Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.
"Creeping and carving the throats, Stealing and ringing the necks, Tiptoeing and guillotining the heads..." These lines surprised me. These lines were written so perfectly with a dark side; i'm at a loss of words.
If a work is written as a poem, I think a few words-if correctly placed- ignites emotion, and doesn't need further explanation. These lines were well put and the description, amazing. Nothing needs to be added, just try looking at my suggestions on your piece!
You are very talented, continue to write and improve!