McK13

United States

Hi :) 14 she/her

I love...

Poetry, Memoirs, Stories (and all literature!)
Labradoodles, Family & Friends
Basketball & Volleyball
Listening to music, watching TV, & sleeping

Joined WTW: 12/30/2020

Thank you so much for 60+ followers!

Message to Readers

Hi! Thank you so much for taking the time to check out my piece! I wanted to write a song about being young and in love so I came up with this. Also, I was working on trying to make it seem like a story so hopefully, it does! Feel free to leave any feedback you might have. All criticism is super helpful and very much appreciated! Have a fantastic day/night :)

City Love

March 25, 2021

FREE WRITING

10

(Verse 1) 

In the park that evening
I was waiting for you to stop by 
Played a quick pickup game
Kobe’s on my feet
Purple and gold 23 on my jersey
Ball in my hand
Shoot, follow-through
Swish goes the hoop

(Verse 2) 

Then you ran over
In your red Jordan's
The Bulls have always been your team
And we were in LA, Laker Nation
Home of the mamba, home of the king
Should’ve called you a traitor
But then you asked to go one on one
Of course, my answer was yes
 
(Chorus) 

And like usual, I won
But you didn’t lose that night
Cause in the moonlight
I looked into your eyes
Suddenly, I was your prize
Laying on the concrete
In flannel and jeans
Just buildings surrounding us 
The city was my first love
But then you came and won

(Verse 3) 

At the bus stop
Eleven o'clock
I caught you on a bench
Said, ain't it after curfew
You shrugged
Asked what I was doing
Course, I had no excuse
So I squeezed right next to you

(Verse 4) 
 
You turned, looked at me
Ever heard of Rakim?
Then you hit play and he dropped the beat
“I think and then I sink
Into the paper, like I was ink”
What even is this? I asked
Come on, he’s a lyrical genius, you said
So I kept listening and I couldn’t argue

(Chorus) 

I guess this time, you won
But I didn’t lose that night
Cause in the moonlight
You looked into my eyes
Suddenly, you were all mine
Two kids on these streets
No need to party or drink
Just buildings surrounding us 
The city was my first love
But then you came and won

(Bridge) 

I want to build a world with you
Where we could run away together
Be young and free, have lots of fun
We could follow our wildest dreams
But know, I'm only down for the journey
If you're down with me
Cause I don't need the city's love
When you're my city, love
Yeah, I don't need the city's love
When you're my city, love

(Outro) 

And I can promise you
That no matter how much I lose
Each night when I close my eyes
I'll know that even if the score's 100 to 0
I will always have won
Cause you're my city, love

Print

See History
  • March 25, 2021 - 7:26pm (Now Viewing)

Login or Signup to provide a comment.

15 Comments
  • FantasyOtter12

    Re: Np, im glad you liked it :) It was fun to rhyme with heh


    6 months ago
  • Ree Sethu

    Wow! Such lovely lyrics! The title is just perfect!


    6 months ago
  • halle_cj

    re: ty <3


    6 months ago
  • Tachi

    Re: thank you


    6 months ago
  • Ellington Stone

    I love the title of this and all the little real-life refrences. It made it so real, totally got a city vibe.
    Re: Omg, thank you so much!! I appreciate it. And that's the best combo :)


    6 months ago
  • Just_A_Memory

    The title immediately drew me in! I love the concept too, and you have so many details in the lyrics it's amazing! And that last line. *Chef's kiss* What a way to end!


    6 months ago
  • Nyla

    Awwww omg I loved this- it was so sweet!!! I'm pretty bad in that I don't follow basketball outside of the raptors so if there was any hidden meaning in the basketball players and teams- ahhh, sorry I won't be able to pick up on that! But this moved so nicely and the storyline was awwww! It was such a cute romance song! "But you didn’t lose that night" just awww melted my heart!! and the ending just awww!! I know I'm saying aww a lot but it's true! and I love how you switched the chorus so slightly that it made sense at the certain part you put it AND was pretty similar! Awesome!!


    6 months ago
  • Nyla

    RE: Awww, thank you!! And haha loll, not really dreams (I don’t really remember mine much either) more daydreams and like the beginning of sleep when if you’re not too tired you try to make up a dream to fall asleep XD and awww thank you!!! And hahah, thanks! I did pretty good but omg loll one time the thing was something like life and I decided to do a nature documentary and be the narrator but they always talk about death so I said “and now the baby rhinoceros watch as their mother is killed by the ferocious tiger” or something like that and I was so proud of myself and then my teacher was like “that was the opposite of life” LOL
    And yesss!! And honestly sometimes they sound like rap too!! Plus professional spoken word artists are sooo cool!
    And hahah- yes! There’s the competitiveness you talked about!
    And yes omg it’s absolutely breathtaking!! Plus, they have ZERO SNAKES!! Which I mean, I don’t mind them that much (one time when I was younger, I held a corn snake around my neck) but it’s nice to know you can go in the super wilderness and something won’t slither it’s way to you and potentially be poisonous!


    6 months ago
  • nolongeractive

    Re: Thank you so much, you are an incredible friend! You have so much kindness in you and I appreciate your support more than you'll ever know! Also, I am so sorry about the depression in your family, it is horrible and I admire your desire to keep such matters private! You are amazing! Love ya!


    6 months ago
  • nolongeractive

    Re: OMG I cannot thank you enough for taking the time to read and leave these outstandingly kind comments on my pieces; I am at a loss for words. Also, I think that you interpreted the meaning very, as the piece is not about taking one's life but about losing oneself to their own thoughts if that makes sense. You are so amazing and such a kind friend, and I am so grateful for you. And, if I never need anything, I will reach out. In my life, though, I have never thought about self-harm because I am fairly happy, this piece was very much based on the views of other people. My dad is the president of Unicef and works to fight for the voice of children and teens, and he has been able to discuss the thoughts that go through many teens' heads around my age. Furthermore, I am going to write a piece about suicide prevention because I believe all lives matter and everyone is worth it. Thanks again, love you so much!


    6 months ago
  • Anne Blackwood

    Re: Thank you! That's exactly what I was going for.


    6 months ago
  • nolongeractive

    Re: OMG THANK YOU SO MUCH, you are so kind and talented!!


    6 months ago
  • nolongeractive

    This song is outstanding, and the title drew me in immediately. I love every piece and line because each one has so much emotion; you have so much talent. This song is so dreamy and very relatable too! I loved when you said 'swish goes the hoop' and I love the theme of basketball. My 14-year-old sister plays basketball and I don't really know much about it, LOL, but it is still so fun! I love how fun and energetic and honest your music is; it is so different than mine and I love it. I cannot wait to read your upcoming music!


    6 months ago
  • nolongeractive

    Re: Omg thanks so much, I don't even know how to express my gratitude for how you take the time to read and comment on my pieces, I love you so much!


    6 months ago
  • Livsnjutare

    re: Thank you so much!! That means a lot :)


    6 months ago