Parisienne

United Kingdom

She/her
18
Scorpio
Daydreamer, writer, artist and traveller
Coffee addict
Dreaming of Paris

Message to Readers

When it all is just too much.
I hope you are all having a beautiful day :D

Shreds

March 7, 2021

FREE WRITING

13
I watched them tear up my life
teeth bared in the attack 
malicious smiles
snidely smirking
ripping up my papery existence
into fragile fragments
running erasers over my hope
each savaged, crumpled ruin
more broken than the last
so I knelt upon the floor
surrounded by the shreds
my hands clasped
almost in prayer
head bowed in subservience
as I tried to glue
the pieces back together
again.

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  • March 7, 2021 - 6:07am (Now Viewing)

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25 Comments
  • Nyla

    Wowww- I loved this so much!! It was so powerful and the ending was so sad but also great that the person didn't give up and was still fighting! I love the "papery existence" because it just helps me envision it so well! RE: Thank youuu! But to be honest I’m not really sure where my dark poetry comes from because half the time I’m smiling! Either I’m a physcopath or I guess I draw from the past (wow that makes me sound like a vampire XD) And awww, thank you!!


    7 months ago
  • nolongeractive

    Re: Thank you so much!!! I cannot wait to release our song! We should def work on it this weekend?


    7 months ago
  • Lizzie R

    Re: Of course :)))
    You're welcome!!! I read a lot of books like 2-3 a week at least so I will definitely have more recommendations in the future!! I haven't read either of those yet but I've heard good things about them. Plus Paper Towns is by John Green so it's obviously going to be great. I can't believe he has such a way with words when he writes and really blows minds when he writes but then there are his Crash Course videos ahahaha. I'm not sure if you have a Goodreads account but I use it all the time to help me organize books I want to read and how many books I've read this year and stuff like that. I highly recommend it!! Thank you for the book recs :)))
    Have an amazing day even though it's over half over for you already :)


    7 months ago
  • barelybear

    Re: ahh finished test number 2 :p. But we’re negative so all is well :D we somehow managed to get out of doing the throat one :)
    Ugh parent scientists can be so annoying lmao. Especially since I’ve always been passionately against science. My dad is super physicsy but I guess that kinda just helps with homework’s and stuff :)
    Testament to my social skills that right now I’m sat woth my friends typing this ahhsgha. It’s ok they’re all playing games on their phones or doing work ahah.


    7 months ago
  • Writing4Life

    re: Awww tysm! Aaaa yes! Ooo I'm not sure! I've always wanted to see the Eiffel tower :) Can you speak French?


    7 months ago
  • CowsinTrees

    Re: sorry I’m so late but thank you for your comment! I also love your writing


    7 months ago
  • ArtCat

    This is beautiful, the way you use your words!
    RE: Thank you for your kind comment!


    7 months ago
  • Deleted User

    O my goodness wow you have left me speechless-this is AMAZING! So powerful love this!
    re: Aw girl thank you :)


    7 months ago
  • Zirong

    "running erasers over my hope/each savaged, crumpled ruin/more broken than the last"

    ojfkdghurthioerjal I can feel SO MUCH from this poem... I really adore ALL of your poems OMG! I read your message to readers -- I wish you are doing well and having a beautiful day too! :D

