Yellow Sweater

United States

Zinnia | she/her | bi | agnostic | 18 | WA

2021-2022 Seattle Youth Poet Laureate

Elitist Atlantic Subscriber (jk, but I do think the Atlantic does some awsome journalism)

I don't necessarily agree with my own assertions

Message from Writer

I like spaceships, temples, and tea.

Some of my favorite poets and poet-adjacent-people: Federico Garcia Lorca, Ocean Vuong, Annie Dillard, Italo Calvino, Arundhati Roy, Michael Ondaatje, Becky Chambers, Pablo Neruda... The list goes on.

I am on here way too much.

My book is out next June! It feels wonderful to be able to say that with such certainty!

There are so many excellent writers on this site, but if you are new and looking for a place to start, check out: Paisley Blue, aosora, wishtree, aismic, Starlitskies, R.j.Elsewhere, amaryllis, .. ugh there are so many more....

Prayer Book

March 24, 2021

FREE WRITING

12
I wanted to experience Catholicism, the ritual of eating God on a dreary Sunday morning. So last winter, I hauled myself up the hill to St Mary’s Star of the Sea, only to find that mass was conducted in Spanish and that God’s dismembered body was reserved for initiates. 

Is it too late for me to understand the rhythm of the ritual? Too late to flesh out my flesh? Too late to learn Spanish… Latin… Greek, Hebrew, Aramaic?  Elohim, your name is plural. I am who I am. You are who you are. We are who we are. Are we separate? Or are we whole. 

I want to kneel before beeswax candles, to feel God’s grace behind the stochastic incandescence of our light. I want to passionately believe what my ancestors knew. Dear, Mr, Sir, Your Majesty, Your Eminence, The Pope, give me a prayer book. I’ll repeat the words until they become palpable, palatable, poetry.

 

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  • March 24, 2021 - 1:58pm (Now Viewing)

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7 Comments
  • V-Rose

    This is a beautiful piece. And actually, the reason only certain people can receive the Eucharist is because of the process of sacraments within the church. You have to be baptized first, and cleansed of original sin. Then there's reconciliation. And then you can receive the Eucharist. It's kind of like not being able to drive until you learn other things first.
    And also, going to a Spanish mass is beautiful, in my opinion. Granted, I've gone to a bilingual mass since forever, but it's still beautiful.
    And finally, I would like to repeat that this piece is stunning. I like the way you phrased everything and I hope one day, you'll experience the Eucharist.


    6 months ago
  • Deleted User

    Beautiful. I love the line "Is it too late for me to understand the rhythm of the ritual?" Especially "rhythm of the ritual"--such satisfying and gorgeous alliteration.
    I'm Catholic, but I an understand wanting partake in what we do every Sunday, I used to feel that way, actually, cause I went to a Catholic school for two years and only converted to Catholicism during the third. So yeah. I get it :)
    (I also understand that that's not the only message in this piece--like Minvra said, my understanding is that this is about exclusion.)


    6 months ago
  • Minvra

    I think I get the message. Missing out, exclusion. And the question "but weren't we all people? Human?" Sorry if it's a bit vague, I'm pretty tired


    6 months ago
  • happygiggles

    This is stunning, the emotions are raw and your words flow so well! :)


    6 months ago
  • Nyla

    Wow, I love this!! My favourite is when you say you want to passionately believe what your ancestors know because it's such a human thing to want. RE: aww, of course! I'm glad :) And ooh yes, that makes so much sense because your writing really does remind me of Martel's- especially this piece. And aww, thank you so much!! Haha good :) Are there any other books that have had an influence on your writing or you really enjoyed? (don't mind me just getting my book recommendations from you haha)


    6 months ago
  • BlueWolf (Semi Hiatus)

    This is a beautiful piece of writing. The last paragraph was spellbinding. This has an amazing message, and story. I love the way you have written this!


    6 months ago
  • Anne Blackwood

    Re: Thank you. Honest conversations are terrifying and messy and sometimes painful, but it's definitely better to have them than to keep it all bottled up. But if one of the people isn't emotionally mature enough to handle it, it can get ugly.


    6 months ago