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i have almost no idea what i write, it happens in a trance, possibly under the influence of music and some orange juice


December 28, 2015


     The modern carousel emerged from early jousting traditions in Europe and the Middle East. Knights would gallop in a circle while tossing balls from one to another; an activity that required great skill and horsemanship. 

    (They perhaps died eventually from falling off.)

    We chased each other back and forth, rocking like a viking boat under the day that drained the sun of its pink and orange hues. Lullaby, soft, undisturbed peace in our hearts. Small and kittenish, mewls and ticklish, I knew he was mine and mine only.
    Unpracticed and careless, we let our hearts guide ourselves, not knowing it was what got us stabbed upon the golden horse made of butterfly wings. It ended as fast as it took for the sun to set. 

    In chaos theory, the butterfly effect is the sensitive dependence on initial conditions in which a small change in one state of a deterministic nonlinear system can result in large differences in a later state.

    You were so beautiful, I was so scared. Your flickering breaths as we kissed the first time, I remember brushing your long hair away from your eyes, shaking.
    Deep, unknown and a few rays of sunlight punchered it's darkness. I realised much later on, that the light came from me. You, my dear, you were my darkness, my cold and beautiful universe while I was the sun that illumated our pumping hearts. That was the last time we kissed. 

    As the flowers most often associated with funerals, lilies symbolise that the soul of the departed has received restored innocence after death.

    I "am broken, empty, dark and void. She took my light. And she now rises." 

Facts were gathered from Google. 


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