Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.
The line that stands out the most to me is, "I see you in the way the moon kisses the skyline when it is lonely." This line is particularly memorable in that the combination of imagery and nature personification just work so well together in crafting a sublime image.
After reading this piece, I am left feeling sympathetic for the speaker, as it seems that he/she is apologizing to a loved one that he/she now sees in everything. In other words, the speaker can't seem to get someone out of his/her mind.
Why does the author use this particular structure with the three sections, the first and third being very short?
Overall, I love the writer's references to grand aspects of nature such as the "waves that come crashing onto the shore" or the moon that "kisses the skyline" as well as his/her references to quite simple things like "the syrup of pancakes". In this sense, the reader attains a sincere idea of just how obsessed with the "you" the speaker is, and the reader can't help but feel sympathetic for him/her. For a future draft, I would love to see the writer just incorporate more images like the one with the moon kissing the skyline. In explanation, more of these grand, personified images of nature will really bolster the piece even more. But ultimately, I did very much enjoy reading this piece, as the author did a very good job at expressing the feelings of a speaker who seems to be in love. Great job!