    re: SO SORRY for this late reply! I planned to reply to you right after I finished the review, but some random things happened, and it was already midnight when I went back to my laptop *sigh*
    YESSS I can't agree more that public transport is one of the best places to get ideas. Somehow my mind is the most peaceful in the noisiest place :D Also, I get the chance to observe a lot of people and can always be inspired :)
    Awww thank you so much for your encouragement! Honestly I feel academic lit is so different from what I thought it would be. I borrowed a book from a friend who used to take lit in school(now he has dropped it and taken a higher level physics instead so can give his books to me haha), and after scanning through the book I found a "proper" poetry analysis to be enigmatic, because my interpretations of the poems in the book were just somehow completely different from the points listed in the answer exemplars *facepalm*. Also, I mostly read contemporary literature, so for me it's a bit hard to understand those relatively older literature works, which are included in academic lit syllabus. But perhaps these all just require practice. Anyway, I really admire people who take lit in school(like you! :D) coz y'all can understand and analyse works from different ages(even the works of Shakespeare -- I scanned through several plays by him and then gave up analysing XD). At the same time I also envy y'all coz spending a lot of time every day with lit must be really fulfilling to those who are passionate about it! :D
    Oh no no worries -- your comment is not sad or boring at all! I really adore its honesty, and your care and support warmed my heart :) Yea I also feel that teens nowadays are so vulnerable but at the same time incredibly strong -- the older generations in my society alway say that teens today are too fragile to bear any suffering they went through in their years, but only we ourselves know how tremendous the mental pressure can be in the current world!
    Thank you so much for your kind words! I'm really nervous about the March Common Test because it'll be the first time we take full papers instead of half papers. I hope you can have fun in school once you return!
    Honestly I'm not sure whether teens having jobs is a big deal here haha. I know a few people in my cohort who's doing a part-time, but it seems that most of us don't have any. I'm sorry to hear that there is a stereotype towards not taking a job in the UK -- I really think it's just a personal choice, and I believe you will find a job that suits you soon!
    OOOOH I LOVE THE BODY SHOP TOO! It's actually quite popular here :D yeaaa it's really gorgeous -- my shampoo is always from there, and sometimes I'll purchase gifts for my family and friends from there coz the products are so well-packed! I don't have a favourite scent yet, but I like their ginger shampoo XD
    Let me apologise in advance that I may not be able to reply to your comments quickly recently because of the upcoming March common test *sigh* But I'll try my best! Do take care of yourself and have a lovely term ahead!!! <333

    *hug* from Zirong :)


    7 months ago
  • Lizzie R

    Okay, so I have a few book recommendations for you.

    Serpent and Dove by Shelby Mahurin (I just finished this a few hours ago and it's good)
    Every Last Word by Tamara Ireland Stone
    Until The End by Christopher Pike
    And Then There Were None by Agatha Christie
    The Selection Series by Kiera Cass
    Calling Invisible Women by Jeanne Ray
    We Were Liars by E. Lockhart
    Tell Me Three Things by Julie Buxbaum

    Some of these you've probably already read but those are just some book recs. If you want any more I will gladly recommend some :)


    7 months ago
  • Lizzie R

    Re: Thank you so much, Becca. It means the world to have a friend like you that is also a complete stranger. You're amazing and I couldn't ask for anyone better to be like a big sister online :)
    *kisses*
    ~Lizzie


    7 months ago
  • Writing4Life

    Oh my goodness I LOVE your pfp! I adore France too :D I wishhhhhh I could go there!


    7 months ago
  • barelybear

    Re: ahaha I seriously want to turn GBBO into a mini film. Comedy has always been my first love ahah. Oh dw banksy my parents would probably be like “Yuck this vagabond Banksy has vandalised my house” buttttt they’re scientists, so just throw in a couple of test tubes things lmao and they’ll be chill.

    Ahh my week’s going pretty good. Went back into school today, which was kinda awkward. I looked like a year 7 with my bag crammed with books and my social skills disintegrated :p
    In lockdown our lessons were 45 mins, but now they’re back to an hour and boy am I EXHAUSTED. Just had time to punch out a quick review after and English essay agh. But, it was fun to see my friends again, and to get the drama scripted piece up and running finally :D
    How’s your week going? Hope you’ve had a good return to school :)


    7 months ago
  • Emi

    This is really well-written. I love the imagery in it and the symbolism that I feel goes throughout it.


    7 months ago
  • Lizzie R

    Re: Thank you so much!!


    7 months ago
  • nolongeractive

    Re: Wow, thank you so much! I cannot wait until we release our collaboration.


