Peer Review by sKRUwriting (India)

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Flute

By: Vani Desabhotla


FREE WRITING

A cold, steel instrument, which greets my heart warmly.
A shy instrument, meek in its ways.
It creeps in discreetly, softly and quietly.
Without anyone's knowledge, never once asking for praise.

A shy instrument, meek in its ways
but when played by many, never ceases to surprise.
Without anyone's knowledge, never once asking for praise.
It can create anticipation, terror or mimic the sunrise.

But when played by many, never ceases to surprise.
A weak thing it may seem, and not at all bright.
It can create anticipation, terror or mimic the sunrise.
One day, they shall inherit the earth, as was their birthright.

A weak thing it may seem, and not at all bright.
It creeps in discreetly, softly and quietly.
One day, they shall inherit the earth, as was their birthright.
A cold steel instrument, which greets my heart warmly.


Peer Review

"One day, they shall inherit the earth, as was their birthright." It stood out so much for me because well, firstly, it doesn't go with the flow of the poem, it seemed so out of place when I first read it.


I imagined an orchestra playing but wit just one flute way back at the end, so I think you really put across your point perfectly, good job!


Its kind of fascinating how you chose the flute, in this fast moving- EDM loving generation, the flute has truly lost its importance, so what really was your inspiration?


Reviewer Comments

I think its wonderful hoe efficiently you have personified the instrument, calling it shy and all. good job!
yours,\
Kruthi.