evren jane

United States

notes app writer|| she/her || libra

Message from Writer

some favs:

"that is the problem. if she wanted to dance I would let her wreck the furniture. if she wanted to cook i would let her burn down the house. and if she wanted to scream i'd let her deafen me. I've never loved anyone enough to let them destroy me but God, she could take me by the throat and my eyes would sparkle at the mere inches between us." –distortionly (via tumblr)

"not everything is hopeless; we must hope for something." –Euripides

"there must be something strangely sacred in salt. It is in our tears and in the sea." –Khalil Gibran

"a mente cria an melencolia mil filosofias"

and finally, for whoever needs this:

"listen, are you breathing just a little, and calling it a life?" –mary oliver

I Am an Ember

August 27, 2021


there is fire. it burns with the heat I have been craving for too long now. it awakens a long-buried part of me that is ravenous. it wants more more more more more more more more
I stand alone, barefoot, the dirt rich and alive and there. It greets me, not as a long lost friend, but as something to be wary of. The plants of the meadow have long since run from me. They heed the dirt's warning of heat and drought, and left, their delicate petals and seeds floating away in the October breeze.
I look down, and for a moment, through the haze of crackling sparks, I can see the purple polish on my toenails, painted by Mina yesterday, though it feels like ages ago. Feels like a different girl who sat with her in our bedroom and gossiped. "It was another girl," I remind myself, my jaw tight and eyes gold.
they have all come now, and firefighters are trying to break through my wall, perhaps hoping to "rescue" me. the murmurs of the crowd echo through my head. too much. too much. the thought has barely registered before a column of fire tears towards the mob, shocking them into silence. "come back. come back please Elanor." I don't know who that girl is, salty tears tracking through the ash and soot coating her pale face. and for that matter, i don't know who elanor is either. elanor, elanor? who is elanor? a memory begins to spark, elanor. I am elanor. Or at least I was.
I do the only thing I can think of: through my head back and laugh, rising up into the sky, haloed with flame. I know my eyes have finally become the molten gold of my former self, and make sure the flash as I speak: "oh girl, if only Elanor existed. No, i am not elanor. I am a god"
I see their eyes widen and know they know i speak the truth.
for i am Hala, god of devourment, embers, and conquest.


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  • August 27, 2021 - 12:08am (Now Viewing)

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