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Message to Readers

sleeping time is a precious gift. please cherish it.

too sleep-deprived to be a good girl

March 10, 2021



don't ask me why
i no longer raise my hand in class
i am just too sleep-deprived to
catch your words —
they fly pass my ears
my brain is a blank canvas
but strangely enough —
last night
colours overflowed
words raced through my head
sewing up things that 
i dare only dream about
in dreams

don't try to remind me
when was the last time 
you saw my smile
i am just too sleep-deprived to 
move those 17 muscles —
when inspirations drain
i trade off the nights
for straight As
for nailing TOEFL and SAT
for competitions
i'm not at all interested in
yet these are far from enough 
to get me into the universities
you circled on your list

i'm just a little bit
too sleep-deprived to be
a good girl 

a random idea knocked me on the head when i was about to fall asleep on the bus. 
shout out to Bus No.12 which has been a sweet home to my inspirations :D


See History
  • March 10, 2021 - 3:08am (Now Viewing)

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  • In Which Yaya Writes

    Hehe, this is actually kinda funny. I really love the first part, but “i am just too sleep-deprived to
    move those 17 muscles,” is so smart! Great job!
    (And “shout out to Bus No.12 which has been a sweet home to my inspirations :D” Bahaha!)
    Late Reply: Wow, 70 translations?? I don’t think I’d be able to write that XD. Go you!
    Yeah, I agree. I like acting out writing, especially dialogue. That way I can see if it flows nicely or needs to be redone. I’m glad I’m not the only one XD.
    Ok, I will try that for my song! I’m trying out all different methods that way I can actually write the thing XD. But thank you!
    No problem!
    Have a great day!

    6 months ago
  • Nyla

    Wow! I love this, it flows so nicely! "move those 17 muscles" was definitely one of my favorite parts because it was just so specific! And also really relatable- nighttime is when my brain's most active! I love the italic parts as well! Amazing! RE: Omg thank you so much! All your really kind comments mean a lot to me because you're so super talented as well! :))
    And haha, no worries about not picking up on it- I wrote it in grade 7 (I'm now in grade 10) so there's definitely a lot I could flesh out on more, I had it here, "Trying to forget but memory insists/ The girl was snobby/ Downright rude/ Pointing her nose in the air/ Extreme attitude" basically just saying that the girl was really mean. And omg you're so nice! I'm so glad you enjoy my writing! Also wait- that's such a good idea! If I wrote this now I probably would have thought about that but to be honest, in grade 7 I just wanted something to rhyme but wow, feel free to keep thinking it's deeper than it is XD and no worries- overthinking makes literature so much more enjoyable!! Thank you again :))

    6 months ago
  • sci-Fi

    Yes. everything about this is a super relatable yes.

    6 months ago
  • McK13

    Omg, I can relate to this so much!! I literally am always super alive at night and my mind has so many thoughts and ideas but then in the morning, I'm just too sleep-deprived to be a good girl. Outstanding job :)

    6 months ago
  • McK13

    re: thank you so so much!!! I really appreciate it and I'm so happy that you liked the language I used and thought the piece flowed well :)

    6 months ago
  • Nikki

    re: haha. i hope they're more positive special feelings. but im glad u liked it. :) ur such a darling for liking the title. and from one insane person to another... heyyy!
    also, that is so smart to call it a thriller! yes indeed it is one!
    hmmm sleep? i dont think i remember her XD bruh seriously, i was awake till 2:30 in the morning yesterday. and i woke up at like 11 *soooo embarrassed*
    anyways, i hope ur getting slightly better sleep there <3

