Peer Review by Quille (United States of America)()

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school

By: hanni03.01


FREE WRITING

The clock is ticking on the wall
That´s where the attention goes
The class is boring for us all
I´m drawing on my sheet a rose

There is some whisper all around
Just five minutes then we can leave
The teacher tells us to shut up
Students are putting on their coats

Another worksheet now we get
"It must be done by the next day"
This homework makes the class upset
The teacher smiles and goes away

Homeworks sometimes are okay
But please not every single day
There´s lots of pressure on a child
On many students on that world 

Please, dear teacher can you say
how you think I should spend my day?
Do you remember how it was,
being a student in a class?

At home I eat if I have time
I want to watch Netflix or Amazon prime
But I take my schoolbag instead
Do homeworks and study and feel kind of dead

It´s midnight now and I am half done
Now I really need a plan
My English teacher won´t be too mad
So I´ll only do Spanish and then go to bed.

In German tomorrow I can do maths
While pretending I pay attention in class
That is the only way how it works
But yet I still wonder why I´m loosing weight


Message to Readers

Maybe I should stop writing poems when I´m supposed to do my homeworks...
Anyways... tell me how you feel about school and homeworks.
Can you relate to this poem?
Also feel free to tell me some things about the school system where you live as it is different in every country :D


Peer Review

I'm homeschooled, but I can still relate to this a lot. I like the way you used such clever phrasing to show the emotions of the day. It created a vivid, relatable picture for me :) Your rhymes are also very strong and well put to use :DD


Nothing really; I guess if you wanted you could add something like the color of the wall that the clock is on. But that's not necessary; I feel like your poem is really complete the way it is.


Reviewer Comments

I really enjoy reading your poetry and hope that you keep writing it :D
Your word choices, rhymes/rhythm, and descriptions are all excellent and work well together to create a very strong, harmonious piece that captures emotion well and is very vivid for me :))
God Bless you and keep writing! :DD