Peer Review by Jeremy Houle (United States)

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Through the Clouds, We Shall Fly

By: Sunshine Rose Writer


PROMPT: Other Worldly

    There we stood, two giggling girls excited to finally reunite after months of not seeing each other.  We were the best of roommates with the funniest of memories, but she moved back home in November. . . now it was the hot month of June.  Night had fallen, but the air was still warm from the heat of the day, and the whipped cream fluffs in the sky had altered into blotchy black masses illuminated by the moon's fluorescent light.

    As my roommate, my partner-in-crime unzipped her Batman backpack (she is a complete batnerd), I could see her signature cutesy face and I knew she was about to unveil something wondrous and exciting from her teering crouch and her breathy laugh.  Then, she swept her prized possession from the cover of the backpack, and behold:  a slim, silver hoverboard.  I gasped and began to feel anticipation build from within.  Only my roommate could possess something so awesome and exciting.  Only my roommate could hold in her possession something with such potential for an adventure so magnificent as the idea which was unfolding in my mind.

    We brought the hoverboard to the middle of the street and stood with our feet in place, ready for adventure.  My roomie activated the board, and immediately we shot into the air and "Yellow Flicker Beat" by Lorde began to play, filling in the silence of night.  We shot off on the board and maneuvered through the air, through the clouds, disappearing and losing vision in the black moisturous clouds.

    We flew through the sky, oblivious to all else, both of us feeling as though we'd never been alive before this moment.  "Sharmalee!" I screamed, but the wind takes my breath away; my voice squeaks because I can't breathe.  Then all in a moment we are back.  It is over to soon.  We have landed and are gasping for the air that was stolen from our lungs.  All we do is stare at one another, my roommate and I, without words to say.  Our cheeks are painted berry red, as our senses return to us, but before we can even fully regain ourselves, we whisper in unison, "again."  Then, we're off again and darting through the sky.

"Sunny," I am awake; the dream is over.


Just to clarify, of course this is not a real experience.  This is a dream I had involving myself and my old roommate, Sharmalee.  We had many good memories together before she moved back home.  I dreamt about this last night, and thought it deserved to be shared.  Let me know what you think.


Message to Readers

This is a dream I had last night. I thought it was interesting, and wanted to share. Let me know what you think.


Peer Review

I thought the "signature cutesy face" was especially intriguing. It helps tie the readers emotion into the story by thinking of someone *they* know with a signature cutesy face.


Because it was a dream, of course there are parts that would be confusing because we aren't you. but the place where I was confused was... the whole last half of the last paragraph. but I read it again and I understand it now.


the signature cutesy line.


Reviewer Comments

I appreciate you sharing your dreams! haha the novel I am working on write now was inspired by a dream.