Dipper triangle

shir

{shir lev / ♂ / infp} 15 y/o guy from texas, living in north carolina. reform jew. bi and asexual.

Message to Readers

This is a vignette I wrote as part of nanowrimo in 2014.

Sister of Orion

June 30, 2015

FREE WRITING

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Hazel tells everyone that she was born under the constellation of Orion. Orion, the son of Neptune and an Amazon queen. Born with immense power in his blood, he was a skilled hunter. Hazel tells everyone she meets that she is the long lost sister of Orion. She says she has the strength of Orion and then some- because her mother the Amazon queen blessed her especially. Hazel tells everyone this and she puffs up her chest like a blowfish (she would know, her father being the king of the sea), but they can’t see her deflated when she comes home. I see her curled up on the couch and I say Mama you don’t look much like a warrior right now and she says baby, soon you will understand but still I don’t understand.

Her real parents weren’t gods or queens and they weren’t even lawyers or doctors. Her father was a high school teacher at the bad school that mothers pull their children away from and her mother cleaned houses on the weekends and stayed at home the rest of the time, having babies and babies and babies. Hazel was one of seven children and sometimes she felt like she was drowning but she still smiles and tells everyone “It’s okay, I dealt with the competition. I was always born to be a star.” And everyone smiles and laughs because Hazel is a success story to them and that makes her history bearable.

Hazel studied like an owl, eyes open late at night when everyone was sleeping or out on the clubs. She was always at home, reading her chemistry textbook like it was a novel because she knew that it would do her good. She tells everyone she can see the future. It’s just another perk of not being mortal, she says. She can tell what’s going to work. No one really knows if its true, but they do know that Hazel did good by studying, because when she was seventeen and her two best friends were pregnant and sad like a stormy sea, she got her first college acceptance letter.

That letter went up on the fridge and there it stayed, because Hazel opted for another college, a college farther away. And she kissed her father’s forehead and felt the wrinkles under her lips and said “Papa, I’ve got to go far away but I will come home, I promise, and I will bring back what we need”.And then she took a late train with her one bag and she never came back. She leaves so much sometimes I wonder if she will leave me but she tells me she won’t and she kisses my head like she kissed her father’s.

Her papa died of a heart attack when she was in her second year of college, and her mother soon followed. Hazel’s heart broke for them, but she just smiled and told everyone that her parents were looking down on her and they had a really good spot from heaven and so she needed to give them a good show. So she put her head back in the books like she had them in high school and she worked and worked until she had graduated.

Hazel became a nurse (she told everyone that she could heal patients by kissing their foreheads) and fell in love with a reporter from California. When she first told me her kisses were magic I asked her why they didn’t heal her father and she got a faraway look on her eyes and I said sorry but then she kissed my head again and again and again and told me no one would ever die on her hands again. The reporter was named Harry and he had big ideas and bigger hair and Hazel feel deeply madly in love with him. They were married soon but no one knows how soon because Hazel says she forgets. She says time is different when you’re in love and everyone sighs and we all believe her.

Hazel’s wedding was the grandest event ever. She tells the story grander and grander each time. There was royalty in attendance and her father (Neptune, not Papa) made an appearance and blessed everyone with good godly luck and an intricate ice sculpture. And the reporter whose name was Harry kissed her under the high arches of the church in front of everybody including the Queen of England (who was quite appalled) and they all applauded until everyone in the entire state of Indiana was clapping for Hazel and Harry. And that night the stars were especially bright and Orion waved his celestial arm in recognition of his sister and he even admitted that she was a better hunter. Everyone cried and cried but they were happy and Hazel was the happiest of them all.

They moved into their own little house and it was blue and there were flowers in the front garden. Hazel sang to the flowers every morning and her breath watered them and they grew- at least, that’s what she tells everybody. Harry just laughs and says his wife is such a joker and then they kiss at the dinner party and everyone starts to clap again.

