Peer Review by Crescent (United States)

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December of a not so popular/mean girl

By: Skyla Heston

To me, December is quite different from other teenagers. It means staying at home in my room in front of my laptop. It's nice that I had my personal laptop otherwise  I would have died till now. Its my only friend . I forgot to mention about my diary, it is also  my friend. I think without these two my life could be more worst.    Anyway, in December most of the teenagers have plans with their family, relatives and friends so do my friends (actually they aren't really my friend, we only just read in same school). But my case is different from others. My parents don't have time for me as they remain busy with their work and I don't have any friends. Truly people don't consider me as a friend but I don't know why. Maybe I am not capable of being their friend or because I am a looser. They think I am worthless, so, even if they become my friends they eventually leave  me. In my life nothing is real, only anime and my diary is real. So, I love to spend my time with them. I think only they can understand me even though they can't speak to me. But they are better than the people around me. So, when most of my friends have fun with their family or do parties with their friends in December I watch anime or write in my diary as it gives me much pleasure and I also read story books.   And this is how December ends in my life. I won't say I enjoy it but don't even hate it. I love the winter morning. In my country snowfall doesn't occur but I would love to see it one day. I like to spend December in my own way making it different from others, enjoying its beauty. So, its also special to me.      

This is how December ends in a dork's life.............

Peer Review

I like the conversational tone, but be careful that it doesn't go overboard.

It means time to do whatever you like.

I express my concerns in the highlights to the left.

I do not feel satisfied by the ending. I need more. Concerns are expressed in the highlights.

Hey, keep at it! You like to write in your diary, and now you write on Write the World. :D Keep striving to improve. Also, perhaps talk to those "friends" and your "family"? I hope you find more meaning in life! :D

Reviewer Comments

Sorry for the late response!

One thing that I can't say in any lighter terms is to make sure you know when to indent. When faced with a wall of text, readers will feel intimidated!

There are some places where you have a lot of extra spaces (from pressing the space bar). Please look over those and fix them!