Anha

Australia

dreaming of goddesses, sunflowers and italian sunshine.

write free, SomeFormOfWriting
miss you, LackingASocialLife
go be great, paperbird

Message to Readers

god this is so unpolished, but i want to make it better. tear me apart with criticism.

likes and comments much appreciated

you terrify me with your intensity, so i decided to write poetry about you

January 12, 2019

FREE WRITING

18
an arabian prince arrives on the streets
the next night his cousin performs onstage
torso class in velvet, arms snug in black lace
roses fall from her hair as she stomps and twirls
one after another, every sudden movement an added displacement
he picks the fallen flowers and places them aside, next to a candle in a wicker-woven nest
but it's all part of the show
for he looks much more handsome without the artificial desert lights and strangers watching his feet for rhythm and misstep
the kohl only accentuates his acne scars
sweat flies, a golden ichor, the fruit of labour and poise
in the end he blows out the candle and puts the wilted rose in his hair
he smiles - it doesn't reach his eyes - and bows
this is based on real events, i hope to god they don't sue

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15 Comments
  • acrosstheskysky

    this is so beautiful wow and i loove the title!


    10 months ago
  • Blotted Ink with a Broken Quill

    WOW


    10 months ago
  • Blotted Ink with a Broken Quill

    WOW


    10 months ago
  • loveletterstosappho

    the title has me weak and so does the entire thing tbh. i especially love the line "roses fall from her hair as she stomps and twirls" and the last line. beautiful


    10 months ago
  • paperbird

    i love this... so beautiful and strangely touching. particularly "sweat flies, a golden ichor, the fruit of labour and poise". there is so much truth in your wording. the last sentence had me shook.


    10 months ago
  • majestically awkward manatee

    Winners of my mini contest have been announced!
    https://writetheworld.com/groups/1/shared/99016/version/188273

    Also, love this :)


    10 months ago
  • Anha

    @nezi_nes thanks for the analysis XD and you can think that if you want, but i wasn't really focusing on themes or motifs or anything lmao. i just watched him be extra as hell and was scared but poetry was happening in action so i just wrote it down. if y'all wanna ask how much of this is true, i'll tell you.


    10 months ago
  • nezi_nes

    This sounds like something we would get in an English exam. At first nothing makes sense and then it hits you. Then you gradually see hints of meanings and themes pop up, and now it's so drilled into me that I see patterns in your writing, like what if the theme of this poem was about the oppression of the freedom of man by society itself, through the rigid structure and expectations of jobs, and through expectations of behaviour according to society's code of conduct, all at the expense of their true, personal freedom? Motifs of the candle and the rose, the acne behind the kohl, the smile...uhuhuhsdkfhalsdh this is good and creepy and a masterpiece (otherwise why would it be on an official imagined examination paper huh :)


    10 months ago
  • Johanna

    Unfortunately (again), I don't have anything... try asking rmw to contact me, maybe?


    10 months ago
  • Johanna

    I don't have Discord unfortunately...


    10 months ago
  • rosemarywisdom

    @ Anha, love to meet up sometime! U still here next weekend? There's this great bookshop in Great World City...


    10 months ago
  • Johanna

    Ahh the title reminds me of my piece Forbidden... Also, definitely! How long are you going to be in SG, though? Not sure I'm available today...


    10 months ago
  • AJ - Izzy

    Hey, contest results are up!
    https://writetheworld.com/groups/1/shared/98265/version/186834


    10 months ago
  • R.j.Elsewhere

    L O V E I T. Also, the name has me dead


    10 months ago
  • Araw

    Wonderful read! Love your style and imagery.


    10 months ago