Peer Review by Rachel S. (United States)

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The Face of a Cliff

By: CCReed

PROMPT: Becoming Human

 I look up at his menacing figure,
His features I cannot seem to grasp,
Serene, stone-faced,
So calm and yet so fierce,
With one frail hand I reach up,
Digging my fingers into the creases on his forehead,
And the wrinkles in his cheeks,
That come with old age.
Yet he stands still,
As I grope with the other hand,
Climbing up,
Ever higher,
Feeling his rough skin beneath the palm of my hand,
And his furrowed brow holding my unsteady feet.
I marvel at his stubbornness,
That he refuses to move,
Even as the winds howl and beat upon him,
And the eagles swoop up above.
With one more reach of my hand,
I feel the peak of his balding head,
The scarcity of shrubs coming into my vision,
As I tumble over onto his scalp.
And I understand now,
Why he remains unmoving,
With this never ending landscape before me,
For who would want to leave this view?

Peer Review

"And his furrowed brow holding my unsteady feet" is my favorite. It's a really creative analogy.

It helps create a sense of old age, and it also helps embody the struggle the climber has to scale the cliff.

Reviewer Comments

I love this! You have an excellent command of creative verbs and imagery that really brings the poem to life. One suggestion I have is really picky, but honestly I'm not seeing any big problems. If I were you I would change "me" to "him" in the second to last line, so that the poem remains centered around him instead of the climber. Or, you could switch the third-to-last and second-to-last lines. I think that would help the final words flow more smoothly through the mind. Right now it's just a bit clunky.