Peer Review by Kristoff Misquitta (United States of America)

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Antonym

By: Mona Ster


FREE WRITING

Let your thoughts sink in
And your feelings rise out.


Peer Review

This piece has a calm, relaxed, meditative mood. However, it paints a chaotic, energetic picture. "Feelings rise out" seems euphemistic: it could depict anger or frustration even if it is a soft word. The duality of this expression is surprising and thought-provoking.


To provide more context and a concrete ending, you may want to add a new, one-line stanza that describes the characters involved or explains the use of the word "feelings." It wouldn't distract from the simplicity of the poem, but it would complete it as a poetic story rather than a fragment.


Reviewer Comments

This is a surprisingly powerful sentence! Dividing it into two lines instead of adding a comma greatly amplifies the contrast. The title, "Antonym," though abstract, makes sense in the larger message of the poem. It is sufficiently vague to capture attention, but it still summarizes the opposing viewpoints expected to be found in the piece. Amazing work!