camlily

United States

hi there

Message to Readers

Comments, peer reviews, even just a like would be so helpful for me!!! Thanks <3 <3 <3

Silence

November 18, 2018

FREE WRITING

7
There's a long silence. 
You can feel the air between your bodies, thick with unspoken thoughts and desires.  You sit there, staring out the window as cars whiz by.  You try to ignore his presence.  His eyes tickle the back of your neck, willing you to say something.  You'd rather wait in the silence, however awkward it may be. 
His breath is too loud.  You turn your head in annoyance, but quickly look back out the window as his mouth opens as if to say something.  He can deal with the quiet. After all, he'd let it come between you for too many years.  
He turns onto Winter's Avenue, brows furrowing.  You can tell he wants to say something, but you will him not to.  Instead, you reach your hand towards the radio and turn on your favorite station.  The sound of music fills the car.  It's your favorite song- which happens to be his, too.  
You suddenly remember one of your first dates, dancing to the same song in your bedroom.  You were so carefree then.  So in love.  So sure that you were soulmates, destined to marry and have children together.  You sneak a glance at his face. It's evident that he remembers that night too, with his hands gripped around the steering wheel so tightly that his knuckles have turned white.  You look away.  The song ends.  He looks at you, starts to say something, and-

crash. bang.  A mixture of colors bursts in front of your eyes; first white, then red, then pitch-black as your vision fades away.  You hear his voice in a whisper- "claire"- but the silence overtakes you and whisks you away.
It's been a while since I wrote a short story, and I know it could use a lot of improvements.  Comments would be much appreciated!! ;)  Thank you <3 <3 
~have a wonderful day filled with sunshine and rainbows~

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8 Comments
  • camlily

    haha yeah it was a car crash!! And thank youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <3333333


    over 1 year ago
  • CreativeAngel

    DON’T LEAVE ME AT A CLIFFHANGER!
    I WANT TO KNOW
    A CRASH? WHAT HAPPENED????
    I loved this so much! <3


    over 1 year ago
  • Quille

    If you were interested in reading more, I have up to Chapter 5 published :)
    Wanted to let you know, you should be getting a review for this piece soon. Keep up your great work! :D


    over 1 year ago
  • camlily

    I would love to!


    over 1 year ago
  • Quille

    Would you please check out Elfboy chapter 1 ? I would really appreciate that :)


    over 1 year ago
  • camlily

    Thank you both so much!!!!!! <3


    over 1 year ago
  • Quille

    Wow! This was well written--Keep a'going! God Bless :D


    over 1 year ago
  • RNE

    I want more!!!!


    over 1 year ago