    7 months ago
  • Parisienne

    heyyy Zirong - so sorry for my late reply. I'm back a college (whoop!) but it does mean there's less time to reply to your lovely comments.
    re: aww thank you. I hope you are having a beautiful day too Zirong. PLEASE don't worry about late replies! I am far more guilty of them than you are - and it's just lovely to hear from you, whenever you can chat :D
    Yessss, public transport is so bustling and face-paced and you can legitimately brew stories whilst staring out the window. I imagine your public transport is a lot more crowded than mine though (as Singapore is such a bustling city), must mean even more ideas!!!
    Geezz don't worry about misinterpreting poems - I do it all the time haha! My English teacher was so rude to me last year because I gave a *wrong* misinterpretation when I contributed to a class discussion regarding a poem we'd studied, she went "no shut up, you're wrong" :O. Luckily my classmates stuck up for me but she really was not a nice person. Anyway, my point is that you CANNOT misinterpret a poem or any work of lit Zirong, because there are no wrong interpretation. That (in my humble opinion) is what observing any kind of art is all about :D. I am actually studying Hamlet (Will Shakespeare) at the moment - most of the time I have no idea what is going on haha :D. I think analysing words from different ages is always hard-I'm sure you've had to do it in your mother language. Takes me a few reads of a sentence to get the hang of it but then I'm off and running!!
    Yes, it is lovely getting to read books and discuss the ideas suggested between their pages but to be honest sometimes I wish we could just enjoy the stories for what they are. It can get exhausting, reading all these books yet only for analysis and unpicking. However, it is lovely to discuss lit (and my class is so fun).
    Very true, we do have a lot of mental strength in our generation!
    Good luck with your March common test - it'll be fine I am sure. Wow - what a transition from half to a full paper, I can see that you will be nervous. However, I am sure you will definitely take it in your stride. School was fun last week so thank you - it was great to see my friends again :D
    That's nice if it's a less of a big deal in your country - I wish it was here too. Thank you for your kind words, I hope I find a nice job before long (and you too if you want one) :).
    Noooo way!!! We are literally sisters Zirong haha! I adore the body shop, I always by my shampoo from there too (only green tea's my fave - ginger sounds gorgeous too though). Yes, their gifts are wonderful, I love the warm vanilla range at Christmas (I wish they kept it going the whole year long).
    No worries on the replying front - just have a great term and take care of yourself <3 <3. Good luck in your exams - you will be amazing!!! Lots of love
    Becca *big hug* xoxo

    7 months ago
  • nolongeractive

    This is wonderful and so powerful, you are just outstanding!

    7 months ago
  • Nikki

    I CAN RELATE TO THIS A 10000000%. it is freakly super duper relatable to my life right now! ha beautifully put. and yes, i AM too sleep deprived to be a good girl
    re: aww thank you so much! i seriously found found words and threw them on the page :)

    7 months ago
  • Nikki

    oh lord

    7 months ago
  • JonesyL123

    Amazing writing, I seriously loved the line "my brain is a blank canvas," that was beautiful!

    7 months ago
  • WrenBirdWrites

    Wow, this is beautiful. And super relatable. :)

    7 months ago
  • Starlitskies

    Beautiful. There's such poignance to your words. And I absolutely love the ending/title. Your specificity really amplifies the poem. I do hope you're okay though. I know how this feels. Don't hesitate to reach out if you want to talk. <3

    7 months ago
  • SamRose

    Re: Aw thx! I hope you are having a wonderful day too! :)

    7 months ago
  • nolongeractive

    Re: Thank you so so much!

