and held his arm behind his back and said "Who are you and what are you doing here?". He was speechless, the last time James had seen his sister Alexa was when she was a mere child and now she was so grown up and oh wait had a knife to his throat. "Alexa stop this , it's me James do you not remember me telling you I will come back someday." Alexa loosened her grip but still help him tight, "Prove it" she said with an air of disbelief. James grabs her loosened arm and swiftly takes the knife from her "remember student, who your teacher is ,but I must say you've been practicing Lex." A smile forms on Alexas face when she hears her big brothers nickname for her "James ,it's actually you" and she jumps on him in a form of a hug. "Where have you been, do you know how worried...

Living (might change the title) (1)

She pulled out a knife and held his arm behind his back and said "Who are you and what are you doing here?". He was speechless, the last time James had seen his sister Alexa was when she was a mere child and now she was so grown up and oh wait had a knife to his throat. "Alexa stop this , it's me James do you not remember me telling you I will come back someday." Alexa loosened her grip but still help him tight, "Prove it" she said with an air of disbelief. James grabs her loosened arm and swiftly takes the knife from her "remember student, who your teacher is ,but I must say you've been practicing Lex." A smile forms on Alexas face when she hears her big brothers nickname for her "James ,it's actually you" and she jumps on him in a form of a hug. "Where have you been, do you know how worried...

The MostDangerousWriting App

Have you ever had the trouble of finding words and inspiration and maybe a little bit of a push? Well, if you have check out the webstite below. If you stop writing all progress is lost. Challenge yourself =)
The MostDangerousWriting App
http://www.themostdangerouswritingapp.com/

Can People Change?

As Claire was walking home, a scary thought crossed her mind. If she were to die this instant, has she do enough things in life worth calling it an ending. This was her inspiration and from that day on everything she did, she did with the thought of death on her mind. She smiled at strangers, even helped a old lady cross the street. Before today she would've even have thought of speaking to her. Claire was a changed person. She helped her mom and did her chores without the usual complaints. Claire started noticing how beautiful her surroundings were. She noticed how the light caught on the surface of a leaf tinting the leaf orange. Would we change the same way? Does it really take death to change or can we just switch on our good side permanently? As you follow through your day ask yourself would I have done this if I knew I was going to die...

Can People Change?

As Claire was walking home, a scary thought crossed her mind. If she were to die this instant, has she do enough things in life worth calling it an ending. This was her inspiration and from that day on everything she did, she did with the thought of death on her mind. She smiled at strangers, even helped a old lady cross the street. Before today she would've even have thought of speaking to her. Claire was a changed person. She helped her mom and did her chores without the usual complaints. Claire started noticing how beautiful her surroundings were. She noticed how the light caught on the surface of a leaf tinting the leaf orange. Would we change the same way? Does it really take death to change or can we just switch on our good side permanently? As you follow through your day ask yourself would I have done this if I knew I was going to die...

Can People Change?

As Claire was walking home , a scary thought crossed her mind. If she were to die this instant, did she do enough things in life. This was her inspiration and from that day on everything she did, she did with the thought of death on her mind. She smiled at strangers, even helped a old lady cross the street. Before today she would've even have thought of speaking to her. Claire was a changed person. She helped her mom and did her chores without the usual complaints. Claire started noticing how beautiful her surroundings were. She noticed how the light caught on the surface of a leaf tinting the leaf orange. Would we change the same way? Does it really take death to change or can we just switch on our good side? As you follow through your day ask yourself would I have done this if I knew I was going to die this evening. I tried doing...

If Only.....(2)

Long story short, all the Harry Potter movies we watched didn't do justice to the real thing. We walked through those walls and walked into a world identical to ours but the air smelled fresher and the everything looked brighter and sharper in image. It was like walking into a 4k video game except for real. I also found out that you didn't have to take a train to Hogwarts you just have to walk through the platform 9 3/4 and you are at the doorstep. Olivia looked at me and then at the wall, and pushed me through. At first I thought she was trying to get rid of me then I realized what was happening. I was supped to go through and in a moments notice I was on the other side. Olivia came through shortly after and then nodded as if agreeing with herself. "you know, muggles aren't supposed to be able to get through the wall,...

