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this_kid_is

United States

Heyo.
My name is Solan.
I'm barely a teenager, but still not a child.
Gender is confusing but I'm kind of a boy.
Stay proud. Stay Strong.
I love you so much.
(lol remember to smile once a day)

Message from Writer

I am not what people call "good at writing" I just have a lot of ideas in my mind, and don't know how to get them out. FYI I mainly write poetry and or passion pieces. Enjoy!

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this_kid_is (United States) published:

Apologies Don't Mean Anything When the Mistake Keeps Happenning

FREE WRITING

Note to self: Making yourself visible does not mean you will be seen. 
You will tell people who you are over and over and over 
Until you wonder if you are speaking the same language
because it seems like they can't understand you
Or maybe
Maybe they just can't see you 
They know you're there but they really don't want to believe you
you're just dropped stitches and careless mistakes 
The foolish fumbling of fingertips 
Following a pattern, they don't...

Seeking Peer Reviews

about 12 hours ago

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Power writer

this_kid_is (United States) earned a badge Power Writer

about 12 hours ago

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this_kid_is (United States) published:

In Between

FREE WRITING

in between
i wish that i could stop living in between
for i have been stuck on the edge of tomboy and trans boy
for such a long time
i forget what it feels like to have both feet on level ground
straddling a boundary that shouldn’t exist is harder than you think it is
living a life that shouldn’t be lived makes you tougher than you want to be
and because clenched fists and bloody knuckles are not great...

Seeking Peer Reviews

14 days ago

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this_kid_is (United States) published:

Who Am I?

FREE WRITING

who am i
which is to say i am a wolf trapped inside this boy’s body
a galaxy chained- no tied to a thirteen-year-old
who may ruin it all someday
but for now he sits here and writes poetry
he is quite simply trying to express just the best parts of him 

Seeking Peer Reviews

14 days ago

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1

this_kid_is (United States) published:

A Love Poem Of A Gay Boy

FREE WRITING

so there’s this boy and the smallest shifts of gravity between us
leaves me stuck in limbo between reality and galaxies
and the stars slowly fall out of alignment
perfection to chaos has never been so beautiful
and i’m left stumbling without a map or sense of direction
heading towards the bewildering territory of being impossibly in love with a boy
and then it all shifts back
and jumping from galaxies back to reality has never been so difficult
i...

Seeking Peer Reviews

14 days ago

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this_kid_is (United States) published:

A Letter To A Young Queer Kid

FREE WRITING

dear kid,
people will try to brand you,
press the hot metal binary into your skin
and the sound of sizzling flesh still stains my eardrums
i will try to hold the fire away
away from your soft body that has not yet hardened to the world
 
dear kid,
let yourself love and let yourself be loved
see yourself as more than just a shattered mirror
you do not need to be fixed
you are beautiful like this
  ...

Seeking Peer Reviews

14 days ago

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this_kid_is (United States) published:

Drowning In My Masculinity

FREE WRITING

drowning in my masculinity
masculinity hasn’t always come easy to me
i have found comfort in deepening my voice and short hair
but masculinity fits me like most of my clothes do
too big
too loose
too baggy
and made for someone who takes up a lot more space than i do
i have spent the majority of my life shying away from social interactions
trying to make myself smaller
clutching my throat so that no one could hear me...

Seeking Peer Reviews

14 days ago

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this_kid_is (United States) published:

A Paradox Of Human Existence

FREE WRITING

a paradox of human existence
i’ve always walked along the line of vulnerable and comfortable
lived the paradox of scared and okay all at the same time
i always think it’s never going to get better and then it does
i’ll say “I’m fine” when i’m actually far from it
in fact i always walked on the edge of the cliff
wanting to stay safe but also wanting to fly for the .2 seconds before i hit the ground
crack...

Seeking Peer Reviews

14 days ago

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this_kid_is (United States) published:

Dear Mr. President

PROMPT: Your Voice: Globalization

                                    Dear Mr. President,
                           When I was younger I used to blindly follow, believing that we were a community; maybe not a global community, but at least a national community. Now, I know that the blind fate I had in those in control was pure ignorance. I do not know when I realized that our country, our world, has always been divided, but...

