Peer Review by Abelle17 (Nigeria)

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I Love You, Though it May Seem I Don’t

By: Jesica


FREE WRITING

You were like a childhood friend, 
we went way back. 
Our stories and memories, 
It’s happiness we didn’t lack.

Yet now, I look at you,
As I do, a stranger.
I feel the insides of me groan,
I can sense the danger.

It’s so different now with you,
I hate to think it’s true.
But each time I look at you,
The bright light now seems blue.
 
When I look in your eyes,
I sense the sadness deep within.
I’m so sorry I couldn’t be better,
I’ve caused the pain you are in.

When I see the younger you,
You never waisted a laugh.
But now I see you smiling,
I feel my heart tear apart.

You smile like you mean it,
You assure you are ok.
But there’s that little sadness,
That creeps in each day. 

I’m sorry i’ve been different,
I’m sorry I treat you this way.
I can’t even begin to forgive myself,
Could you love me anyway?

To all my family and friends: I LOVE YOU ALL!!
Jesus Loves You and I Do Too :)

Peer Review

Yet now, I look at you, As I do, a stranger. I feel the insides of me groan, I can sense the danger. It’s so different now with you, I hate to think it’s true. But each time I look at you, The bright light now seems blue. These two stanzas moved me deeply.


I would like to know the back story because stanza 6, line 3 is an intriguing one.


Reviewer Comments

This is a nice piece. Very relatable. Also your punctuation is good. Try to check your spellings so it won't convey a wrong message.