Peer Review by ollieollie (United States)

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No Need To Try

By: Stewart Worthington

PROMPT: Writing Small

I couldn't stop the consequence of my laughter. My cheeks went red at each uncontrollable and high-pitched yelp. “If you hiccup again, I’ll kiss you.” They were nothing if not clever. I used every muscle in my stomach to urge the sound again. It was hopeless – but not needed.

Message to Readers

I'd appreciate any feedback for this piece and thanks for reading!

Peer Review

I like the fact that there's a small amount of dialogue. A lot of these don't have it, and you made it interesting and necessary.

I would want to know what the narrator was laughing about.

Reviewer Comments

I think this was really smart. Adding a bit of personality to the hiccups made it almost like an awkward third wheel, which was funny to visualize.