Seeking Peer Reviews

21 days ago

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Best seller

this_kid_is (United States) earned a badge Best Seller

22 days ago

Published Work

Apologies Don't Mean Anything When the Mistake Keeps Happenning

Note to self: Making yourself visible does not mean you will be seen. 
You will tell people who you are over and over and over 
Until you wonder if you are speaking the same language
because it seems like they can't understand you
Or maybe
Maybe they just can't see you 
They know you're there but they really don't want to believe you
you're just dropped stitches and careless mistakes 
The foolish fumbling of fingertips 
Following a pattern, they don't even know they started.

I am so tired of hearing these apologies
Yes, I know you have known me for a long time
Yes, I know that you are fucking trying 
Yes, I know my gender is hard for you to remember. 
Believe me, I fucking know
But I have spent my whole life forgetting myself 
Fitting myself into boxes 
Bending over backwards for someone else's standards 
Shrinking myself a size too small
And pretending it felt right
This is...

In Between

in between
i wish that i could stop living in between
for i have been stuck on the edge of tomboy and trans boy
for such a long time
i forget what it feels like to have both feet on level ground
straddling a boundary that shouldn’t exist is harder than you think it is
living a life that shouldn’t be lived makes you tougher than you want to be
and because clenched fists and bloody knuckles are not great accessories
i have learned to keep my mouth shut and my head down
to not make a single sound
for i’ve been taught that saying what they want you to say is easier than saying what needs to be heard
and i wish that cis passing and hyper-masculinizing were not synonyms
but they are… sadly
i wish that trans nonbinary did not translate to imaginary, to fake, to special snowflake
i wish that i wasn’t so in between 

Who Am I?

who am i
which is to say i am a wolf trapped inside this boy’s body
a galaxy chained- no tied to a thirteen-year-old
who may ruin it all someday
but for now he sits here and writes poetry
he is quite simply trying to express just the best parts of him 

A Love Poem Of A Gay Boy

so there’s this boy and the smallest shifts of gravity between us
leaves me stuck in limbo between reality and galaxies
and the stars slowly fall out of alignment
perfection to chaos has never been so beautiful
and i’m left stumbling without a map or sense of direction
heading towards the bewildering territory of being impossibly in love with a boy
and then it all shifts back
and jumping from galaxies back to reality has never been so difficult
i have become a world-renowned scholar in the art of seemingly innocent ploys to make his skin touch mine just one more time
and perfecting my phrasing so that an accidental betrayal of my heart is avoided
this thing is beginning to feel like the most complicated of dances and i’m beginning to get tired of remembering it
of hiding it. 

A Letter To A Young Queer Kid

dear kid,
people will try to brand you,
press the hot metal binary into your skin
and the sound of sizzling flesh still stains my eardrums
i will try to hold the fire away
away from your soft body that has not yet hardened to the world
 
dear kid,
let yourself love and let yourself be loved
see yourself as more than just a shattered mirror
you do not need to be fixed
you are beautiful like this
 
dear young queer kid,
i will always see you as human
even when you do not see yourself as one
because you are worthy of respect and love
and if anyone tells you otherwise,
that you are less that that
i will tell you every day that you are valid just the way you are
i will say that if family was no more than blood
this community if sliced open would match drop for drop
because without each other...

Drowning In My Masculinity

drowning in my masculinity
masculinity hasn’t always come easy to me
i have found comfort in deepening my voice and short hair
but masculinity fits me like most of my clothes do
too big
too loose
too baggy
and made for someone who takes up a lot more space than i do
i have spent the majority of my life shying away from social interactions
trying to make myself smaller
clutching my throat so that no one could hear me even if they wanted
and now i’m fighting back eating disorders
for my need to be smaller grows an inch every time I get misgendered
 
sometimes my masculinity scares me
because being transgender and man is a mocking paradox
my existence is self-destruction
and my self-destruction is me existence
i am accidental oppressor and oppressed
i am drowning in my masculinity and i hear sea levels are rising

