Peer Review by Lopiekins (United States)

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Trapped

By: someoneyetnooneatall


FREE WRITING

I'm expected to fit a box
That I cannot mold into 
From the expected I'm lost 
To what extent does it cost
To fall into something that I cannot get to
I'm expected to fit a box
From this box my heart's begun to frost
And I don't know if it'll thaw how it'd like to
From the expected I am lost
All of the judges coming in flocks 
But because of this bot I cannot become
the person that I was meant to
I'm expected to fit a box
It's impossible to change the box I'd have 
to turn back the clocks
However even if we could it wouldn't change the view
From the expected I am lost
No matter the cost we couldn't change
the mocks from not fitting in the box
But whoever said that we had to?
I'm expected to fit a box
From the expected I'm lost

This is old but it's my original so...yea...

Message to Readers

This is old but I would like some critical feedback for improvement. Plz and thx.


Peer Review

I was moved by how well the author understands the enormous issue today of fitting in, and what it can do to a person


Don't deepen it. This story probes the readers mind, bringing up their own situations and emotions regarding the topic, and I think that is exactly how it should be.


Reviewer Comments

I just want to say that I can relate to this very personally, because I am one of my biggest judges, and it's caused me some real issues, especially in combination with my anxiety. This was a wonderful piece, and I feel like I can connect with it