If Only......(1)

 Have you ever wondered, what are they thinking? Well let's just say I wonder that a lot. I happened to be walking in the streets of god knows where when I saw Them. They were walking on the street opposite me in a group and little did they interact with each other and I thought if only I could hear what They're thinking. And I did. I heard everyone, old men, little boys, children, and everyone else. It was amazing and terrifying. Then I heard Them. Girl in purple shirt:Ugh what is she wearing, she could go to the mall(referring to another girl). Boy in black:God I'm so sick and tired of her, I wish I could break up with her(probably referring to girlfriend). She is so embarrassing in public. Then in heard her. Girl in pink(and lets just say the most makeup): I am so tired of this made up life, I wish I could go back to Hogwarts...

If Only.....(2)

Long story short, all the Harry Potter movies we watched didn't do justice to the real thing. We walked through those walls and walked into a world identical to ours but the air smelled fresher and the everything looked brighter and sharper in image. It was like walking into a 4k video game except for real. I also found out that you didn't have to take a train to Hogwarts you just have to walk through the platform 9 3/4 and you are at the doorstep. Olivia looked at me and then at the wall, and pushed me through. At first I thought she was trying to get rid of me then I realized what was happening. I was supped to go through and in a moments notice I was on the other side. Olivia came through shortly after and then nodded as if agreeing with herself. "you know, muggles aren't supposed to be able to get through the wall,...

If Only......(1)

 Have you ever wondered, what are they thinking? Well let's just say I wonder that a lot. I happened to be walking in the streets of god knows where when I saw Them. They were walking on the street opposite me in a group and little did they interact with each other and I thought if only I could hear what They're thinking. And I did. I heard everyone, old men, little boys, children, and everyone else. It was amazing and terrifying. Then I heard Them. Girl in purple shirt:Ugh what is she wearing, she could go to the mall(referring to another girl). Boy in black:God I'm so sick and tired of her, I wish I could break up with her(probably referring to girlfriend). She is so embarrassing in public. Then in heard her. Girl in pink(and lets just say the most makeup): I am so tired of this made up life, I wish I could go back to Hogwarts...

If Only.....(2)

Long story short, all the Harry Potter movies we watched didn't do justice to the real thing. We walked through those walls and walked into a world identical to ours but the air smelled fresher and the everything looked brighter and sharper in image. It was like walking into a 4k video game except for real. I also foud out that you didnt have to take a train to Hogwarts you just have to walk through the platform 9 3/4 and you are at the doorstep. Olivia looked at me and then at the wall, and pushed me through. At first I thought she was trying to get rid of me then I realized what was happening. I was supped to go through and in a moments notice I was on the other side. Olivia came through shortly after and then nodded as if agreeing with herself. "you know, muggles aren't supposed to be able to get through the wall,...

If Only......(1)

 Have you ever wondered, what are they thinking? Well let's just say I wonder that a lot. I happened to be walking in the streets of god knows where when I saw Them. They were walking on the street opposite me in a group and little did they interact with each other and I thought if only I could hear what They're thinking. And I did. I heard everyone, old men, little boys, children, and everyone else. It was amazing and terrifying. Then I heard Them. Girl in purple shirt:Ugh what is she wearing, she could go to the mall(referring to another girl). Boy in black:God I'm so sick and tired of her, I wish I could break up with her(probably referring to girlfriend). She is so embarrassing in public. Then in heard her. Girl in pink(and lets just say the most makeup): I am so tired of this made up life, I wish I could go back to Hogwarts...