A Paradox Of Human Existence

a paradox of human existence
i’ve always walked along the line of vulnerable and comfortable
lived the paradox of scared and okay all at the same time
i always think it’s never going to get better and then it does
i’ll say “I’m fine” when i’m actually far from it
in fact i always walked on the edge of the cliff
wanting to stay safe but also wanting to fly for the .2 seconds before i hit the ground
crack of cartilage and bone on solid ground at the bottom
i guess the idea of falling always scared me but the idea of flight was an excite and it felt safer to be lower
a combination of the fear of falling and the joy of fight
i am the paradox of human existence
the want or need, the boy or girl, the oppressed or oppressor, the fear or feared
i was supposed to be one or the other but i...

Your Voice: Globalization

Dear Mr. President

                                    Dear Mr. President,
                           When I was younger I used to blindly follow, believing that we were a community; maybe not a global community, but at least a national community. Now, I know that the blind fate I had in those in control was pure ignorance. I do not know when I realized that our country, our world, has always been divided, but I did. And now, I notice the smallest things that divide us in any community, my family, my neighborhood, my school, my city, my state, and my country. Mr. Trump, now, why would I be telling you this? Well the answer to that is simple.
                           Mr. President you campaigned on the promise of dividing us even more than we already are, and since you have been in office you have kept to that promise. Mr. Trump, I am telling you...

When I Was A Little Boy

when i was a little boy i would play kingdom with all of my little kid friends
when I was a little boy I would play the prince
protector of all the princesses, locking wizards and warlocks in dungeons
slaying dragons and evil nights just because I fucking could even though it was just in my head
because I was wearing a cinderella dress but in my mind it was armor
because I was wearing a tiara but in my mind it was a prince’s crown
because I would always hold this tinkerbell wand but it was my sword
 
when i was a little boy i fit their definition of female perfectly
but i always wanted to redefine myself as something else more in between maybe boy
little boy cries disguised as little girl laughs
little boy hair twelve inches too long
but i always had a good imagination
i used to be able to stand in front of...

Talking to “You”

Begin to love yourself

You need to start telling yourself that you derserve to be heard. 
That you are worth every friend that you have 
everyone's love that you've earned. 
Tell yourself that your past is no longer your present. 
Tell yourself that you deserve all the happiness you have. 
You are worth it. 
You need to learn to love yourself. 

 

Returning

Elementary School

this place used to be so much bigger
why is the ceiling so low
i thought the walls were white
i miss this place
but i liked it better when i was ten
but what i miss the most are the people 
i miss my old friends 
and even my old foes 
it seems too small now 
i guess i grew out of the place and the people 
 

Beyond

i wish that there was a way to exist beyond my body 
because flesh and bone seem just to material for people like me

i wish that broken hearts would reveal galaxies of undiscovered self
and not just pain, and not just a reminder of our mortality 

i wish that it didn't hurt as much as it does to be stuck in this body
because pain seems just to physical for a mind to feel

i wish that the hopeless romantic would never lose hope in love
because love is something that can exist beyond the body-- 
it is something not quite held and more like felt.

Into the Woods

It's A Jungle Out There

we can run down that street with stars in our eyes
facing adolescence with moonlight in our souls.  

jungles are out there and we are ready for them
converting caffeine to poetry with science we never understood. 

our jungles may be sentences of similes and metaphors
but nevertheless they are existent and dangerous.
 
forests full of peculiar organisms called people
and we, the awkward writers attempt to understand them 

we camouflage with children or adults 
the awkward in between, a mock of a paradox. 

'it's a jungle out there' they say in reference to the death of creativity
trees of letters in replace of wood no green only paper. 

beware of teenage angst and failed classes 
attempts at poetry and crumpled paper. 

we the awkward adolescent step proudly across the line
of young, new field and wild, old jungle. 

with our field guide to peculiar creatures called people
written in little kid scribbles and poetry. 

we are ready for the jungle out there. 

