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Message to Readers

Any feedback is welcome! I'm never published any of my writing before, so I would love to receive constructive criticism from anyone. Thanks, and I hope you enjoyed!

light we cannot see

June 26, 2018

she feels like her lungs are glass balloons
that are slowly deflating 
and breaking
slicing her heart 
and stomach
and liver
and kidneys
the way shattered ribs would,
and though she knows why she feels this way
(you're processing grief, the doctor says)
she is simply
too tired
to care why
(why she is grieving for a man who never loved her)
or how 
(people still ask her how someone like her ever loved someone like him)
because it doesn't
her father 
(a person whose caring ruined her life more than his absence ever could have)
is dead, and she should be 
but instead,
she is aching with grief,

and it fills her hollow, empty lungs
and she just doesn't understand
how it all ended up like this
(you're processing grief, the doctor says)...

she mourns for a monster,
and she can't forgive herself for that
(forgiveness is for the weak, her father once said)

and she is just like him, in the end,
because her grief makes her a monster 
in the same way that his once did


See History
  • June 26, 2018 - 1:44pm (Now Viewing)

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  • Scarshidestories

    This is the ending!

    over 2 years ago
  • L.Walker

    Absolutely beautiful. :)

    over 2 years ago

    Wow. This is really beautiful; I love the last three stanzas especially, it's really well-written and really conveys the feeling behind it. Great job.

    over 2 years ago
  • Catlover


    over 2 years ago
  • Maya!

    wow i am speechless! this is amazing work.... keep it up :)

    over 2 years ago
  • ALangford

    this is such a beautiful poem, i'm sort of in love with it - stylistically it's really well-delivered, it achieves perfect clarity and the conclusive last stanza ties the whole thing off so perfectly. super well done for this, definitely one of the best poems I've read on the site in a while

    over 2 years ago