Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.
Message to Readers
Literally, whatever the fuck you want.
The entire piece delighted me, as I always love reading pieces talking about a past trip or vacation.
I'd like to know the name of the girl, "she lived halfway across the country from me." Where did she live (Like what state, city, or country)?
Well done on your first piece. Keep writing, and your works will improve!
Always write free,