rosie_

Australia

rosie <3

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est. 4th Aug 2021

Message to Readers

Thank you Writing4Life and Lara J for the wonderful reviews, and everyone else for such kind encouragement :) Any comments/feedback is welcomed!

Hibiscus

September 7, 2021

FREE WRITING

33
The mountain tops crown the horizon, which boasts shades of apricot blended with the hue of a morning blush. Silhouettes dance in the hollows and valleys and down low-lying streams. The air is misty and has a certain warmth that cocoons my body, comforting my tense limbs. Huts nest in sproutings of green, the tips of the straw roofs glow golden in the hazy light. A village.

In China is the Jiaju village, hidden by a blanket of hills. The rocky mountain path guides my footsteps through plantations of wheat and grazing oxes, towards the heart of the village. I uncurl each of my fingers to reveal a black and white photograph. It’s crumpled by my hand and has creases tracing across the blissful face of my young mother. Just a few months ago, I received word of her death. At that moment, an overwhelming sorrow slapped me across the face, and despite barely knowing her, I knew I had to venture to her village and try to unveil the woman she really was.  

The pastures are decorated by spottings of vibrant hibiscuses, like the ones my mother used to give me. Every dusk, when stars would begin to kiss the dark of the sky, she would bring me home a hibiscus and interlace it in the charcoal strands of my hair. The ombre red of the petals reminds me of the days I used to spend in the village, before being taken by my father to Australia. Now, more than ever, I long to be in her warm embrace.

Anxiety gnaws upon the insides of my stomach, excitement pounds heavily in my chest. Before I can continue ambling onwards, I am halted in my path by a young girl.

Her unkempt hair screams mischief, her laughing eyes search the stranger in me. The girl's face is like a canvas, exhibiting spatters of ashes and smears of dirt. I crouch to her level.
“Hello,” I whisper, my ignorance leading me to forget that she couldn’t speak English. 
She runs away quickly, a hill concealing her, devouring her shadow. I trail closely behind in a guarded search. 

Her figure then emerges, her head bowed low in a curious fear. I reach to the earth beneath me and pick the most vibrant hibiscus. I indicate for her to turn around, and she does. I brush my fingertips carefully through the tangles of her hair, entwining the lush blossom in it. The simple gesture ignites a wide smile across her face. She rushes back eagerly to the center of the village. 

My gaze follows her every step until she is swallowed up by the fog. The long years I spent without my mother flow into the breeze and out of my mind as I realize, the simple gestures that my mother instilled in me became symbols of binding between us. By now, the sun has risen, sending brilliant rays to hug the earth, providing comfort and an undeniable sense of hope. Like the young girl, I eagerly race to the village, led by a field of hibiscuses. 

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10 Comments
  • cookies_and_stardust

    THIS IS SO BEAUTIFUL CONGRATS ON THE WIN!


    2 months ago
  • SamRose

    I love this! Also, the INHERITANCE GAMES I love those books! Team Grayson all the way! My other friends on here BriRiley and MillieBunn are huge fans too, we've formed a sort of book club. :p


    2 months ago
  • blues-clues

    This is written so well!! Also congrats on the writer's pick!


    2 months ago
  • KanjiKat

    Beautifully written. Congrats on writers pick rosie_.


    2 months ago
  • Chai Tea

    This piece is absolutely spectacular, and your use of symbolism is highly effective. With nominations from both Writing4Life and I, it's clear you deserve Writer's Pick. Congratulations!


    2 months ago
  • its_just_Rose

    This is an incredible story with beautiful imagery. Congrats on Writer's Pick! I really enjoyed this, so I'm going to follow you.


    2 months ago
  • Writing4Life

    NO WAY. You won't believe this, but I actually nominated this for Writer's Pick as well!!! You totally deserve two nominations with this piece! Congrats!!


    2 months ago
  • A. Penderwick

    Wow, your imagery is stunning, and this is a beautiful story.


    2 months ago
  • Writing4Life

    Ahhh I love this version even more! I love the different turn the plot has taken with the mother as well!
    Re: Thank you!


    3 months ago
  • Hitasha

    This is a really well - written, touching and emotional piece. I really liked your piece a lot; the way you expressed your thoughts and your past along with the present is definitely praise - worthy. Keep it up !!


    3 months ago