Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.
I admire the authors voice. The writing flows so well, and is a pleasure to read. The syntax and diction carries the reader through the story instead of presenting a stumbling block to overall understanding.
I am disconcerted when others take lightly things that are of some consequence. I like to have a plan and stick with it.
I think the balance of scene and reflection is just about right. The reflective moments are active enough and the scene moments don’t overwhelm the reader. If I had to ask for more of one, I’d say a bit more of some active scenes (active meaning think about verb choice, I suppose), but I think the current balance is effective.
I think the acceptance and reflection the author presents at the ending sums up the narrative well and leaves the reader satisfied.
As you have done in this narrative, continue to make stories out of seemingly small moments. I appreciate how this narrative wasn’t just about some earth-shattering event; rather, it told of a simple yet important moment.
Thank you for sharing your story!