Other Worlds

Happily Ever After

"And they lived happily ever after..." I always hated that ending, I guess that even my five-year-old self knew that wasn't reality. I always hated the "and the prince saves the princess, and they fall in love" bullshit, I guess even my five-year-old self knew that heteronormativity would rule my life from then on. But now, I crave the happily ever after I was always told about. I crave a prince to save me, but that would be weird... Wouldn't it? a prince, saving another Prince is not in any story book. But then how come I still crave to be saved?  But my prince comes in the shape of a princess, who actually isn't a princess, but a scared thirteen-year-old girl with long red hair, and freckles, and an adorable dimple on her left cheek. My prince, well she's a warrior- and a worrier too- she's scared of almost as much as I am. My prince, well she's, short and...

Closets

Closets
I don't like closets, 
I never have, 
Frankly, I am claustrophobic.
 So being locked in a closet 
With the only company
Being the skeletons hung in there
Scared me more than spiders 
To an arachnophobe. 
But you made the living room
An unshared space and 
Now I'm feeling like a guest in my own house. 

 

Becoming Human

Stars

I am a star
taking up one piece of that construction paper
just another piece of glitter plastered on two pieces of black paper
that's what I am
to you
just a speck of gold, the pin prick on your universe
but to me I am giant ball of fiery, flaming gas  
I sleep when the sun is out and
I awake when the moon is out
one step away from becoming the next supernova
I take up more of the universe and you will ever know dear human,
I know of aliens and other planets 
I can see further into the galaxies of life than you can see into tomorrow
I can sleep and wake
and breathe everything that a star must breathe
I am Stardust just a speck of glitter
on a piece of construction paper to you.

Unbelievable Food

A Transgender Dish

A dash of self hatred 
A pinch of dysphoria 
a handful of anxiety and depression
bake at a size 32B chest
add a teaspoon of femininity
and a quarter cup of masculinity
shred binders and packers into the mix. 
Preheat the oven to "it would have been easier if you didn't come out" 
Pour the mixture into a 8 by 8 pan 
And place in the oven for "1 1/2 more years till i can start testosterone" amount of minutes. 
When done it should look like an awkward boy who still uses the women's bathroom. 


 

Welcome To Society

Welcome to Society, 
We hope your trip here was nice, 
Please feel free to be yourself, 
As long as it's the way we say you should be, 
Make sure you love your body, 
But not too much or we'll call you vain, 
We'll tear you down for smiling, 
and then wonder why you always frown, 
You can fall in love with anyone, 
as long as they are of the opposite sex as you, 
and that it's who we want you to be in love with
We'll tell you that you worthless, 
And you shouldn't make a sound, 
And then we'll cry with all the others
as we bury you in the ground, 
We'll let you have your own opinion, 
but please shape them to our views. 
Welcome to society, 
We hope you enjoy your stay. 



 

Geography of Home

Bedroom Writing

Bedroom, 
It doesn't have a lock, 
but there's a sign that says, 
"Please knock" 
Walls covered in band posters
and song quotes, 
a twin bed crammed in the corner, 
A desk covered in writing 
My typewriter get's the prized place, 
front in center, 
pens, pencils, markers, and highlighters 
in a mason jar behind my laptop, 
Papers strewn across the desk top, 
Homework carelessly thrown to the ground, 
piles of completed notebooks, 
journals, 
and diaries up to my knees, 
take up precious space of my floor.
My friends joke that my room 
is full of "writer stuff" 
My parents joke that 
"papers fly out of my room any time that i open my door, 
which is rare" 
I have a closet chalked full of flannels, 
ironic, i know
I have a wardrobe with all my clothes shoved in it, 
the drawers can barely shut

I never open the windows, 
and never turn on lights, 
so my room is always cloaked 
in...

Poetry and Spoken Word Competition

A Letter To The Girl I Never Was

Dear Dead Name,
Your long black hair is still woven
Between the spines of my old hairbrush,
Which I can't seem to throw away
Even though I will never need it again.
It still has something of you left.
What can I say,
I'm sentimental.
Even though I thought you were gone,
The world still sees you before it sees me.
Sometimes I still can catch glimpses of you in car windows,
Or I get told that I would looked better as you
By family whose eyes scream their mindset of mourning.
They still gift you dresses for Christmas,
They give them to me.
They want you back so badly. 
But hell, 
Those people,  
They never knew you.  
They never knew you didn't like dresses in the first place. 

