Vannah

United States

Y'know, I really hope I can pull off the cool mysterious deep writer persona. That'd be sick.

Message from Writer

When I write, I can shake off all my cares. - Anne Frank

I Didn't Realize-

April 24, 2019

FREE WRITING

2
I didn't realize what I did until I did it. 
I drew my own blood.
My snotty nose ran.
I don't feel pretty, or beautiful.
I'm disgusting. 
You call a girl sitting on the edge of her bed crying and doing- God it's to horrid to say.
You call that. That. Beautiful?
God please.
It's not.
It's sad.
It's disgusting. 
Perhaps not repulsive, but it makes you feel a way in the pit of your gut. 
A special, unforgivable way that only happens when you see it. When you do it. 


I didn't realize what I did until I did it.
I just crossed a line I could ever return.
I wanted to try anything once,
be daring and exciting,
loosen up,
chill out,
I felt so called out by every one and their mother for being so "stiff" and "plain" and "boring"
I was scared of missing out on something in my youth.
But I missed out on nothing, because how I felt after wasn't worth it.


I didn't realize what I had done until I did it.
I was a big secret.
No lies involved, just scared.
Scared of rejection,
Scared of disappointment. 
I wanted to improve, but how could I if I had no one to rely on?
What if I trusted the wrong person and they rejected me? Betrayed me?

I didn't realize what I had done until I did it.
I broke. 

Print

See History
1

Login or Signup to provide a comment.

4 Comments
  • Vannah

    I like to try to write scary piece, that move your mind to another line of thinking. I'm sorry if they make you dislike the poem, but each part plays into its own job.


    over 1 year ago
  • Julius Caesar

    This ~is~ a really nice piece but there's some parts that concern me. "I drew my own blood" and "I just crossed a line I could ever return" those scare me. Maybe it's because of my line of thinking, idk. Otherwise, really good piece.


    over 1 year ago
  • Vannah

    Thank you so much!


    over 1 year ago
  • bride124

    I read this over and over again! It is SUPER good. I have so much to say, but I'll put that in my peer review. Anyway, good job!


    over 1 year ago