Peer Review by 18ggill (United States)

Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.

Tap on comment to view. Using a mouse?

Hover over comments to view. On a touch device?


​Unafraid

By: Norah


Why is darkness surprising,
the ice and the brambles and the quiet,
wild way the wind whistles after dark.

The sky is not a monster under the bed,
only the gentle silk of morning,
and the charcoal of night.

Our fears are our own creation,
the river will roar and crash and kill,
but that is how it is,
and always has been,
blood is not spilt it is spent and
our hands can neither tame nor object
to nature. 

Only look, only touch, only know.

For, in recent memory,
the sun has risen every day 
and set every night.
The mountains will remain,
and the wildflowers will find a way,
despite staggering odds,
to grow.


Peer Review

My favorite line is, "The sky is not a monster under the bed,/ only the gentle silk of morning" (4-5). This line is my favorite because the writer relates to the sky to a "monster under the bed", which I just think is such a creative analogy. Furthermore, he/she is saying that we should appreciate the sky for its placidity and its place in nature, and I like the pleasant tone that this establishes early on in the piece.


The writer evokes a tone and feeling by providing lots of natural imagery spanning from the first stanza all the way to the last line fifth stanza.


Reviewer Comments

Overall, I think the piece truly is strong in that it addresses the prompt very well, its nature imagery is superb and the writer's ability to connect nature to humanity shows great writing prowess. In a second draft, I would perhaps only recommend trying to establish a more consistent line and stanza structure as to help it flow just a little bit smoother. Overall though, the piece is strong, and the writer seems to be a natural with poetry. I hope to see more pieces from this writer on Write the World!