hi i'm jackson ;)

United States

look alive, sunshine
christian and queer
"It simply isn't a story worth telling if there aren't dragons" -JRRTolkien
genderfluid
slytherin
ENFP

Message to Readers

have you heard the new twenty one pilots heathens/trees song? im really feeling it rn

ow my heart

Lonely Soliloquy

September 14, 2021

FREE WRITING

1
sometimes, I feel alone.
echoing through an empty theater, trying to fall on unheeding ears.
there's already a knife in my throat, no need to twist it.
it hurts that this is the place I feel almost whole,
because I've felt the most lonely moments of my life here too.
when I was crying in the service,
feeling the immense shaking relief that I was finally there,
not around the suffocating pressure of family,
and none of you, sitting next to me, noticed
or cared.
these days I keep myself busy.
if I don't have time to think, I don't have time to feel.
if I don't feel, I don't have to think, and so on.
these days, it feels like someone's clawing from inside my chest,
wanting to see the light,
but if I eat a lot, it's sated for a little while.
if I distract myself with music, I don't need to put my own words to my thoughts.
I find myself constantly missing the me I want to be.

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  • September 14, 2021 - 9:17pm (Now Viewing)

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