Peer Review by inkyscribbles (United States)

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Questions

By: ancientvoices


PROMPT: Turned to Stone

I rested my head up against the train window and watched the train station slowly disappeared out of veiw. A single tear rolled down my cheek as I watched my parents fade with the station. I knew where I was going. I knew my fate. Nothing could change that. I was going to die. But would I die putting up a fight, or would I die curled up in a ball of submission? That was the question that lingered in my head as the rain began pattering on my window. 

This might be extended into a full story but I’m not sure yet. The title won’t remain the same, though. Can anyone guess what the time period is? I didn’t give much clues bc it was short but tell me your ideas in the comments, thanks!

Peer Review

A young lady (assumed) who is being transported somewhere and doesn’t know exactly what’s going to happen to her.


How clearly the writer is able to draw out the setting through her words. You can almost see the tear rolling down her cheek, her forehead pressed against the window as her parents fade from view.


“That was the question that remained in my head as the rain began pattering on my window”


This piece just gives a dark and forlorn mood that makes you want to reach out to the narrator.


I feel very grateful that I have my parents and I begin to think about what others may go through and what I should do about it.


Reviewer Comments

Stunning work, keep writing to change the world