    7 months ago
  • Stone of Jade

    aww thank you so so much for your comments!! They were so sweet.
    re: oh my word i wanna see the galleries so so bad! And not just art tho--i want to see parisian countryside and homes and just have that travel vibe. i cant remember where i stayed in germany but i did get to see the cathedral in cologne/koln (and climbed to the top of a spier) i also walked along the rhine river. ahh so gorgeous. my fav part was i saw this sweet old couple on a bench asleep on each others shoulders <333 i hope to go back one day. altho i loved visiting morocco more (same trip) i got to see gorgeous mosques and squares in casablanca, merekesh, and agadir. i will never forget riding a camel overlooking agadir. i hope to go back and see the sahara and more places in africa. oh man i want to travel so so bad! and now im ranting lol.
    have you gotten to travel places? Any favorites/memories? any bucket list destinations?
    re/re: the piece was about two places--the first, where i grew up. a small town called Rockport in Massachusetts. the second was Boston (more specifically the boston public gardens and fanuel hall--mac and cheese there is bomb)


    7 months ago
  • Ava Marie

    Re: Thank you so much!!!
    This is sooo good, so beautiful, so full of emotion, I love it!


    7 months ago
  • _Delphiruns2theocean_

    Re: Thank you so much and I'm glad you are more known about this now :) I'm trying to do other countries too for people who don't live in the US for more familiar names they've heard of :)


    7 months ago
  • Dragonfly

    This is beautiful and full of emotion! I love the metaphors you use and the dense feelings you convey so very well!
    Re: Yes, I will want to know :) I haven't been to a desert either, it was just something I remembered from geography class... I think the temperature doesn't really matter though; the inhabitants should create a warm atmosphere with their peaceful coexistence :).
    I can't decide really.. The castle was beautiful indeed, but I think I simply like the cityscape. I loved this one very old library in a monastery a bit outside the city. And I liked the Old New Synagogue and the Spanish Synagogue very much, since they were both (in very different ways) beautiful.
    Yes, I agree! Though there are so many other cities I would like to visit too! Right now isn't really the time for traveling anyway though.
    Yes, thank you! I'm preparing for Maths and Physics exams and I should study for Philosophy and a little for English too..., but I think I'll manage it.
    Well, I suppose even the lockdown has some advantages. I'm homeschooled though and I feel as though I spend more time with school stuff than I did before. Are you still going to school? I don’t know what it’s like in the UK, but in Germany one can finish school before 18 (in theory).
    Yes, I love creating things! I don't know why; I suppose it makes me feel productive :D. I love embroidery and origami and I've tried sewing, but am not very good at it. I enjoy knitting, but keep forgetting how it works, so I keep relearning it haha. I used to felt too, but I keep trying out new things, if I have the time. I love drawing and painting most, I think. And writing, of course :) (it always depends on the mood however).
    All the best
    Malin <3


    7 months ago
  • barelybear

    no no no definitely not the case! I think some metaphors can come off cringey, but you handled it so well! You've put in a load of original, unique lines which elevate the piece so so much!

    Aaaahhhh Banksy!!! My big sis!! I mean *furtive glances, whispered tones* *unspecific eeeeeeee!*
    look at you tagging bridges. please come tag my house lel


    7 months ago
  • Lizzie R

    Re: Of course!!! I love your writing so much :))
    I'll respond as soon as I can :)
    Thank you, Becca!
    Awww omg thank you so much, you're amazing :)))
    Take care of yourself :)
    ~Lizzie xx


    7 months ago
  • Stone of Jade

    there is so much emotion in this....each metaphor strung together so carefully and so beautifully. gorgeous


    7 months ago
  • barelybear

    Re: awh but dw we all have weak ponts and mine is creating artwork that doesn’t look demented :D
    Wow your spray paint style seems super cool! You could be like banksy omgsbsbs. What if you are banksy sjjsjs. If there’s any medium I would want to be good at, it would be spray paint or something with colour ahah.

    Ahh how do you keep pouring out these metaphors?? I love your writing! “Ripping up my papery existence/ into fragile fragments” wow wow wow wow aghhh it’s so beautiful! You are so great at vivid emotion!


    7 months ago
  • Lizzie R

    You've done it again! You always have so much raw emotion and I love this so so much! Good job, Becca :))

    Re: Thank you so much!! It truly means the world to me :)
    Of course, I'm sure it'll go just fine :) Omg I haven't checked my actual email in a while I'll do it in a little bit, so sorry to keep you waiting!!
    We're doing okay fevers are breaking so that's good :))
    Take care, Becca!
    ~Lizzie xx


    7 months ago