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svictoria

Hungary

I happened to notice that I like the activity of writing, so every now and then, I find myself here.

Thoughts while playing color switch

February 1, 2016

FREE WRITING

2
I remember being a kid, naive as children are, thinking my parents will remain together. There's no way it would happen to me too, it only happens to others. And now, here we are, me not talking to my father for years now, thinking how unreal it seemed back then.
I don't believe in eternal love. There's no such thing as loving someone for a lifetime and marriage based on actual love is imbalanced and hopeless. Because love itself is so fragile, it comes and goes, and lust is getting harder and harder to achieve throughout the time, while temptation comes with it's sweetness and you need to but eventually can't resist. I don't want that. I don't want to age with someone witnessing as our once burning love and desire grows colder with each day, both of us pretending that there's still something left to save. If I ever meet love, I want us to die young at the top of our lives, just before things would become worse, so we'll close our eyes thinking how full it was, still aching to touch one another one last time. I'm way too selfish to live with someone I don't long to wake up next to anymore, even if it would be for a good cause, such as keeping a family together. 
We should've created the society that is based on who we are and not on who we want to be, causing unsatisfied and unhappy people losing their way wanting to be someone else. We should've met people with all skin tones and nationalities on the first place so all of us would know that someone just borns with that skin tone and someone with another, simple as that. And we should've create circumstances where gay people couldn't have had a second thought about undertaking who they love, and we would know that some of us likes boys and some of us likes girls regardless of genders. We should've not create a life that includes marriage as a fulfillment of love and let it become a standard. We should've accept that in most cases love is just something that flows through us, freely, each time with a different speed instead of claiming that the moral thing to do is to be obsessed about taming
something way too restless to ever obey. And all those rare ones who experience love that lasts should be as equally accepted as the ones who don't and it should be a way of living and not a requirement nor a goal. We should've raised our kids that way so they wouldn't feel like they live in a torn apart family after divorces.
But now thinking about it makes me question my own self. 
What would we do if we wouldn't have so many imperfections to fight against? 
What would you do if you could find no enemy? What would you crave for if everything you wanted were everything you had? What would all those awfully beautiful stories about? 
What would we talk about if we couldn't talk about our disapproval towards the fact that we can't talk about all the things we don't want to happen? 

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