What is Love

Love, what a word
it twists and turns like a sleeping child
is it good is it bad
i heard its painful 
i hear its pleasant
but what is it?
some call it addicting 
some call it a heartbeat 
but how do  I know 
is it love is it so 
or is it just a word people say 
I've read that love is blinding
and everlasting 
but does it expire?
you say I love you 
but how do you know its true
how do you speak of a thing so complex
how do you describe a thing so complicated
oh how confused it makes a person 
what is love?
 

10 Things I Love

1. Chocolate
2. Books
3. Teddy Bears
4. Pizza
5. Spaghetti
6. Ice Cream 
7. Cars (my permit)
8. Weddings
9. Make-up (more as a art then for use)
10. Did I mention Books 

Help!.... It's Homework

Help!
It's homework time 
time to forget everything and put it aside
becuase it's homework time
frustration,
grief, 
sorrow, 
feelings start to awake
from a slumber called a break
resistance starts to rise from within 
to do or not to do 
then resolution 
it will be over fast
memories tumble in as if from afar
words spoken by my teacher
words jumbled together 
what a mess!
facts from the past
opinions and jokes 
oh homework 
is it finished, is it over? 
yes finally
"The past is in the past"(Elsa) 
LOL what a joke 

Help!.... It's Homework

Help!
It's hmework time 
time to forget everything and put it aside
becuase it's homework time
frustration,
grief, 
sorrow, 
feelings start to shake 
resistance starts to rise from within 
to do or not to do 
then resolution 
it will be over fast
memories tumble in as if from afar
words spoken by my teacher
words jumbled together 
what a mess!
facts from the past
opinions and jokes 
oh homework 
is it finished, is it over? 
yes finally
"The past is in the past"(Elsa) 
LOL what a joke 

Click :1: Error Error Your Server is Down

1.
I felt it approaching long before I saw it. I didn't know whether to call it a he or a she but it was big and size and tall in height. It had a very brooding look about it but my instincts told me it was here to help and not to harm. As you've probably guessed, I'm in a very terrible predicament. I have outsmarted the world's best computer programmers and hacked into ACE, the world's largest gaming server. Then to make matters worse, (not to brag or anything) I taunted the maker of the server.  In case your thinking, "hey that's not so bad", the maker of the server happens to be the one and only Mr. Allister C. Ealing. This man is not only the wealthiest man on earth, he also created our world as we know it. 
    

Click :1: Error Error Your Server is Down

1.
I felt it approaching long before I saw it. I didn't know whether to call it a he or a she but it was big and size and tall and height. It had a very brooding look about it but my instincts told me it was here to help and not to harm. As you've probably guessed, i'm in a very terrible predicament. I have outsmarted the world's best computer programmers and hacked into ACE, the world's largest gaming server. Then to make matters worse, (not to brag or anything) I taunted the makers of the server.  In case your thinking, "hey that's not so bad", the maker of the server happens to be the one and only Mr. Allister C. Ealing. This man is not only the wealthiest man on earth, he also created our world as we know it. 
    

What a Bore

What to do?
So much time and yet so little 
to do 
What to do 
when the sun is shining 
and the TV streaming
What to do 
when the sink is full 
and the room messy 
what to do 
when the books are stacked
so much to choose from 
so much lives
so much opportunities
i have found it 
i shall read
but which one?
Mysteries, murders
Love, romance
Thrillers, suspence 
I have chosen
All
 

Ten Words to You

Home

The deep south, were color is brighter and warmer.

Perfect

So perfect
for each other
yet you try to hide behind closed doors
not realizing all that is yours
if given the chance you could be perfect
for each other

how proud i am for you 
finding the one yet so young
give him a chnace you never know 
people can change people can grow 
you are blinded by the ignorance you call right and wrong
he could slip through your fingers before long

give it a thought give it a chance 
you never know were true love stands
i can see it in his looks 
in the eyes he hides behind
love so strong and yet so shaky
hurry, hurry 
don't let him go 
I know you want him though 

give him a day give him a second 
he will win you over for love beckons
you can change the ignorance to charm 
he longs for it your love your consent
give him a chance 
you are perfect your...

