Anne Blackwood

United States

16
Christian
Theatre kid
Singer (soprano)
Poet
Twin (fraternal)
Spoonie
Disfusive
Highly Sensitive Person
Living oxymoron
Kindness Krusader: Blueberry cotton candy
XXFJ, Melancholic-Sanguine, ambivert

Joined 1/16/20

Message to Readers

Anyone wanna help me build the speaker's character a bit? Maybe help me give him a name, too? Emily is kinda underdeveloped as well, so if you guys have ideas for her, I'd love that. Even if I don't write a series of poems about them, I'd still like to have them more fleshed out in my head, so any suggestions are welcome.

for emily i. | unfiltered

February 28, 2021

FREE WRITING

18

and for a moment, i saw you,
hair spilling out of your messy bun that was
getting ever-messier by the second.

you noticed it immediately, of course.
your eyes widened like a deer's,
frozen with the knowledge that at that moment,
control was no longer in your grasp,
and it might be your undoing.

i saw your hands trembling
as they tried to gather every loose strand into place.
you needed things to be perfect,
needed them to be alright,

and i don't think this was about a hair malfunction at all.

i understand that there's something to be said
for being put-together;
after all, it's probably nice to look in the mirror,
proud of what you've accomplished.

and in the two seconds that you came undone,
you were scared.
vulnerability feels like coming just short of a handhold.
but holy crap, i don't think i've ever seen something
so beautiful
as you.
Wow. This is totally out of my comfort zone. /nervous /excited
It was inspired by Ness's piece, ramble #1. Okay, that's not exactly true. I saw how beautiful her "messiness" was in that piece and decided to write a piece about "that" (the quotes are because I had no real idea what I was inspired by in the moment). /lh So somewhere along the way, this became a poem/diary entry from the perspective of a guy who likes this girl named Emily and a moment he noticed. I'm getting Evan Hansen vibes but also maybe the guy from Stargirl (which I haven't actually read or watched but he feels right). She's this straight-A student (maybe shy? idk yet) who probably has some sort of gifted child syndrome (but I don't think she's figured that out yet).
I suddenly want to write a book about them like Serendipity and Me (super underrated btw) where it's a novel but written with the format of a poem the whole way through (if that makes sense /uncertain /lh). That's almost definitely never going to happen, but this might become a series.
Also, this took a lot longer to write than I expected it to, especially choosing her name for some reason. (Dmoral the name poetry is contagious apparently)

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13 Comments
  • SamRose

    Wow this is so pretty! It came to life in my mind and I could clearly picture Emily with her messy bun that she was trying to straighten, but it fell out and framed her face. This would make a great series! Let me know it you ever write one! :)


    2 months ago
  • GertyGerty

    wow. This is beautiful. I would love to see it become part of a long-form story told through poetry. There is a book called "Let Them Eat Chaos" by Kae Tempest that uses this concept and I think it was also made into a studio album?? Anyways, I highly recommend it if you are interested in longer poetic works.
    Can't wait to see where you take this piece :)


    2 months ago
  • Ava Marie

    So pretty!! I love this


    2 months ago
  • BriRiley

    Oh wow this is beautiful! I love the ending!


    2 months ago
  • Mr. Enoki

    Re: I'm totally ok with you using me for inspo a little! /excited /g. Also if I have any ideas I'll be sure to text you :) Also, I'm glad you like my new username! (/excited /happy) I've been thinking of changing it for a while, and I think it will be fun to have something freshhhh /hopeful. Also also, Enoki is a type of mushroom, and a name I'm obsessed with /g


    2 months ago
  • Mr. Enoki

    Cri :')
    I am in love with these characters and this poem!!! I definitely see myself a lot in the main character your writing, and I feel like you captured the anxiousness and love and longing just so so well >-< /g. I definitely want to see more about them in the future and (if it's okay with you) maybe write something about them myself as well! /excited /g. If you need help/get stuck writing the mc, be sure to reach out :))) I really really loved it! Amazing job .g
    *bows down to amazing writer and piece /hj


    2 months ago
  • anemoia (#words)

    re: XD tysm i'm grinning over here. songwriting has become addicting. i just have to do the musical parts too
    I LOOKED UP MIMEOMIA OH MY GOSH I MIGHT WRITE AN ENTRY ON MY OTHER PIECE ABOUT IT. I RELATE SOOO MUCH. THANK YOU FOR SUGGESTING IT TO ME.
    re re (i guess?): oh, yeah, i see what you mean about emily's character. for an actual novel, you would need the character to be more developed. but in this piece, it feels mysterious and intriguing.


    2 months ago
  • anemoia (#words)

    re: oh my goshhhh i'm so flattered *cue nervous giggles* if only i had a great melody for it! i've got a recording, but it's just so i don't forget how it's going to sound. maybe i'll push that one into priority spot for chord arrangement!


    2 months ago
  • anemoia (#words)

    ooooh wow i would very much like to see what else you do with this stunning poem story! emily seems fairly well developed to me... i'm trying to think of anything you could add but i got nothing. it's all so well said.


    2 months ago
  • Avril

    Re: Oh I see that makes sense! I can't wait to see where you go with it!
    And thanks! :)


    2 months ago
  • Avril

    This is beautiful wow! I actually don't think Emily is underdeveloped at all! I love how you took something small that she did and used to show a deeper part of her personality. I love the lines, "and in the two seconds that you came undone/you were scared" Brilliant writing!


    2 months ago
  • Rohan’s Defender

    Hey Anne! Hope you’re doing well! I just wanted to let you know that I sent out another email about the virtual summer camp!


    2 months ago
  • lochnessie

    aw wow! thanks anne! this is sooo gorgeous


    2 months ago