Dear Dead Name,
I'm sorry I had to force you away for me to exist.
I never imagined the possibility of your death,
Out there.
You died slowly.
Quietly.
A lot...

Poetry and Spoken Word Competition

A Letter To The Girl I Never Was

Dear Dead Name,
Your long black hair is still woven
Between the spines of my old hairbrush,
Which I can't seem to throw away
Even though I will never need it again.
But it still has something of you left.
What can I say,
I'm sentimental.
Even though I thought you were gone,
the world still sees you before it sees me.
Sometimes I still can catch glimpses of you in car windows,
Or I get told that I would looked better as you
By family whose eyes scream their mindset of mourning.
They want you back so badly.
They still gift you dresses for Christmas,
Though they give them to me.

Dear Dead Name,
I'm sorry I had to force you away for me to exist.
I never imagined the possibility of your death,
Out there.
You died slowly.
Quietly.
A lot of people still don't know.
I'm sorry every day my mind is still stuck on
The idea...

Alone(ish)

I know I have friends,
I wouldn't say I'm popular, 
But I know there are people, 
For me to depend on. 

And yet, 
I find myself in this same situation, 
Same thoughts night after night,  
The same self loathing. 

I know I have people I can talk to, 
I know I am not alone, 
Yet everything that I need to say, 
Just gets caught in my throat. 

I know I have friends, 
But it seems like I have no one, 
To talk to, 
About all the shit that goes on in my mind. 

 

Poetry and Spoken Word Competition

A Letter To The Girl I Never Was

Dear Dead Name, 
Your long black hair is still woven 
Between the spines of my old hairbrush,
Which I can't seem to throw away 
Even though I will never need it again.
But it still has something of you left.
What can I say,
I'm sentimental. 
Even though I thought you were gone, 
Apparently the world still sees you before it sees me. 
Sometimes I still can catch glimpses of you in car windows, 
Or I get told that I would looked better as you 
By family whose eyes scream their mindset of mourning.
They want you back so badly. 
They still gift you dresses for christmas, 
Though they give them to me. 
They want you back so badly, 
But hell,
Those people, 
They never knew you. 
They never knew you didn't like dresses in the first place.

Dear Dead Name,
I'm sorry I had to force you away for me to exist.
I never imagined the possibility of your...

Synchronized Sounds

Transgender Slam

transgender
trying to change 
the way you view me
terrifyingly attempting to 
be myself
and in the end what do I say 
when you ask me to tell you 
my personal tale 
with all the details 
I do not want to share
you tear my heart in two  
because my identity 
didn't match your definition. 

I Remember

I Forget... I Am Sorry

I remember nothing, 
and yet 
I remember everything. 
I remember wishing you were mine. 
I remember holding you hand
I remember that first time
I remember nothing. 
Because
How could I have known 
I should of cherished every 
single second. 
How could I have known
That I should have 
remembered your eyes... 
and every star that shone beneath them
Remembered you heart, 
and the stead rhythm it had
How could I have known 
That the beat of your heart would be 
beeping on the monitor. 
But 
I remember the big moments
our first kiss
our last one
our fist conversation. 
and our last one.  
I remember blushing every time our 
friends said your name.

Flying Into Love

falling in love,
it is falling,
and I fell hopelessly in love with you...

I don't even remember falling,
I just remember holding your hand
and realizing how much it would hurt to let go...

I remember holding your hand
and flying to the sky,
because when we touched,
I wasn't falling... not anymore...

The term falling in love
implies something painful,
and maybe falling out of love is,
but it really should be flying into love.
 

Thoughts

I know I have friends,
But sometimes I feel like
There's no one to talk to
About what goes on inside my head

What do you wanna be when your grow up?