    7 months ago
  • Parisienne

    Re: awwwh thank you so much I am glad you enjoyed reading about my fantasyland! Thank you, you’re so kind Zirong and YES I would love to hear your views through a peer review if you want to do one!
    Sorry, my mistake with the No 12. Bus thing – I meant we owe the bus a lot because your incredible writing came into fruition on it! I think a lot on my bus – but I actually catch the 18 to college :D. Still, I think public transport is one of the best places to get ideas – so many people and places blurring past and you have the space to let your thoughts rampage around until they make sense :D.
    ‘I always regret I didn't choose the arts stream. But for me science stream requires less effort’. I don’t think you need to regret this choice at all zirong, your spare time can be used to pursue the arts just like you’re doing rn. Besides, with writing as good as yours you hardly need to be taught techniques – you can do it on your own! ‘I can't imagine taking academic English literature’ – geez Zirong of course not! You speak it sooo well but I can’t even imagine how difficult it would be to see the underlying themes of a second language in literature. I am in total awe of how intelligent you are and how incredible your English is!
    Thank you for being so honest about your own experience of depression (I am sorry because I think the day I replied to you I was painfully down – I hope my comment wasn’t too sad and boring :D) I know what you mean about the ‘constant state of anxiety’, there is so much pressure on teens these days. It’s a wonder we all just keep striving. Painting is a big stress reliever for me too, as well as walking :D. Thank you for being so sweet and I hope you are okay <3
    Eugh, IK what you mean about school being insane – our A levels are all messed up this year because of coronavirus so we’re still not sure which format they will take. Good luck with your March common test- I am here for you if you need support! I know you will shine though :D. Haha yes we writers just party with pens (what I wouldn’t give for a party rn though!)
    Yesss anime is amazing (especially Japanese), I hope you get to watch more soon :).
    Oooh that makes me feel better that you’ve never had a job before – is it a big deal in Singapore too? Over here it really is, people see you as lazy and spoilt if you don’t get a job – but I really am not. I just can’t find one! Oooh yess those are my dream holiday jobs too!! Coffee shop or bookstore are the ones I’m always going in with CV’s like PLEASE TAKE ME!! I would also love to work for a beauty store – Body shop is my favourite (don’t know if you have it in Singapore but it’s basically gorgeous, ethical products made by communities all over the world.) My favourite scent is vanilla :D
    Thank you, I am so excited to be seeing my friends again – take care of yourself and good luck with your exams. Can’t wait to read more of your incredible work too!!
    Lots of love
    Becca <3 *hug*

    7 months ago
  • barelybear

    Re: thank you!! It was good to get the first exemplar out of the way ahah. Mine are pretty spread out which means I’ll get to do a lot of seeing everyone else’s :D
    Very excited!

    7 months ago
  • SamRose

    Re: Aw thank you!! :)

    7 months ago
  • Avril

    Re: Thanks Zirong! That means a lot ;)

    7 months ago
  • Avril

    I love how you wrote this! Being inspired in the middle of the night is such a struggle sometimes haha. The nuance in your last line, "Too sleep-deprived to be a good girl" is just brilliant!

    7 months ago
  • kathryn siena

    this is such a mood, and I can totally relate to it

    7 months ago
  • Parisienne

    We owe bus No 12 a lot!! So relatable, I honestly feel like without sleep I am just a zombie :D. Love this piece Zirong, including your message box - it's so sweet.
    re: Thank you I am glad you liked it, and I admire you a lot for concentrating in science class (especially Physics - my mind used to run itself out of the window when I took that class :D).
    I'm okay thanks, a bit down at the moment and I am really not sure why. I just get depressed sometimes (always have really) and lockdown is not helping tbh. Anyway, more importantly how are you??? This isn't a super depressing piece - just honest. Is school any less stressful for you? I really hope so :)
    Oooooh you lucky thing that gap year sounds like perfection! Japan seems amazing doesn't it? I would love to see the cherry blossoms and Giant cranes there. Plus, SUSHI!!!!! Awhhh Japanese anime is so cute I can see why you like it, some of the anime art is INSANELY good (almost makes me wanna cry acc haha). YESSSS please visit the UK it would be so amazing to meet you and show you around. Many vanilla lattes and Fish and Chips required :D.
    Good idea for making money as gap years can be SO expensive. I actually haven't managed to ever have a job (which I am a little embarrassed about, as our culture makes it a central teenage activity). Have you ever had a job?
    Thank you for your positivity and yes I am hopeful that things in the UK will improve before long. It will be good to get my life back :D.
    Thank you for your kind words, I'm here for you too. Have a great term and good luck with your exams Zirong <3
    Becca <333

    7 months ago
  • ulymoly

    This just hit different when I’m lagging behind my classes and I’m getting anxiety attacks late at night because of it.

    7 months ago