Below, you'll see any text that was highlighted with comments from the reviewer.
Message to Readers
I know I didn't exactly stick to the prompt, but I really enjoyed writing this. :)
Hope you have a great day/night! <3
My favorite element of this piece is the symbolism of behind it; a loss of innocence and how it changes the way people see things. As children, we have a sense of wonder and magic about the world, but as we grow older, our perception changes with a harsh reality until that magic is gone. The ending line "The Star hadn't lost its magic. I had." really portrays this theme well. Very intriguing.
Perhaps you could add some dialogue to flesh out your loss of innocence and maybe describe the patterns you "linked" with your eyes just a bit more to help bring out the magic of this piece. However, these are merely suggestions and you don't have to take them. Also, what inspired you to write this piece other than the prompt?
Hello Starlitskies, it's your friendly neighborhood Senior Peer Reviewer and I very much enjoyed reviewing this piece of yours. I found it to be very deeply symbolic on the loss of childhood innocence and just how it can affect a person, very intriguing indeed. While there are some things in need of improvement, it's still a really good piece. I fully encourage you to keep writing and have a wonderful day.
Btw, this is merely a minor comment, but I find it quite ironic you wrote a piece about stars because your user name is Starlitskies!