Peer Review by scarlet. (United States)

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Tendrils

By: amalahmed1008


FREE WRITING

1:Of Anxiety
A terrible tendril of anxiety
I couldn't move
Through the daily debacle
I wanted to be unstuck

I couldn't move
Everything was dark
I wanted to be unstuck
Hands quickly quivering

Everything was dark
Pulsing heart
Hands quickly quivering
Fidgety fingers, sweaty palms

Pulsing heart
Through the daily debacle
Fidgety fingers, sweaty palms
A terrible tendril of anxiety

2:Of Comfort
A twinkly tendril of comfort
I sunk in
Forgetting all my frets
Everything was okay

I sunk in
Tiny little hand squeezes
Everything was okay
1,2,3, breathe

Tiny little hand squeezes
Slippery tears slide away
1,2,3 breathe
I smiled

Slippery tears slide away
Forgetting all my frets
I smiled
A twinkly tendril of comfort

3:Of Calm
A tranquil tendril of calm
No words said
Heartbeats heard
Eyes fluttered shut

No words said
Little circles rubbed
Eyes fluttered shut
Not a single thought

Little circles rubbed
The safety of silence
Not a single thought
Everything was okay

The safety of silence
Heartbeats heard
Everything was okay
A tranquil tendril of calm
 


Message to Readers

comments please!


Peer Review

Two lines stood out to me actually. 1. "I wanted to be unstuck" struck me, and it's hard to explain why exactly. Basically, being stuck isn't something I would have ever connected to anxiety, but after reading this I can't think of anything better to describe that feeling. 2. "The safety of silence" because most people take comfort in noise, but after having an episode of anxiety like described, silence does feel safe.


I feel like I've just had an anxiety attack, and been brought out of it by someone I trust, truthfully. Reading this, for me, meant living it for like 20 seconds.


What was your inspiration to write this/what is it about?


Reviewer Comments

This piece is spot on. I love the repetition in it, the word choice, everything about it. I have no criticism.