Perfect

So perfect
for each other
yet you try to hide behind closed doors
not realizing all that is yours
if given the chance you could be perfect
for each other

how proud i am for you 
finding the one yet so young
give him a chnace you never know 
people can change people can grow 
you are blinded by the ignorance you call right and wrong
he could slip through your fingers before long

give it a thought give it a chance 
you never know were true love stands
i can see it in his looks 
in the eyes he hides in 
love so strong and yet so weak 
hurry, hurry 
don't let him go 
I know you want him though 

give him a day give him a second 
he will win you over for love beckons
you can change the ignorance to charm 
he longs for it your love your consent
give him a chance 
you are perfect your...

Perfect

So perfect
for each other
yet you try to hide behind closed doors
not realizing all that is yours
if given the chance you could be perfect
for each other

how proud i am for you 
finding the one yet so young
give him a chnace you never know 
people can change people can grow 
you are blinded by the ignorance you call right and wrong
he could slip through your fingers before long

give it a thought give it a chance 
you never know were true love stands
i can see it in his looks 
in the eyes he hides in 
love so strong and yet so weak 
hurry, hurry 
don't let him go 
I know you want him though 

give him a day give him a second 
he will win you over for love beckons
you can change the ignorance to charm 
he longs for it your love your consent
give him a chance 
you are perfect your...

Finals

To fail 
or not to fail 
is the question this week 
qeustions questions 
study study hard
don't forget this 
don't forget that
no free time for you you have finals 
forget the phone 
forget the TV
focus focus 
don't forget 
GPA GPA 
your life your future
read read 
momorize 
study study 
the question is
to fail?
or not to fail?

My December Competition 2017

Snow Day

   It is not very common that we southerners receive snow. To put it more accurately, we don't get the snow that you can throw snowballs with and build snowmen. Quite the contrary, all we get is a day off of school. Just to make it clear I am not complaining! One December afternoon the mornings were chilly and afternoons even chillier. My brothers and I woke up and got ready for school as usual, my dad warned us that there was about 30 or 40 percent chance of snow. He repeatedly told us that we should wear layers but as usual, stubborn me didn't listen, as usual. When I got out of bed that morning I did not have the slightest idea that I would not be sleeping in my bed that night.
   We were on our way to school and as usual traffic was, traffic and we got to school late. The first two periods were over quickly and...

The Fall Chapter 1

You run, run as fast as your feet can carry you 
the leaves were breaking under your feet
they are chasing you, gaining up on you 
you couldn't run fast enough 
how could you think with such short breath and aching feet
you find a way suddenly you turn to as right 
you almost hit into a tree but know better
you start climbing the tree fast 
you slip and fall
luckily your head hits some leaves but your foot was not so lucky 
it slammed into a rock 
your head was throbbing and blood appeared at your ankle
you take your ankle in your hands and try to stop the blood with some softer leaves
it doesn't work so you rip off some of your shirt and rap your ankle in it 
you start to feel hunger creeping into your stomach at least they're off your tail fro a while you say to yourself 
now what you think 
your...

My December Competition 2017

Snow Day

    It is not very common that we southerners receive snow. To put it more accurately we don't get the snow that you can throw snowballs with and build snowmans. Quite the contrary, all we get is a day off of school. Just to make it clear I am not complaining! One December afternoon the mornings were chilly and afternoons even chillier. My brothers and I woke up in the morning and got ready for school as usual, my dad warned us that there was about 30 or 40 percent chance of snow so we should wear layers but as usual, stubborn me didn't listen, as usual. When I got out of bed that morning I did not have the slightest idea that I would not be sleeping in my bed that night. 
    We were on our way to school and as usual traffic was, traffic and we got to school late. The first two periods were over quickly...

