Peer Review by Kaitlyn Hanson (United States)

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What Helps

By: Norah


FREE WRITING

poetry helps sometimes
when my stomach is sicker
than my gut punch anger

it feels more appropriate than maybe
what i would say
to be polite

to be civil

it is the shape of texts to friends
it is the shape of the bile in the back of my throat
it is the shape of a mother in pain

children help sometimes
the act of caring for them
of seeing them through even a singular moment
of their lives

i have the answers to her questions
about words and their meanings
about the speed of her bicycle through a puddle

it rained today
and the residential parking lot
next to her house is an ocean

and i forget
and i forget
and i forget


Message to Readers

light. love. hope. take care of yourself and others. sometimes things help. sometimes things can give you hope.


Peer Review

I like the way your poem skips around like it's the thoughts you think, the ideas swirling in your head.


I think you should add more detail about how you feel. you should deepen what causes such bad feelings to float to the surface. I think if you were more specific in parts it would hold the attention of the reader longer.


Reviewer Comments

overall i think its pretty great, i would think about what you have and try and see if yoiu can keep a theme throughout the poem and make it deep and obvious