Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.
The very first line is my favourite: "Wilt thou wonder on the sheer lack of time?" It sounds as if one of the Romantics wrote it! This line is lyrical and really makes one think. It's wonderful that you are able to start a poem with such a hook.
This poem is about Shakespeare. The concept of time is relevant because Shakespeare lived and died many centuries ago.
Just a couple last comments: "thou" in the title should be "thy." The possessive of "thou" is "thy." ("Thine" is used instead of "thy" when the thing being owned begins with a vowel: "thy voice"; "thine eyes." If the possessive pronoun and possessed object(s) are separated by a modifier that does not begin with a vowel, then "thy" is used: "thy very eyes.")
In all, I like and agree with the theme of this poem. You clearly show your love for Shakespeare and his profound effect on literature to this day. You are also experimenting with archaic voice, which is a bold endeavor. I'd suggest you read more books and poems (not necessarily Shakespeare) that have such voice so that you may become more familiar with how it is used. Tolkien's "The Silmarillion" is a good example of archaic speech, for one.
Lastly, I want you to know that, if I have sounded harsh in my review, I sincerely apologize. It's really just because I am so excited to read your poem and to try to help you, so maybe it sounds like I am shouting and demanding. You certainly do not need to take all of my suggestions; just take whatever you find useful and forget the rest. All the same, I have tried to comment thoughtfully, to make you think about not only how you may strengthen this poem, but any other of your poems. I hope I have succeeded.
Thank you for writing this, purplpeanut (I'm sorry I don't know your real name). Have a lovely day!