Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.
Message to Readers
Here's a prologue that inspired me to start writing a book. Please tell me what you think.
Very interesting! You do a good job of introducing your character, establishing an idyllic scene, and then shattering that in a way that makes me want to learn more about the world and about the characters and forces involved. There are few grammar things to look at, but please continue writing this story!