They lived like that for a while and Hazel had her nurse friends and Harry had his reporter friends and they went to Harry’s home in California for vacation but one day all that stopped. Like a bullet. That’s how it went. That’s how Hazel said it went. Sometimes I wonder- did I ruin it? Did I ruin their happiness? Was it my fault? But she just shushes me like she always does and she tells me stories about her brother made of stars.

Hazel was pregnant and there was celebration and champagne and birthday showers and maternity leave and Harry spun her around careful as he could and it was all glittering happy like diamonds. Hazel tells everyone that she sang the baby her favorite songs when he was sleeping and when he came out he was singing an old Spanish lullaby. Her eyes twinkle when she tells everyone this, and everyone is enchanted as they should be.

The baby didn’t inherit Hazel’s charm or Harry’s wit, but they loved him all the same. They cherished him and they cherished their life and their voices sparkled like champagne and love was handed out on the street corner. Those were the good days. The happy days. The everybody-smiles-when-Hazel-tells-it days. The baby grew to be almost six before the happy says ended. I don’t remember them ending. I don’t remember the happy days much at all, and I feel guilty when I say this to her but she says its okay- says its common. Calls it a symptom. Dissects it like frogs.

The day Hazel got the news, all the breath left her, and a puff of starlight came out her mouth and she crumpled to the floor. Thats what they say- that she fell on the floor and when she came up she wasn’t the same ever again. Her sparkle was gone and she tried to regain it but the only way she can get it back is to think about the good days but the doctor days she needs to move on so she sits on the couch and looks out the window and looks at the street and looks at her kid and looks and looks but she never really ever saw again.

We need you to identify a body, they said, and then Hazel screamed and screamed but she went all the same and sure enough there he was- Harry, charming-romantic-kiss-you-in-the-rain Harry, laid across a cold chrome table like a science experiment. There was glass embedded in his skin and when Hazel tells everybody this story her voice breaks as she says, “I could feel every shard as if it was inside me. I felt too much.” Everyone pats her on the shoulder and she grins though her tears and they think, it’s okay. Our Hazel, she’s endured so much, and she is still standing.

But they don’t know that she stands on crutches and barely then, pills that keep her from drowning but she hasn’t yet learned to swim. I see your pills. I see them and I kiss them when you don’t see because maybe my kisses are healers too. Hazel’s a fighter, that one. That’s what they say, and they’re right. Hazel is a warrior. But she’s been wounded, and sometimes you get hurt so much you can’t ever fight again.

When Hazel tells everyone about her brother Orion she tells them how he’s a great hunter (though she’s better). She tells them how their parents are grand and how their grandness helps her and she is strong like an army. But she doesn’t tell the whole story.

There’s a reason Orion is up in the stars and not here on Earth. Orion was killed. The great warrior, sent to the grave. It wasn’t another warrior, or an army, or even a great boar that killed Orion. In the end, it was a small scorpion, just tiny and insignificant enough to topple over the greatest (second greatest) hunter in all of the world.

Maybe Orion and Hazel have more alike than even she wants to admit. Maybe her great strength was zapped by a small little thing. After so much suffering, everyone thought Hazel could survive it all. And she could. Hazel-from-before could do anything she wanted. But the gods don’t like it when someone gets too powerful, too content. So they sent a scorpion, and they striked Hazel out. Maybe that’s what she should say, but instead she says nothing at all. She doesn’t say anything about being broken- ever.

She tries her hardest to put that twinkle back in her eye and that skip in her step because warriors like her are never defeated. Maybe instead she should admit that she was defeated. Maybe it would help her. Or maybe it wouldn’t. No one knows how Hazel gets by. But no matter how much she cries at night and no matter how loud she laughs when friends come over, there will never be a hero like Hazel. No one stronger, no one wiser, no one grander, no one more loved than Hazel. And that’s how it was written in the stars all those years ago.

This was the first chapter of my abandoned nanowrimo from 2014. Previously published on figment. I'm putting some of my old work up to show what my writing is like :)

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