Peer Review by Lopiekins (United States)

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A Perfect Christmas

By: izagrace04

    I wake up on Christmas morning, bubbling with joy. It is only 5am. I am to excited to sit still, but my parents said not to wake them up until 6am. I jump out of bed and dash to the living room. I see presents, one large and one small. My beautiful stocking my grandmother made is hanging above the fireplace, overflowing with goodies. I smell cinnamon and nutmeg, remnants of last nights hot chocolate. I pace around, anxious. Only 20 minutes have passed. I run to my room and plug in my Christmas lights. I put on my beautiful Christmas Dress and curl my hair. Only 15 more minutes! I rush to the kitchen and put on a pot of coffee for my mom and dad, so they have less to do. Finally, 6am! I run into their room and shake them awake. They take a long time to get out of bed and get fully woken up. Finally, we huddle into the living room. My mom lights a fire, while me and my dad sit and sip hot cocoa and coffee. First, I pull out my gifts for my parents. They open them with care and thank me. Then, eagerly, I open my stocking. Craft supplies, candy and more fall out. At the very bottom is in orange, which is a tradition in our family. I open the big present, and then the little one. I hug my mom and dad, exactly what I wanted. We then cuddle by the fire and read the Christmas story. Soon, it’s time for a yummy meal of chicken, cranberry sauce and eggnog. We laugh and eat. Soon, it starts snowing, and my dad and I go outside and go sledding. We run back inside after hours of play, and my mom has more hot cocoa for us. We cuddle by the fire once more, and watch a Christmas movie, falling asleep as the sun gets drowned out by darkness.

I am an only child, so Christmas is an extra special holiday. My dad takes work off, there is no school, and we just have time as a family! I'd love to know if you have any feedback!

Peer Review

All of the above!

It means special time with family.

It was a perfect scene, but I think if you enter this you may want to add a little reflection at the end.

It ended the story very well, but see above question and answer.

You can paint any picture you want when you write. I've read several of your stories, and you're also very good at gently introducing a belief to the reader and thoroughly explaining it. Keep it up!

Reviewer Comments

I can totally relate to this piece! I'm the oldest of four, but I remember several years back, being woken up at four in the morning by an over excited younger sister. She couldn't fall asleep again, and we had almost five hours until we could get my parents up. I played Lalaloopsies for hours with her and we fantasized about our presents. Please review my December prompt story, Holiday Magic!