My December Competition 2017

Snow Day

    It is not very common that we southerners receive snow. To put it more accurately we don't get the snow that you can throw snowballs with and build snowmans. Quite the contrary, all we get is a day off of school. Just to make it clear I am not complaining! One December afternoon the mornings were chilly and afternoons even chillier. My brothers and I woke up in the morning and got ready for school as usual, my dad warned us that there was about 30 or 40 percent chance of snow so we should wear layers but as usual, stubborn me didn't listen, as usual. When I got out of bed that morning I did not have the slightest idea that I would not be sleeping in my bed that night. 
    We were on our way to school and as usual traffic was, traffic and we got to school late. My brothers and I separated as each...

My December Competition 2017

Snow Day

    It is not very common that we southerners receive snow. To put it more accurately we don't get the snow that you can throw snowballs with and build snowmans. Quite the contrary, all we get is a day off of school. Just to make it clear I am not complaining! One December afternoon the mornings were chilly and afternoons even chillier. My brothers and I woke up in the morning and got ready for school as usual, my dad warned us that there was about 30 or 40 percent chance of snow so we should wear layers but as usual, stubborn me didn't listen, as usual. When I got out of bed that morning I did not have the slightest idea that I would not be sleeping in my bed that night. 
    We were on our way to school and as usual traffic was, traffic and we got to school late. My brothers and I separated as each...

Identity Theft

She didn't have a say. It was taken from her faster than she can roll her eyes and she was one heck of an eye roller.  They strapped her to a bed and machines were quickly connected to her head. They discovered how to take her memory and everything with it but were still deciding on how to use this. She was the first, the experiment. They realized that she knew too much so her identity was the cost. No one asked her if she willingly would do it, they just stuck a needle in her arm and she drifted off to sleep. She woke up frantically looking around but couldn't get up. She was cuffed to the bed which felt like a table if they asked her. The doctor came and after looking closely he seemed to have no emotion in his eyes .The rest of his face was covered so she couldn't tell who he was. He looked...

My December Competition 2017

Snow Day

    It is not very common that us southerners receive snow. To put it more accurately we don't get the snow that you can throw snowballs with and build snowmans quite the contrary, all we get is a day off school. Just to make it clear I am not complaining. It happened one December afternoon when the mornings were chilly and afternoons even chillier. My brothers and I woke up in the morning and got ready for school as usual, my dad warns us that there is about 30 or 40 percent chance of snow so we should wear layers but, stubborn me didnt listen, as usual. When I got out of bed that morning I did not have the slightest idea that I would not be sleeping in my bed that night. 

    

    

My December Competition 2017

Snow Day

It is not very common that us southerners receive snow. To put it more accurately we don't get the snow that you can throw snowballs with and build snowmans quite the contrary, all we get is a day off school. Just to make it clear I am not complaining. It happened one December afternoon when the mornings were chilly and afternoons even chillier. My brothers and I woke up in the morning and got ready for school as usual, my dad warns us that there is about 30 or 40 percent chance of snow so we should wear layers. When i got out of bed that morning I did not have the slightest idea that I would not be sleeping in my bed that night.

Thoughts and Actions

they always tell us don't talk to strangers
they tell us be nice 
they tell us dont talk about others
but then you catch them at it 
and their excuse is; shes a bad person 
what is a bad person 
is it always a girl who cheated 
or a girl who likes to dress in a certain way 
no wait shes a slut
but if it was a boy 
no she tempted him
he had nothing to do with it 
this world is very sexist and people have to see that 
dress how you want to, behave the way you want 
as long as you beleive deep down that is right
you shouldn't care about what they say 
and yet i do and you do 
but thats wrong and people have to acknowledge that 
 

I Wonder

I Wonder
Before you taunted her 
did you ask why she is that way 
did you give her a chance to explain 
before you pushed her 
did you stop and ask yourself 
what if she has somewhere to be
what if she is in pain 
before you laughed at her 
did you know she has mental issues
did you even ask yourself what that could do to her
before you bullied her 
did you know she will get cancer 
did you know her self esteem is part of the reason why 
before you wished her gone
did you know that she will die 
did you know that you will go crawling trying to apologize
did you know that it would be too late 
i have been there dear reader and my friend has died of cancer at 15, i just want to say before you do anything think, just think 

