This place doesn’t scare me. It’s all meant to be scary, to induce harm to the mind, to twist it and mangle it until it’s too afraid to keep going. But to a girl who's lost her mind already many times before, this is nothing.
I feel bad for this monster, in a way. These monsters that try to lurk in alleys are all just trying to be more than they truly are… they’re trying to live up to the imagined “monster.” They are trying to be part of the common world, to be part of another person’s problem. Even those who are heartless don’t feel like they are enough.
So this monster is nothing to be afraid of. This one will be easy to fight and to destroy. This one is just trying to be like all of the others, and I’ve recognized that. The first step is recognition.
Now I just have to fight it. I know its weakness. It's almost as if I can feel it in my mind. I just have to fight it.
I can see it. Arms grabbing, writhing, deep red eyes that are trying to grab on to me like vines. I can feel it in my mind. I can see it in my mind. I can fight it.
I’m just trying to be like all the others. I’m not going to be overcome by this monster inside me. I’ve never been afraid of this before… this is another person’s problem, not mine. I can fight it.
Even as the arms crawl around me, and my mind becomes mangled, fighting itself, killing itself, even as the world starts to collapse, I tell myself that I can fight this. I’m not a monster. This is another person’s problem, not mine.