Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.
Message to Readers
Can you help tell me what makes a good story or overall what I should improve
I love the fact that the author is trying to spread the message: Global warming is harmful.
Humans could actually be in danger because of our carelessness.
The story idea is great but could be put in more detail. Things were just happening. There wasn't really any dialogue for us to understand what the characters were going through.
It was like... "On day 1, Bob had cancer. On day 2, Bob was dying of cancer. On day 3, Bob died of cancer." So how did Bob feel? Did Bob feel happy that he was dying? Or sad that he might never get to see his kids?
This story is great, and with a few tweaks, it could be even better. I can't wait to see how this story turns out in the end.
To make your story look better to the eyes, I suggest adding an indent. I always add three spaces to the start of my paragraph as indents.