My December Competition 2017

Snow Day

It is not very common that us southerners receive snow, to put it more accurately the snow that you can throw snowballs with and build snowman quite the contrary all we get is a day off school. Just to make it clear i am not complaining. It happened one December afternoon when the mornings were chilly and afternoons even chillier. Me and my brothers woke up in the morning and got ready for school as usual, my dad warns us that there is about 30 or 40% chance of snow so we should wear layers. When i got out of bed that morning i did not have the slightest idea that i would not be sleeping in my bed that night.

If Only......(1)

They gave me a stone and told me that i could use it and wish for anything but only three wishes. I took the stone in my hand and looked at it, it seemed normal so i decided to try it out. I wished for wings. Nothing happened but that wasn't surprising we are in the twenty first century after all. I slipped the stone in my pocket and walked home. When i got home my parents and little sister were at the dinner table. I went and sat and felt an urge to scratch my back as soon as it came in contact with the chair but i left it ignored. We ate dinner as normal and as i finished and was walking upstairs i felt my shirt ripping in the back. I ran hurriedly to the bathroom connecting me and my sisters room and looked at my back in the mirror. At my horror there were wings with...

Identity Theft

She didn't have a say. It was taken from her faster than she can roll her eyes and she was one heck of an eye roller.  They strapped her to a bed and machines were quickly connected to her head. They discovered how to take her memory and everything with it but were still deciding on how to use this. She was the first, the experiment. They realized that she knew too much so her identity was the cost. No one asked her if she willingly would do it, they just stuck a needle in her arm and she drifted off to sleep. She woke up frantically looking around but couldnt get up. She was cuffed to the bed which felt like a table if they asked her. The doctor came and after looking closely he seemed to have no emotion in his eyes .The rest of his face was covered so she couldn't tell who he was. He looked...

Setting as Mood

Notice

The thing about Sandra, is that she is no ordinary girl. She was a girl who had fought through wars inside her head trying to find her identity. She is a hero of her own kind, that had emotions well hidden. She never knew that her noticed and that he was slowly getting to know her from afar. He noticed the way she flinched when she heard the words mom and dad, and the way she always sat alone at lunch. He noticed her persistence to get good grades and the way she always helped those who needed it. Most of all he noticed how she wouldn't accept help from others and would never display her emotions. After all i would know, it takes one to know one except i wish there was that person who noticed.  

Thoughts and Actions

they always tell us dont talk to strangers
they tell us be nice 
they tell us dont talk about others
but then you catch them at it 
and their excuse is; shes a bad person 
what is a bad person 
is it always a girl who cheated 
or a girl who likes to dress in a certain way 
no wait shes a slut
but if it was a boy 
no she tempted him
he had nothing to do with it 
this world is very sexist and people have to see that 
dress how you want to, behave the way you want 
as long as you beleive deep down that is right
you shouldn't care about what they say 
and yet i do and you do 
but thats wrong and people have to acknowledge that 
 

The Peace of Wild Things

The Heart

tranquility and calm
peace and serene
soothing, reassuring 
can be found in a heart
the heart of a kind soul
a being beautiful on the inside
who hasn't a care in the world


 

I Wonder

I Wonder
Before you taunted her 
did you ask why she is that way 
did you give her a chance to explain 
before you pushed her 
did you stop and ask yourself 
what if she has somewhere to be
what if she is in pain 
before you laughed at her 
did you know she has mental issues
did you even ask yourself what that could do to her
before you bullied her 
did you know she will get cancer 
did you know her self esteem is part of the reason why 
before you wished her gone
did you know that she will die 
did you know that you will go crawling trying to apologize
did you know that it would be too late
i have been there dear reader and my friend has died of cancer at 15, i just want to say before you do anything think, just think 