Adult: What do you wanna be when you grow up?
Me: A writer
Adult: Pick something realistic.
Me: A writer.
Adult: Don't be stupid. You know you'll earn nothing. What do you actually want to be?
Me: A doctor?
Adult: That's an unobtainable goal. Pick again, you can be anything.
Me: A writer.
Adult: *scoffs* okay
Me: *thinks* You ask me what I want to be, I tell you. You tell that my dream is stupid, so I change it, then you tell me that that dream is unobtainable. I'm confused, you told me writing won't earn me a livelihood, so I tell you I want to be a doctor, you tell me that's too hard. Then you tell me that I can be anything, so I revert back to my original plan, I want to be a writer. If you want to tell me what to be, don't bother asking.
Me: *says* okay.
 

WILD

Wild

Wild...
by dictionary definition it means 
adjective:

  1. (of an animal or plant) living or growing in the natural environment; not domesticated or cultivated.
  2. uncontrolled or unrestrained, especially in pursuit of pleasure.  
noun:
  1. a natural state or uncultivated or uninhabited region.
  2. a remote uninhabited or sparsely inhabited area.
But
to me
at least
the best way to describe wild...
is,
thoughts...
language...
writing...
art...
wild.
A peregrine falcon is the fastest bird,
so fast that it's almost as speedy as thoughts,
so fast that it's faster than a kids expression of creativity.
Wild...
It's something inside of us,
like another emotion,
we are wild.
 

Vodoo Doll


Enemy made, curse their courage, pierce a needle through their heart.
Control the body, mind and soul.
Warp their conscience; pull it apart.
Manipulation through a dark art.
A wretched spirit will take your words,
And morph them into sorrowful mourns.
Blood, it drips from a concealed blade.
In the hands of a bony slave.
A gleaming teardrop makes its way,
down my cheek,
slightly relieving the pain.
It hurts, it stings,
It's in my head,
It pierces my skin
It bruises, it scars, wounds painful.


 

This I Believe

Hi My Name Is...

Hi my name is... Solan
Hi my name is... dyke
Hi my name is... tranny
Hi my name is... gay
Hi my name is... queer
Hi my name is...
None of your business, please stop labeling me for things I cannot control.

    I believe in diversity. I believe in the uniqueness of the individual. I believe in my strengths, my weaknesses, my flaws, and my abilities. I believe in you, and your individual impact on this world. I believe in the good, the bad, the ugly, and the gorgeous. Because I believe every single person is incredibly and brilliantly beautiful. This I believe.
    We are all unique, and all of us deserve to be treated as individuals that we are. We shouldn't be shoved and crammed into categories, or labeled by our outward appearance. We are more than a label. We are more than the name tag that's glued to our skin. We are more than shell that encases our...

Becoming Human

Stars

 I am a star
taking up one piece of that construction paper
just another piece of glitter plastered on two pieces of black paper
that's what I am
to you
just a speck of gold, the pin point of your universe
but to me I giant ball of firey, flaming gas  
I sleep when the moon is out and
I awake when the sun is out
one step away from becoming the next supernova
I take up more of the universe and you will never know dear human,
I know of aliens and other planets 
I can see for the galaxies of life then you can see into tomorrow
I can sleep and wake
and breathe everything that a star must breathe
I am Stardust just a speck of glitter
on a piece of construction paper to you

Valentine's Day

I'm just a kid, 
but... 
I know what love is...
I know it's that feeling in your stomach, 
like you on the top of a really tall building,
looking down on everyone and everything. 

I'm just a kid, 
but... 
I've been real close to suicide about four or five times, 
and I know, 
that when you're around, 
I can see a future, 
I know that I live for you... 

I may just be a kid, 
but... 
I'm not stupid, so I'll says this while I can, 
I love you.

What Came Before

A History Lesson

4.54 billion years ago the earth was formed.
in an explosion of rock and dirt, of gas and fire,
our planet came into being.
according to science nearly 200,000 years ago
humans were first thought of.
3500 years ago the first verse of the bible was written.
in 1492 Columbus sailed the ocean blue,
and "discovered" America, in a tirade of violence and oppression.
in 1775 America was liberated from England,
but more importantly a war was ended.
in 1789 Gorge Washington took office.
in 1861 another war was started, and yet again
we were fighting for the liberation of people from people.
in 1865 the Civil War ended, with the Union victorious.
in 1914 WWI was started.
in 1918 WWI was ended.
in 1920 women in America got the right to vote.
from September 1, 1939 to September 2, 1945 WWII was fought.
in 1965 black men in America got the right to vote.
in 1981 the aids epidemic...

