Peer Review by Tofu(づ。◕‿‿◕。)づ (Canada)

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Seasick

By: Maya!


FREE WRITING

The roar of the sea came back to me
In my ears
My body
Felt as though
The shells that I have
Known so well
Were sinking into my bones and making
Every fibre of me tremble
Like ships that plunge 
And rumble
Through the night on a raging tide
I felt the ground leave me
My hands floated away
My hair stood up 
In response to the jellyfish
Stinging the back of my eyes
Maybe I am more prone to seasickness 
Than I thought
Though right now
I can’t think of doing anything
But letting the shower wash the salt
From my eyes
So maybe next time
(Maybe)
I’ll keep my ship disguised


Peer Review

Every fiber of me tremble. I like how the author uses fiber instead of bones or cells.


I'm actually quite seasick as well, so I feel like I can relate with the writer.


Have you ever been stung by a jellyfish before? I haven't


Reviewer Comments

Maybe you can make stanzas instead of just one big stanza.