Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.
Message to Readers
PLEASE READ THIS REAL SLOW SO THAT EVERY LITTLE BIT SINKS INTO YOU PROPERLY. Wouldn't want you missing anything out. Enjoy!!! and feedback always appreciated:))
So so many things. Just as a start, the title itself is a good choice as the 'You' addresses the reader and pulls them in. The tone as well is really well laid out, as it evokes a certain languid feeling at the start, free of any worries and fears. Then that sudden realisation that clouds weren't fluffy and the sky wasn't actually blue gave that sudden contrasting switch in tone from one of relaxation to one of almost despair in some way. You have also managed to use words that trigger the emotions of the reader, whether they fit perfectly into the scenario or if they're placed in the perfect spot for our eyes to stumble upon.
I'd like to know, what exactly inspired you to write this? Was it a spur of the moment kind of thing or was this piece carefully planned out? What did you feel when writing this, and did you use any of your own experiences as a muse?
This really demanded slow reading, because the sheer weight and meaning behind the words was definitely something that needed to sink in. You wrote a piece that makes the reader themselves reflect, and that's something that can be rather hard to do. Not only that, but the fluidity of the language and tone carries the reader along with your words, and it almost feels like a journey that had been taken when I came to the end. I will be thinking about this for the next few hours, that's for sure. This was a breathtaking piece to read, and I congratulate you on creating this gem. That said, have a good day!