Philosphy

And I'll reply, I'm just blessed to still be breathing,
'Cuz last night I was bleeding
                    'Cuz last night I was sleeping.

And now I'm assembling my philosophies
From the fragments of my broken memories

 

Signing Off

Signing Off

Dear Anxiety,
Have a good holiday, wherever you are going.
My Christmas Present to you was a higher dosage of Prozac.
Yours to me was another anxiety attack.
I guess we are both trying to kill each other.
I hope you have a good holiday in the back of my mind,
Although I do know you will be back,
Once school starts again,
And once break is over,
And once 2017 starts.
I do know you will be back...
Along with the crippling depression you came with,
A two for one deal, I didn't bargain for.
I know you will be back...
With everything else you came with.
And I know I've never been too grateful,
But, I guess, thanks.
Thank you for teaching me how to live with fear,
Thank you for teaching me to kill my emotions.
Wishing you the worst,
Solan

Why I Write

Why Write?

I write because... I don't know what I would do if i didn't

I write because it is a necessity, like air and water, and sunlight. 
I write because I have to.
Because If I didn't I would simply die.
I write because if I didn't it would feel as if a lung had been ripped from me.
I write because I need to... not because I want to, but because if I didn't it would be suicide.
 

Open Prompt

(Untitled)

At age three
I was brainwashed to believe 
that we had to live up to the predetermined 
plot line. That i could only ever be 
society's version of normal.
and for a three year old girl that's
playing with dolls, dressing up in pink and purple 
princess dresses. That was brushing hair
and playing fairies at recess. 

From the age of five 
it seemed that society 
had already 
decided our destiny.
That we already had a story 
written for us.
The only catch
we couldn't contradict 
the reality of our false identity.

At age seven I realized I was different 
from what they wanted me to be,
but though it wasn't bullying, i'm pretty sure that if 
I cut my hair short, or wore pants and played tag 
with the boys then I would most 
defiantly be made fun of. 

Age nine I realized 
that each school had an archive of names 
ready to be used against you. I realized...

Self and a Statistic

Young Girls

A young girl stares at her phone screen mesmerized by the sight that shines bright before her. And she thinks of all that she could become.

A young girl stares at her phone screen terrified by the sight that shines bright before her. And she thinks of all that she is not, and all that she must become.

While social media helps kids realize their full potential it also promotes the unrealistic ideals.

Beauty

Darling, beautiful things have dents, scratches, and bruises... imperfections and scars...

Darling, not all beautiful things are flawless, and not all flawless things are beautiful.

You may not be flawless, darling, but you are beautiful nonetheless.

Self and a Statistic

Young Girls

A young girl stares at her phone screen mesmerized by the sight that shines bright before. And she thinks of all that she could become.

A young girl stares at her phone screen terrified by the sight that shines bright before. And she thinks of all that she is not, and all that she must become.

While social media helps kids realize their full potential it also promotes the unrealistic ideals.

...

We all will eat lies if our hearts get hungry enough.

 

Names, Names, Names

Proper Pronouns

A breakfast joint- Walking On Eggshells
A new smartphone- Stars s5
An eyeglasses store- Eye Spy
A dog pound- Ruff Lives
A highway- Life Is A highway and I'm gonna ride it all night long...
An island resort- Land Of Welcome
A new constellation- Light
A pet polar bear- Vanilla Ice
A nail polish color- Flash Lipstick Red
A new butterfly species- Fire Tales



My name- Solan...
It's not that hard to remember...
My name on school registries- Soojin
My name at Starbucks- Sola
It's Solan.... Jesus Christ just respect my name...