Setting as Mood

Notice

The thing about Sandra, is that she is no ordinary girl. She was a girl who had fought through wars inside her head trying to find her identity. She is a hero of her own kind, that had emotions well hidden. She never knew that her noticed and that he was slowly getting to know her from afar. He noticed the way she flinched when she heard the words mom and dad, and the way she always sat alone at lunch. He noticed her persistence to get good grades and the way she always helped those who needed it. Most of all he noticed how she wouldn't accept help from others and would never display her emotions. After all i would know, it takes one to know one except i wish there was that person who noticed. 

Novel Writing Competition 2017

Finding Them

1: Charlie  
  "Charlie,Charlie," my dad calls out to me hysterically. I laugh to myself he probably thinks i ran away again but in reality i was hiding under my bed. He hears my silent giggle and peeks under, his sullen expression turned deadpan when he discovered me. "Charlie why are you hiding, do you know how much of a fright you gave me young lady?" Blah, Blah, and more Blah is all i think to myself while i fish around my head for an excuse. Looking innocent, "father i was just playing around with you, is that a crime?" I challenge him. "No,No you just had me frightened that" he motioned with his hand then quickly changed the subject "So wanna go grab some ice cream?" he says. "Sorry dad, i uhh, have some homework to finish, maybe another time?" He sighs probably mentally counting how many times he heard me say that. I slip out of the room quickly...

feel

What happens when everything she know is taken away 
what is there to do her home is smashed to smithereens
kicked out of her country, big deal 
how do you know if the person you are insulting right now is this girl
would you change how you treat her
how would you feel if you knew that the girl you just insulted is going to get cancer in 3 years 
and guess what she might die too 
treat people the way you would want to be treated becuase you never know what is inside 

The Art of Specificity

His Life After Her

His life was sad.

After his mothers death, Andrew was devastated.
 
The death of Melinda Hughes resulted in the withdrawal of her son Andrew Hughes from society and friends creating a sad atmosphere at home. 

Talking to “You”

The Fall: Chapter One

You run, run as fast as your feet can carry you 
the leaves were breaking under your feet
they are chasing you, gaining up on you 
you couldn't run fast enough 
how could you think with such short breath and aching feet
you find a way suddenly you turn to as right 
you almost hit into a tree but know better
you start climbing the tree fast 
you slip and fall
luckily your head hits some leaves but your foot was not so lucky 
it slammed into a rock 
your head was throbbing and blood appeared at your ankle
you take your ankle in your hands and try to stop the blood with some softer leaves
it doesn't work so you rip off some of your shirt and rap your ankle in it 
you start to feel hunger creeping into your stomach at least they're off your tail fro a while you say to yourself 
now what you think 
your...

Talking to “You”

The Fall: Chapter One

You run, run as fast as your feet can carry you 
the leavesw ere breaking under your feet
they are chasing, gaining up on you 
you counldnt run fast enough 
how could you think with such short breath and aching feet
you find a way sudednly you turn to as right 
you almost hit into a tree but know better
you start climbing the tree fast 
you slip and fall
luckily your head hits some leaves but you foot was not so lucky 
it slammed into a rock 
your head was throbbing and blood appeared at your foot
you take your ankle in your hands and try to stop the blood with some softer leaves
it doesn't work so you rip off some of your shirt and rap your ankle in it 
you start to feel hunger creeping into your stomach at least they're off your tail fro a while you say to yourself 
now what you think 
your ears...

On the Last Day of the World

Diamond Tear

On the last day of the world 
i will go looking for those i love
on the last day of the world i will apologize to those i hurt
on the last day of the world i will kiss away the tear escaping a childs eye 
the child i once knew as myself 
on the last day of the world i will forgive those who hurt me 
on the last day of the world i will thank those who helped me 
on the last day of the world the diamond tear kept inside i will let go