and as i hold my heart in my hands, the pieces start
to unravel. bit by bit dissecting into strands of
longing? desperation? hope? blood seeps through my
fingers as i feel my heartbeat weaken. and i try to
hold the pieces together. i try to keep my blood, my
life, my hope in. did i open Pandora's Box? did i just
give up my last chance at hope? or maybe i gave it
yesterday. i was better yesterday after all. i was.
my heart could beat, my lungs could breathe, my
brain could think. now i don't know if i can do any
of those things. as i loose blood, i loose hope, i loose
time. and still i'm stuck in yesterday. why? it never
really mattered anyway. i can't change anything and
now i'm stuck living as a stopwatch. i can only watch
as my heart weakens and pumps ever slower and my
eyelids grow so much heavier. but the only thing i
truly miss is the hope. but hope that is seen is no
hope at all. and all i can say is one small phrase.
never lose hope
So I think this is the first piece I've written that actually needs a trigger warning, but i was feeling a little graphic today. I hope it doesn't get taken down lol.
Also I have no idea what brought on that creepy word vomit... I'm actually doing quite well in case ya'll were wondering. :)