Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.
"Her heart was being squished into a tiny lead ball that rolled around in her chest." I thought this was an unusual, refreshing way to say a character's heart is beating fast. It reminded me of one of those little wooden handheld games, where you have to lead a tiny metal ball through a maze into the correct hole (I hope you know what I'm talking about?) I mention this because I thought the connection was really clever between the way you described the way Regina felt and the sensation of texting someone, waiting for a risky answer. When you repeat the motif of the lead ball and the tiny grey dots, it almost feels like the anxiety Regina feels inside is reflected back at her on her phone screen.
I am left feeling happy for Regina, because I think she has a lot of character development in this piece. Like I said, I enjoyed the ending of your story and the fact that Regina is okay with things not going the way she wishes they would with Drew, because she has learned to work through her problems and move on.
I think the way you formatted this piece, in many small separate scenes, was a cool structural style for a story. Is there a reason you chose to write this in third person, rather than doing it in first person and alternating the narrator from scene to scene?
I think one of the strongest aspects of this piece is the dialogue. It is well written and realistic, and I can imagine overhearing these conversations in a school or Starbucks. You've constructed their conversations in a way that reveal a lot about each character in a small amount of time. I like that you include minor, everyday details of conversations, because it makes them feel all the more real.
I also really enjoyed your narration style. I like the way it switches between feeling formal and omnipresent to the very intimate details it gives about each character (like the way Regina describes herself as pessimistic and mean, but its said in third person rather than first person).
Great job with this piece! :)