Names, Names, Names

Proper Pronouns

A breakfast joint- Walking On Eggshells
A new smartphone- Stars s5
An eyeglasses store- Eye Spy
A dog pound- Ruff Lives
A highway- Life Is A highway and I'm gonna ride it all night long...
An island resort- Land Of Welcome
A new constellation- Light
A pet polar bear- Vanilla Ice
A nail polish color- Flash Lipstick Red
A new butterfly species- Fire Tales



The names Solan... It's not that hard to remember...
But on school registries it's still Soojin
And at Starbucks it's Sola
It's Solan.... Jesus Christ just respect my name...

My December Competition

December

The days are getting  shorter so sometimes I walk home in the dark,
Carrying my binders and textbooks I charge past buildings with Christmas lights that line the windows,
I work extra hard to maintain my A's in term two.
The extra space in my locker is now filled with heavy winter coats,
And extra sweatshirts,

White snow dusts the ground covering the cement
The ground becomes tattooed boot prints,
The trail of imprints gives proof to life,
My closet is slowly shifting from T-shirts two hoodies
And I replaced my converse with winter boots getting ready for the storm to come
 
I keep some extra change in my pockets
because on every street corner there's a guy dressed as Santa
ringing a bell to raise money for the Salvation Army 

The days are getting shorter, so sometimes I want to come in the dark
 
Yesterday I walked home in the snow
My shadow was following me, it was...

My December Competition

December

  The days are getting  shorter so sometimes I walk home in the dark
carrying my binders and textbooks I charge past buildings with Christmas lights that line the windows I work extra hard to maintain my A in algebra
 Any extra space that I may have in my locker has been filled with my heavy winter coat 
 White snow dusts the ground covering the cement
the ground becomes tattooed bootprints, it gives proof to life
 my closet is slowly shifting from T-shirts two hoodies
and I replaced my converse with winter boots getting ready for the storm to come 
 I keep some extra change in my pockets
because on every street corner there's a guy dressed as Santa
ringing a bell to raise money for the Salvation Army 
 The days are getting shorter so sometimes I want to come in the dark 
 Yesterday I walked home in the snow
my shadow was following me, it was funny
because I could...

Open Prompt

(Untitled)

At age three
I was brainwashed to believe 
that we had to live up to the predetermined 
plot line. That i could only ever be 
society's version of normal.
and for a three year old girl that's
playing with dolls, dressing up in pink and purple 
princess dresses. That was brushing hair
and playing fairies at recess. 

From the age of five 
it seemed that society 
had already 
decided our destiny.
That we already had a story 
written for us.
The only catch
we couldn't contradict 
the reality of our false identity.

At age seven I realized I was different 
from what they wanted me to be,
but though it wasn't bullying, i'm pretty sure that if 
I cut my hair short, or wore pants and played tag 
with the boys then I would most 
defiantly be made fun of. 

Age nine I realized 
that each school had an archive of names 
ready to be used against you. I realized...

10 Second Essays

Ten Second Essay (Working title)

1) Hearts aren't supposed to be handed out like stickers in a pre-school.

2) Crying is a human necessity; but then how come we are judged when we do cry?

3) The worst pain I have ever felt wasn't a physical wound, but a broken heart.

4) I know it's hard to believe, but sometimes kids know more about what pain is then an adult.

5) Pain isn't just one emotion; no its a million different feelings that a soul can feel at one time.

6) The one most accessible way of communication is writing, which is why it is important that everyone is literate. 

7) People can only ever be people.

8) Words are the only weapon more powerful than a gun. 

9) Pain is relevant even in joy, similarly joy is relevant even in pain.

10) Ever riddle life throws at you has two answers; one is so obvious it seems to be the most conspicuous thing in...

10 Second Essays

Ten Second Essay (Working title)

1) Hearts aren't supposed to be handed out like stickers in a pre-school.

2) Crying is a human necessity; but then how come we are judged when we do cry?

3) The worst pain I have ever felt wasn't a physical wound, but a broken heart.

4) I know it's hard to believe, but sometimes kids know more about what pain is then an adult.

5) Pain isn't just one emotion; no its a million different feelings that a soul can feel at one time.

6) The one most accessible way of communication is writing, which is why it is important that everyone is literate. 

7) People can only ever be people.

8) Words are the only weapon more powerful than a gun. 




 

this_kid_is's 16 Likes

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