JadeAndSerpentine

United States

I am an aspiring writer who loves reading (and creating) tales of fantasy and adventure, writing poetry, and exploring new genres. I hope that some day I will become a decent writer, but one step at a time!

Considering being active again...

Message to Readers

I mean... it's not like my poetry ever follows punctuation or formatting rules.

Anyways, thanks for reading this. As always, all feedback, comments, and questions are appreciated.

Have a great day, folks!

untitled

September 24, 2018


ever    so    soft
   her lips    
   touch mine
ever    so    beautiful
   her eyes
   meet mine
ever    so    subtle
   she whispers
   to me
   "I love you, but I have to leave."

Print

See History
  • September 24, 2018 - 5:05pm (Now Viewing)

Login or Signup to provide a comment.

14 Comments
  • acrosstheskysky

    ahhh i love how short yet powerful this is! the use italics makes it even more poetic!


    over 1 year ago
  • JadeAndSerpentine

    Yaaaaaaaaaay!!! Thank you so much RNE!


    over 1 year ago
  • RNE

    Your work is seriously awesome ! (p.s now you have 60 followers! YAY!!! /(^ U^)/ )


    over 1 year ago
  • JadeAndSerpentine

    :D


    almost 2 years ago
  • Aarushikrishnan

    So many feels :'(


    almost 2 years ago
  • JadeAndSerpentine

    @Gabriel Goodwin (if you ever see this):

    Thank you!!! Your comments made me so happy! I'm glad you like my username. It just kinda popped into my head one day, and I was like, that sounds cool :)


    almost 2 years ago
  • Gabriel Goodwin

    And and anndddddd also, JadeAndSerpentine sounds badass I dunno why! It sounds really cool like they're the besterest of friendssss (on purpose XD)

    Princess Mononoke is L I F E


    almost 2 years ago
  • Gabriel Goodwin

    This is really good! There's really something beautiful about short pieces and this piece stands out because of that!

    And btw, thanks so much for the comment, I feel empowered to keep writing!


    almost 2 years ago
  • Catlover

    Wanted to let you know about my upcoming book club:
    https://writetheworld.com/groups/1/shared/85966/version/163019


    almost 2 years ago
  • Johanna

    WHY!! The twist in the end... this is so beautifully written, and the structure and spacing is amazing. I just want to tell you that I love your profile picture- Princess Mononoke is LIFE


    almost 2 years ago
  • JadeAndSerpentine

    Thank you!!!


    almost 2 years ago
  • Luna Lemon

    Awww.... this is so beautiful! This was such a short, bittersweet poem. The italicized lines really stand out and I love how you used the prompt. The format really enhanced the poem and I love your word choice that created a calming, yet melancholic tone(soft, subtle, whispers, etc) and of course that beautifully heartbreaking last line.
    This was a great take on the prompt! Amazing job:)


    almost 2 years ago
  • JadeAndSerpentine

    Thank you!


    almost 2 years ago
  • Carpizza

    I love how simplistic yet beautifully written this is! The repetition of ever so with the use of italics really brings in the emotion of this piece.


    almost 2 years ago