Peer Review by vastexpansion (United States)

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you've always thought the sea was magnetic

By: emmagrace


you’ve always thought the sea was magnetic,
the secret place where the sky kisses the sea
has always been just beyond your reach

kinda like stars, the contemporaries of your age
tell you to stretch your fingers and reach for
burning fire and silver moons

but gravity only gives your feet two seconds to fly
before plopping you down on the wet sand where
castles are in your midst

it’s hard to keep trying to succeed when things
pull you down, but remember, without gravity,
you’d never return to what once was

and you know you can't give up
gravity can be beaten in artificial birds
respect the limits, but never stop singing 

if the waves don’t stop trying to bubble over 
the shoreline then you shouldn’t stop reaching
for your dreams; don't bring down the kite

and even when the sun has drained from the world,
the moon lights your way and paints sterling on the waters;
stars don’t always appear in the sky

in this place, you can taste the air
​in this place, the clouds are origamis
in this place, the waves are infused with hope
in this place, the world seems wonderfully whole
in this place, the kaleidoscope of sunrise will cover you in song

you’ve always thought the sea was magnetic, 
and that’s why you’re there again
 


Peer Review

Can I just say HOLY! I'm very impressed by this poem, the imagery that you intertwined into your writing, the full circle ending, the fluidity of your words every single line. I love it all. I am left feeling a sense of warmth after this poem, and as I was reading it I recalled every time I thought I would end, every time I felt like stopping. But I also thought of every time I came treading back, and begun once more.


My favorite line (or rather part) of your poem is
"and even when the sun has drained from the world,
the moon lights your way and paints sterling on the waters;
stars don’t always appear in the sky " This line resonates with me so much.


I think you have done great so far.


Beautiful! Good luck, I think this is a great poem!


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